1. Soft Skills
Part 3
Self-Advocacy

2. What is advocacy?
The definition of advocacy is the act of speaking on the behalf of or in support of another person, place, or thing.
An example of an advocacy is a non-profit organization that works to help women of domestic abuse who feel too afraid to speak for themselves.
Source:

3. What is self-advocacy? Speaking up or writing in support of yourself
Standing up for your rights
Standing up against discrimination
Can you think of some examples where you would need to speak on behalf of yourself or write something on behalf of yourself?

4. Activity #1: When have you advocated for yourself
Activity #1: When have you advocated for yourself? When have others advocated for you?
Can you think of some examples where you would need to speak on behalf of yourself or write something on behalf of yourself?

5. You need to be able to advocate on behalf of yourself.
Why?
Some people have advocates such as family, friends or organizations that can help with them. However,other organizations or people can't meet all of your needs.
Even when you have an advocate helping you, being a part of the process can make you stronger and help you feel good about yourself.

6. Benefits of Self-Advocacy
improved self esteem
being able to communicate effectively
improved problem solving skills
being more assertive
Can you think of any others?

7. Other Benefits
In order for others to know that you disagree with them or that your rights have been disregarded, you need to tell them!
You know best what you feel, think, need and what your life situation is. Do not wait for others to speak up on your behalf – it may never happen!
The people who have the authority to make decisions over your situation may think that every thing is fine if you do not speak up.
By speaking out, you may be helping other people in the same or similar situations.
You have a responsibility to take care of yourself. Speaking out will help you to keep your self-respect and dignity, even if you do not always get what you want.
Remember that rules may not always be fair or suitable for you. You have the right to question rules, as they may not apply to your situation.
Source: Advocacy Curriculum (Self Help Alliance, 2010), p. 11

8. Many people self-doubt.
In order to advocate on your own behalf you have to believe in yourself.
Many people self-doubt.
Examples of self-doubt statements or thoughts:
I can't do it
I'm not smart enough
I'm afraid other people will laugh at what I have to say
I am afraid I will fail
Have you ever doubted yourself?

9. Activity #2: Things I cannot do

10. Your Inner Voice Do you have an inner voice?
You inner voice is the sum total of all your life experiences, values and morals. Your inner voice is driven by your conscience. It helps you determine what is right and wrong. It also expresses how you feel about yourself.
Is your inner voice negative or positive?
Discuss the fact that we all have an inner voice.  Talk about what every thinks an inner voice is.
Suggest to the learners that they shouldn't listen to an inner voice that is always negative regarding how they feel about themselves .  

11. Activity #3: How positive is your self-image?
close your eyes and picture yourself behaving.....

12. There are many ways a person can change negative thoughts and self-criticism to more realistic and positive thoughts.
Focusing on all of them at once may be overwhelming, but focusing on a few at a time and reminding yourself of these positive approaches regularly can change your self-esteem.

13. Using Positive Thought Strategies
Positive thought strategies are tools that can help you improve your self- esteem and become a stronger self- advocate.

14. 8 Positive Thought Strategies​
1. Avoid exaggerating
2. Stop negative thoughts in their tracks
3. Be positive
4. Accept your flaws and imperfections
5. Don't be a bully!
6. Don't feel guilty about things beyond your control
7. Be kind to yourself
8. Look on the bright side
Review each strategy (see the handout).  Discuss each strategy as a group.
Follow along on the Positive Thought Strategies handout and circle or highlight strategies you think might work for you.

15. Positive Affirmations
Affirmations are positive, specific statements that help you to overcome self-sabotaging, negative thoughts. They help you visualize, and believe in, what you're affirming to yourself, helping you to make positive changes to your life and career.
Source:

16. Control negative feelings such as frustration, anger, or impatience.
You can use affirmations in any situation where you'd like to see a positive change take place. These might include times when you want to: 
Raise your confidence before speaking to other people, making presentations or going to important meetings.
Control negative feelings such as frustration, anger, or impatience. 
Improve your self-esteem. 
Finish projects you've started. 
Improve your productivity. 
Source:

