1. 550 Christian Coaching Foundations I
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2. Review last week Heart goals – share?? what did you write?
what level of commitment did you make ?
Did you complete the goal?
How do you feel about your progress?

3. Week three objectives
Fives steps to building the coaching relationship
Build a partnership
Clarify Assumptions
Explore the Issues
Evaluate the Client
Building the Coaching Agreement
Chapter 6 – The Coaching Skills: Listening, Questioning, and Responding
Questioning & Responding will be covered in Week 4

4. Building the partnership
COACHING IS AN ALLIANCE
PURPOSE IS TO MEET THE CLIENTS NEEDS & GOALS
COACH IS TO HELP THE CLIENT ARTICULATE
DREAMS
DESIRES
ASPIRATIONS
CLARIFY MISSION, PURPOSE, & GOALS
HELP CLIENT ACHIEVE THE OUTCOME

5. EXPLAIN YOUR INTENTIONS
IN THE BEGINNING OF THE RELATIONSHIP ITS IMPORTANT TO BE UPFRONT WITH THE CLIENT – TELL THEM WHAT COACHING LOOKS LIKE
WALK THEM THROUGH THE COACHING PROCESS

6. “…AUTHENTIC CURIOUSITY IS A POWERFUL BUILDER OF RELATIONSHIPS”
-Laura Whitworth, Karen Kimsey-House
& Philip Sandhal (coauthors of Co-Active Coaching)

7. Show curiosity by asking questions

8. What? When? Why? How? Why?

9. Clarifying assumptions
Why is this important?

10. Do you see the common thread in all this thinking?
Two words: misplaced expectations.
When you expect people, places, and things
to fulfill your wants, you will be disappointed.
And anytime you put your expectations for help
in the wrong place, the result is fear.”  ― Gary Smalley, The DNA of Relationships

11. What are some assumptions about coaching?
See table 5-1 (page 88)

12. Exploring issues
From session to session – different issues might arise
What concerns the client originally, may not be a topic that persists all the way through
According to Gary Collins – four questions are used as a mental guideline to understand the client’s issue’s:
How might coaching be useful?
Where are you now?
How would you like things to be different?
What will get in the way?

13. Evaluating the client
Why do we evaluate the client?

14. The coaching client Wants to grow and change
Has made efforts to change within the past year
Is willing to consider new assumptions, values, behaviors, and ideas
Is capable of thinking about the future
Is open to learning
Is committed to making changes
Is open to God’s leading in the coaching process
Is willing to learn from others
Is not afraid to take risks
Is willing to restructure their lives if necessary
Is “in sync” and appear to have good chemistry with the coach

15. Appendix b - evaluating coaching potential
See page 357

16. Agreeing to work together
You have both discussed the relationship and are in agreement that there is a need to work together.
Get acquainted – learn about their story – show genuine curiosity

17. (Institute for Life Coach Training)
Alliances that empower clients, support their learning and development, clarify…and fully embrace the partnership between coach and client. – Patrick Williams and Diane S. Menendez
(Institute for Life Coach Training)

18. Building the coaching alliance
Explain what coaching is and what it is not (fact sheet appendix c page 359)
Explain how it differs from Counseling
Share about your background (how you got into coaching and what qualifies you to be a good coach)
Discuss Assumptions and Clarify Mutual Expectations
Make it clear that you will keep everything confidential
Decide what you will discuss/talk about together, how often, and cancelations of appointments
Talk about boundaries (ie: when they can call etc)
If charging for services, discuss billing and payment

19. Obstacles to listening
Thinking about the next question
Looking for problems, pathology, and past experiences that are creating present difficulties
Distractions
Biased Listening
Interruptions

20. Building the coaching alliance
Written agreement – see Appendix D page 362
States what coaching is and what what you and your client can expect and how you will proceed
Discuss the form with your clients
Sign copies and provide one for self and one for client
“Getting to know you” Appendix E page (intake form)
Use this form during initial coaching sessions to get to know the client
Welcome packet –
Fact Sheet about Coaching – answers commonly asked questions
Contract or Agreement – statement about policies and procedures
Confidentiality, fees, missed appointments, coach’s background and training, contact information, policies about the coach-client contact between sessions
Client data form (getting to know you)
One or two assessment measures (Graph of Life) appendix A page 355

21. Coaching and the race to life
Collins illustrates the race of life and how we need to keep our eyes fixed on Jesus and the finish line. This is so important as a coach to set the starting line and help coach the client to stay motivated to reach the finish line.
As a coach we do that by using the skills necessary to coach the client to identify their goals and objectives, and avoid hindrances and entanglements
It is necessary for the coach to learn and use the necessary skills to coach effectively

22. The coaching skills: listening
Listening Attentively
Informal Listening
Active Listening
Intuitive Listening
Obstacles to listening

23. Listening attentively
When we ask questions or give advice, we tend to feel in control, as if WE are moving the process forward.
In contrast, listening demands more patience, concentration, and focus as well as the ability to keep quiet.
Listening demonstrates respect, interest, and willingness to connect and understand.
try to hear what is below the surface: the person’s feelings, insecurities, self-doubt, conflicts, and discouragement.
listen to positive things such as, hopes, strengths, values, passions, competencies, excitements, and dreams.
Value in listening to what is said and what is not said
Goal of actively listening is to hear the content of what the person is saying and pick up attitudes, frustrations, and dreams more implied than stated.

24. Informal listening Passive listening
May or may not be “paying attention”
May not be showing interest
May not respond appropriately
May not notice expressions, posture physical cues, tone of voice, and pace of speech
Only listening to get the information YOU need to know
Listening for facts

25. Active listening Concentrates on what is being said
Pays close attention
Shows awareness of the speaker
Makes brief comments
Asks clarifying questions
The speaker knows they are being heard based on the physical cues they receive from those listening.
Being engaged
Has a focus on the SPEAKER

26. Intuitive listening High level of concentration and awareness
Listen for inconsistencies
What am I really hearing behind the words
Picking up what the client really has in mind
Recognize patterns
Recognize deep seeded beliefs
Recognize self-sabotaging beliefs, attitudes, and habits
Reference point for other things that are said and also to weigh against goals and objectives

27. Good coaches hear
H – hopes and dreams about how things could be better
E – energies and passions that appear to inspire the person, but also the energy drainers that pull the person down
A – attitudes and abilities that impact how one sees potential for the future but that might be squelched or frustrated in the present
R – routines, habits, and ways of doing things that might need to be changed

28. Rule of thumb
Coaches should spend 80 percent of their time listening