1. Grd 8: Development of Self in Society Term 1 Lesson 2- Influences on sexuality
Welcome back class!
We’re gonna jump right in and start with where we ended the last lesson. We were looking at the different influences on our sexuality. You were required to complete Part 3 of Activity 1 for homework. I want you to discuss in your groups your answers before we continue.
As a group choose one set of answers that you give as feedback to the class. Try to come to an agreement on which answers you will use.

2. You belong to me- Taylor Swift
3.1
Describe 2 stereotypes of women and 2 stereotypes of men from this clip.
3.2
How would you describe the ‘nerdy girls’ self esteem in this clip?
3.3
Write the ending to this story. How will there love story end?
3.4
What does the media in this clip tell us about what we should be like to get the girl or the guy?
Let the feedback begin... Allow each group opportunity to give feedback on the first clip. Take note of how the groups have answered 3.3. This will be a guideline to ideas on casual sex and relationships.
Here are some generic answers. Allow the learners to give their own answers.
3.1 Describe 2 stereotypes of women and 2 stereotypes of men from this clip.- they could refer to the sexy, dark haired cheerleader always gets the cute guy. The nerdy girl next door never gets the guy. The guy is your typical handsome, football player is popular and good-looking. She assumes he would never go for her.
Ask the class if they think this is a realistic picture of people today..
3.2 How would you describe the ‘nerdy girls’ self esteem in this clip? She seems to be insecure and shy, not confident to tell the guy how she feels.
3.3 Write the ending to this story. How will there love story end?
Some might say they become the cute popular couple that are inseparable and then one day get married and have kids.
Others might say that they loved and then went their separate ways.
Ask the class, if they thought she would have gone with him and had sex the evening of the dance. If she did, why would she have done it? If not, then why not? (There will be more time for this discussion later)
3.4 What does the media in this clip tell us about what we should be like to get the girl or the guy?
Maybe it implies you have to be pretty, change into a princess to get the guy? Maybe its about taking risks.

3. Love Story- Taylor Swift
4.1
What does the media in this clip tell us about what we should be like to get the girl or the guy?
4.2
Write the ending to this story. How will there love story end?
4.3
Even though it’s the same person singing in both music videos, what do these clips tell us about Taylor Swift and her self concept and sexuality?
20min to end of this slide- Now allow feedback from the second clip. Use the learners answers to guide a discussion on the influence that media has on the image of sexuality that is portrayed. The learners will have opportunity to self reflect later in the lesson.
Here are some generic answers. Allow the learners to give their own answers.
4.1 What does the media in this clip tell us about what we should be like to get the girl or the guy? This is a different story to the first clip. It feels like an old fashion fairytale. So to be a lady, with morals, value who longs for the guy but will do it right.
4.2 Write the ending to this story. How will there love story end? This story ends with the man asking her to marry him so they can be together forever. Its as though that’s her fairytale dream.
Do you believe that people still wait to have sex once they get married only? Why do they? Or why don’t they?
4.3 Even though it’s the same person singing in both music videos, what do these clips tell us about Taylor Swift and her self concept and sexuality?
She seems to long for romance and love and acceptance. It shows she is insecure but feels valued when she has a guy.

4. Answer the following TWO questions in your groups: 1) Why do friends and peers have so much influence on your ideas around sex and sexuality in your teen years? 2) How do your friends use peer pressure to influence your choices about sex and sexuality?
5-10min- During your teeanage years, your friends and peers seem to have the greatest influence in your life. They also appear to be the greatest source of information regarding sexual issues and often teenagers ask one another for advice. This advice given would have a great influence on what your friend does. So, if you wanted to see a doctor if you were sick, you would go to someone who you know could help you get better because they have the right information. At the end of this lesson you will have time to complete a quiz to see how much you know about sex and sexuality.
But before we get to that, lets take a look at your why your friends and peers are such a huge influence in your life. In your groups, on a large piece of paper, write down 3 reasons for the above TWO questions. Then choose a spokesperson to share your reasons.
Why do friends and peers have so much influence on your ideas around sex and sexuality in your teen years?
Most leareners would say somehthing like:
You feel like you need to fit in with your peers so you would rather listen to them and do things that they think are cool.
You dont seem to get along with your parents anymore.
They are easy to talk to and quick to tell you about what they have done.
How do your friends use peer pressure to influence your choices about sex and sexuality?
They tell us about their own sexual experiences and put pressure on us to do the same
They make us feel like we have to do this to fit in and be accepted
Their opinions influence us, this can also be positive.
Be open to their other responces.

5. Should a young girl marry a 37 year old man?
15min.
Intro: We know that just like your identity can be influenced by your culture and religion, so too can your views on sex and sexuality. Remember we are not trying to point fingers and say who is right and who is wrong today. The aim is to respect one another. With that in mind, lets look at these two case studies.
Discuss the following points as a class. Give opportunity for answers:
What age was Thea when her parents arranged her marriage?
Why would her parents have believed it was a good idea to marry her off so young?
Do you think she would be expected to have sex with her husband at the age of 12? Do you think this is right?
At the end of the clip it shows her walking away from her groom without saying yes. What do you t hink happened after that?
How would you feel if your parents told you they had arranged a marriage for you?
Do you think stories like this really happen?
Do you know any cultures that beleive in child marriage?
Do you know what the youngest age in South Africa is for marriage? (From Home Affairs documents: Under 18: In South Africa, if you are under 21 years of age, and have not been married before, you will need written consent of both of your parents on form BI-32. If only one of your parents is alive, or if you have a legal guardian, that person may sign the form BI-32. If your parents will not give consent for you to marry, you can request consent from a Judge of the High Court. Consent by a judge is given only if parental consent was unreasonably refused or there is sufficient evidence that getting marriage is in the best interest of the minor. If you are a male under the age of 18, or a female under the age of 15, you will need the consent of the Minister of Home Affairs in addition to your parents' consent. If you manage to get married under the age of 21 without consent, your parents can ask to have your marriage dissolved.

6. What does your religion say about: 1 Sex before marriage
2 Relationships
3 Contraception
4 Teen pregnancy
5 Drinking Alcohol
Ask learner to take a few minutes and answer these questions in their workbooks. Tell them they are private answers but if anybody would like to share, it would be helpful. The next slide will be questions they answer privatley in their workbooks.
Total 15min for slide 4, 5 and 6..

7. How would your family react if you came home and told your parents the following?
1 I want to go out to a club with my friends this weekend.
2 I only had a few drinks with a friend, I woke up and I think somebody raped me.
3 I am old enough to choose my own boyfriend or a girlfriend.
4 I don’t ever want to get married.
5 I have struggled with my gender forever and I would like to get a sex change.
6 A boy asked me to send a naked picture of myself and I did. Now he sent it to all of his friends because I don’t want to sleep with him.
7 I want to choose my own husband/ wife one day when I am ready, after I finish high school and get my matric.
Answer these questions in your workbook.

8. Are you ready to play?
15min and homework. Remember earlier on this lesson, I mentioned you’ll have a chance to see what your general knowledge is like when it comes to sex and sexuality. And see what kind of advice you would give to your friends. This quiz is like a game, you can play it over and over again to try and improve your score. You’ll be competing against your classmates so goodl luck! Remember if there is something you would like more info on, put it in a letter and drop it in the mailbox in class and we’ll address the issue in general.