17. Tip1:
Affirmations should be formed in the present tense, as if they're already happening. This helps you believe that the statement is true right now. For instance, "I am well-prepared and well-rehearsed, and I can give a great presentation" would be a great affirmation to use if you often feel nervous speaking in front of a group. 
Tip 2:
The power of affirmations also lies in their repetition. It's useful to recite your affirmations several times a day (have them pop up in your computer diary). You also need to repeat your affirmation as soon as you start to engage in a negative thought or behavior. 
Tip 3:
Affirmations are more effective when they're thought or said with feeling. Every affirmation you choose to repeat should be a phrase that's meaningful to you. You need to want this change to happen. 
Source:

18. Examples of Positive Affirmation Statements
I have plenty of creativity for this project.
I can do this! 
My opinion is respected and valued by my family.
I am successful. 
I am honest in my life, and my work. 
I like completing tasks and projects on time. 
I'm grateful for the job I have. 
I'm bringing a positive attitude to school every day.
I am excellent at what I do. 
I am generous. 
I am happy. 

19. Activity #4: Positive Affirmation Statements
Complete the list of positive affirmation statements. Write down four positive affirmation statements you can use that apply to things that are happening in your life right now.

20. Emotions any of the feelings of joy, sorrow, fear, hate, love, etc.
Source: dictionary.com
How do you think your emotions affect your ability to be a good self-advocate?
Do you think there is a difference based on whether you are male or female?
Women and men are taught/trained to express and repress different feelings based on there perceived value/vulnerability. This may be related to survival in primitive times and to make the person more attractive relative to current cultural values.
For males it is common to suppress feelings of sadness, and fear. They are told to endure pain. They may be told in childhood to “take it like a man” and “there is no need to cry over that”. Showing fear may be seen as a sign of weakness and with any expression a person may be labeled a “wimp”.
Women are often told it is not “lady like” to show anger. Sometimes, women are shown that they can use being upset and crying to their advantage, for example, to get out a speeding ticket.
Both genders are told "There's no reason to feel that way," and are encouraged to emphasize only the cognitive experience.
Source: Advocacy  Curriculum (Self Help Alliance, 2010), p. 25

21. Activity #5 - Positive and Negative Feelings
Review the list of feelings and decide if they are positive or negative.
Think of a way to express the negative feelings more positively.

22. Using Positive Language
You are responsible for yourself.
One of the skills you need to be able to take care of yourself is to be able to speak out and speak up.
Improving your communication skills can help you do that.
Using positive language when you communicate will help you be a better self-advocate.

23. Using Positive Language
Feelings are our own and people are entitled to them. Saying “You make me feel” may be taken as blaming others for our emotions as well as not recognizing they belong to me.
Taking ownership of feelings involves coming to the understanding that my feeling reactions and experiences originate within me. They may be precipitated by external experiences and it is a more appropriate characterization and more accurate to say “When you did this” or “When that happened” “I feel” whatever feelings arose.
“I messages” are a great way to own our feelings and still express our needs to others.
Source: Advocacy Curriculum (Self Help Alliance, 2010), p. 28

24. Using Positive Language: The "I-Message"
The formula for an I-message is:
I feel _________________________________ (say your feeling)
when you _____________________________ (describe the action)
because _______________________________ (say why the action connects to your feeling)
Source: Advocacy Curriculum (Self Help Alliance, 2010), p. 28

25. Activity #6 : Using Positive Language
I feel when you because

26. Activity #7: Being Fearful
Ask yourself: What is it that I am afraid of?
Then ask yourself: What is the worst thing that can happen?
Being afraid can cause you to act passively
Add an activity with examples?

27. Being Angry
Being a good self-advocate doesn't mean being an angry person.
You can be assertive and speak up for yourself without being aggressive and appearing angry.
Anger might be the motivation for self-advocacy but you need to be able to control your anger to get other people to listen to you.
Anger can cause you to act or speak aggressively.

28. Activity #8: Anger Checklist
Complete the checklist to see if you need to work on your anger management skills.

29. This Power Point was created by Laubach Literacy Ontario. ​
The resources can be downloaded free of charge at 
This Employment Ontario project is funded in part by the Government of Canada and the Government of Ontario and through the Canada-Ontario Job Fund Agreement.
All website links were accurate at the time of original development. ​
All of the images and clip art used in this Power Point are from Clipart.com and Microsoft Office.com.​