Wordy Frames 1 Version 1.0 This is one of a series of units available here to help you write sentences well. Please view this unit as a slide show.here.

Wordy Frames 1 Version 1.0 This is one of a series of units available here to help you write sentences well. Please view this unit as a slide show.here This unit includes about 135 slides. Each slide includes three columns. The left column presents editing cues and problematic text. The middle column repeats the text and permits editing. The right column presents model answers and commentary. Examine these three columns now: Press the down arrow to reveal your editing tools. If you are viewing this slide in a slide show, then please press the right arrow on your keyboard and reveal the model column. Way to go! Problem Column Editing Column Model Column Marshall Lev Dermer © 2013 All Rights Reserved

For editing you can use: the cursor to mark text; the mouse and the keyboard’s arrows to move the cursor; and the four shortcut keys below: Short Cut Function ctrl-ccopy marked text ctrl-xcut marked text ctrl-vpaste marked text To remember the short cut for paste, think of the “v” as the first letter in “Velcro.” Press the down arrow to cut some words. Marshall Lev Dermer © 2013 All Rights Reserved

In the editing column, use your tools to cut the needless words. Problem Column Editing Column Model Column Contrary to previous reports... # 181 Compare your revision with the model. Is your revision as concise? Do both revisions have about the same meaning as the original (in the problem column)? Press the down arrow to learn more about revising. Press the right arrow to reveal the model revision. Marshall Lev Dermer © 2013 All Rights Reserved

In the model columns, I’ve provided “professional” revisions, but there is no absolutely right revision for revisions vary across editors. Indeed, one editor may revise many times, over many days. Moreover there is the issue of context. In this unit you usually will be editing text without much context such as a next sentence or the paragraph in which the text could appear. So what should you do? Given the cue, such as wordy, revise as best you can. If you can think of several revisions then enter them. Crafting multiple revisions now sans context, will help you edit later with context. Here you will be asked to edit for a reader with considerable editing experience. As you revise more and more text, your style will become increasingly like that of an experienced editor. In the process, you will be acquiring a basic skill that will help you edit when text appears in context! Press the down arrow for a request for your help. Marshall Lev Dermer © 2013 All Rights Reserved

You will be using the “first edition” of this unit. So it is very possible that your revisions are better than mine. If so, could you forward them to me here?here Please include the version number of this unit (see the top of Slide 1) and the number of the slide as it appears in the model revision column, for example, “# 102.” If your revision is helpful, then with your consent I will use your revision and add your name to the list of contributors here.here Press the down arrow for advice about skill learning. Marshall Lev Dermer © 2013 All Rights Reserved

Four Factors that Promote Skill Learning Location instructions or advicesee web page that corresponds to this unit examples see above practicerevising the many texts in this unit constructive feedbackcomparing your revisions with the model revisions Practice is vital. It is best to study for 20 minutes daily and carefully work through the slides, typing revisions, comparing, etc. After each session, store this unit on your computer. Then retrieve the unit the next day as needed to finish the unit. Factors that promote skill learning and their location in these instructional materials are listed in the table below. Please review the table. Press the down arrow for advice about the “next step.” Marshall Lev Dermer © 2013 All Rights Reserved

When you have finished a unit, the best next step is not to move on to a new unit but to review your revisions. If you have been storing this unit then you have been storing your revisions. So review them! This is what experienced researchers do; sometimes they revise more than ten times. In this regard, consider Lee J. Cronbach’s comments in his "Four Psychological Bulletin Articles in Perspective,” (Psychological Bulletin, 1992, 112, 389-392):Lee J. Cronbach’s In the days before word processors, I found 10 retypings of a manuscript none too many, and that implies many rereadings by me. Pages going back to my typist often carried scribbles in five colors, each new color representing an additional reading. Always, one sees floating pronouns to anchor, sentences to clarify or vivify, paragraphs to move, digressions to delete... I advise the inexperienced writer to leave a near-final draft in a drawer for a few weeks and, returning to it fresh, to read it aloud. Try to listen through the ears of a graduate student new to the paper, indeed, new to the topic. Press the down arrow to reveal another tool. Marshall Lev Dermer © 2013 All Rights Reserved

As you work through this unit, you will be encountering the slides in a fixed order. So, when you finish this unit and seek to review your work, it may be desirable to present the slides in a new order. Reordering is possible with a module written in Visual Basic for Applications. Below, is an image of the window you must access to run the module.Visual Basic for Applications Press the down arrow to learn about accessing the macro window Marshall Lev Dermer © 2013 All Rights Reserved

