1. Continuation Writing Web 2018-4-19 ——Analysis and Assessment
WZ No. 51 High School
Web

3. Task 1: Review the story

4. What should be written in these 2 paragraphs?
Paragraph 1 I remembered too well the early years we had spent with my real father. __________________________________
__________________________________
Paragraph 2 When Leo, my mother, and I entered the courtroom, my real father was already present. _____________________

5. Paragraph 1 I remembered too well the early years we had spent with my real father. ________.
Student A: My real father always looked after me carefully, although sometimes he would be strict.
Student B: My real father left us, but Leo did much for us, so I considered Leo as my father.
Student C: My real father worked too hard to be with our family, so mother decided to leave him.
Student D: My real father drank, gambled(赌博) and beat my mother. Finally they got divorced. I was scared to see him in the courtroom.

6. My real father drank, gambled(赌博) and beat my mother
My real father drank, gambled(赌博) and beat my mother. Finally they got divorced. I was scared to see him in the courtroom.
I was learning what it meant to have a father. (Para. 2)
I, who had previously spent the childhood watching other families do these everyday activities,…(Para. 4)
I realize that Leo gave me what I needed most- the experience of doing ordinary things together as a family. (Para. 4)
my real father- who hadn’t seen or supported my mother or me for more than five years (Para. 5)

7. √ ╳ Task 2: Enrich our story. 读后续写写作标准： 1.与所给短文及段落开头语的衔接程度； 2.内容的丰富性
Para. 1 I remembered too well the early years we spent with my real father. When I was little, he never did anything like a father. My mother just meant an ATM for him. He couldn’t plant, cook or drive me to school. Because of him, my mother and I moved into the old apartment. We hated him. (43 words)
读后续写写作标准：
1.与所给短文及段落开头语的衔接程度；
2.内容的丰富性 √ ╳
Give an example!

8. Para. 1 I remembered too well the early years we spent with my real father. When I was little, he never did anything like a father. My mother just meant an ATM for him. He couldn’t plant, cook or drive me to school. Because of him, my mother and I moved into the old apartment. We hated him. (43 words)
Para. 1 I remembered too well the early years we spent with my real father. When I was little, he never did anything like a father. My mother just meant an ATM for him. One night, he returned late and asked my mother for money. She said he was a devil, and they had a terrible fight, while I was almost scared to death. He couldn’t plant, cook or drive me to school. Because of him, my mother and I moved into the old apartment. We hated him. (78 words)
Tip: Enrich your story by adding a specific example.

9. Task 3: Try to evaluate the versions according to the standard
Task 3: Try to evaluate the versions according to the standard. Give your reasons.
读后续写写作标准：(√/ ╳ )
Version 1
Version 2
与所给短文及段落开头语的衔接程度;
2. 内容的丰富性

10. Task 4: Rewrite paragraph 1 of Version 2.
Paragraph 1 I remembered too well the early years we had spent with my real father. ⑴He fought my mother every night. ⑵He seemed to be always drinking and was addicted to nicotine. ⑶He never gave my mother and me a real family. ⑷My childhood is always desperate and awful. ⑸Our home never had smiles.

11. One possible version
Paragraph 1 I remembered too well the early years we had spent with my real father. ⑴He fought my mother every night. As a result, I could always hear her crying in the restroom, which made me sad deep inside. ⑵He seemed to be always drinking and was addicted to nicotine. The most words from him were demands for money and curses. If he was not satisfied, nobody could feel secure. ⑶He never gave my mother and me a real family. ⑷Therefore, My childhood is always desperate and awful.

12. Homework
Rewrite paragraph 2 of Version 2.

13. Thank you!