You can access the macro window when not in slide show mode. So, stop the slide show and press Alt-F8. When the window appears, press the run button. An hour-glass icon will appear on your screen. Randomizing the slides may require 50 seconds patiently wait for the icon’s removal. Of course, you must then restart the slide show to begin practicing. Just advance to the slide with the green bar below. There you have it. Practice and learn! --MLD Go for it! Marshall Lev Dermer © 2013 All Rights Reserved

Though participants are of the same age, they need not have identical verbal skills. Though participants are of the same age, their verbal skills may differ. # 61 # Marshall Lev Dermer © 2013 All Rights Reserved

A central role of the hippocampus is to consolidate conscious forms of learning and memory. Retrieved November 5, 2012 from http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/a rticles/PMC2078244/ # 156 Marshall Lev Dermer © 2013 All Rights Reserved

As had Smith and Jones (2010), we manipulated exercise and measured learning. The version above renders “Smith and Jones” important; the version below renders them less important. We manipulated exercise and measured learning (see Smith & Jones, 2010). # Marshall Lev Dermer © 2013 All Rights Reserved

As the number of miles walked daily increases, performance improves on memory tasks. Flesh and blood characters: Daily, as people walk more miles, they better perform memory tasks. Rather than describing a mere correlation, this revision suggests that people improve their memory by walking: Daily, as people walk more miles, they improve their memory. #34 Marshall Lev Dermer © 2013 All Rights Reserved

The shock upset the rat. The revision replaces the adjective “upset” with the verb “upset.” Here is another discussion of nominalizations. nominalizations # 175 Marshall Lev Dermer © 2013 All Rights Reserved

During World War II, only the highly intelligent were selected for training... The revision replaces the noun “selection” with the verb “selected.” With more of a flesh and blood character: During World War II, only highly intelligent persons were trained to... # 22 Marshall Lev Dermer © 2013 All Rights Reserved

In a replication, younger adults scored below older adults. The revision replaces the noun “scores” with the verb “scored.” Here is a discussion of nominalizations. nominalizations # 69 Marshall Lev Dermer © 2013 All Rights Reserved

Participants imagined. The revision replaces the noun “images” with the verb “imagine.” Here is a another discussion of nominalizations. nominalizations # 167 Marshall Lev Dermer © 2013 All Rights Reserved

A second study (Smith & Klein, 2011), tested if level of exercise affected memory. The revision parenthetically refers to the authors because it is not the authors but their work that is important. Want to emphasize the authors? Look here: In their second study, Smith and Klein (2011) tested if level of exercise affected memory. # 59 # Marshall Lev Dermer © 2013 All Rights Reserved

Unlike other studies, this study did not explore skill differences. With flesh and blood characters: Unlike other researchers, we did not explore skill differences. # 48 Marshall Lev Dermer © 2013 All Rights Reserved

They predicted that as age increased so did verbal skill. The revision replaces the noun “prediction” with the verb “predict.” Here are other versions: They predicted that verbal skill increased with age. They predicted that age and verbal skill covaried. # 60 # Marshall Lev Dermer © 2013 All Rights Reserved

Dissonance theory explains the attitude change in terms of inconsistent cognitions. Dissonance theory attributes the attitude change to inconsistent cognitions. # 236 Marshall Lev Dermer © 2013 All Rights Reserved

Responses to speech determine behavior. With flesh and blood characters and more words: How others respond to what you say determines what you do. What you do depends on how others respond to what you say. Your behavior depends on how others respond to your speech. #53 # Marshall Lev Dermer © 2013 All Rights Reserved

These findings replicate previous findings (Baron & Gottlieb, 2001)... The revision parenthetically refers to the authors because it is not the authors but their work that is important. This revision renders the authors important: As did Baron and Gottlieb (2001), we found that... # 27 Marshall Lev Dermer © 2013 All Rights Reserved

The participants enjoyed meditating. Above the noun phrase “experiencing joy” was replaced with the verb “enjoyed.” Certainly the revision is short but not synonymous with the original sentence. # 227 Marshall Lev Dermer © 2013 All Rights Reserved

The study of compliance continues since the 1950’s. If the next sentence begins this way: Compliance may be understood to have three components.... Then a revision that produces cohesion would be: Since the 1950’s, there have been studies of compliance. # 229 Marshall Lev Dermer © 2013 All Rights Reserved

In secure marriages, each partner shows recognition of the other's contributions. In secure marriages, each partner acknowledges the other's contributions. # 221 Marshall Lev Dermer © 2013 All Rights Reserved

Though participants are of the same age, they need not have identical verbal skills. Though participants are of the same age, their verbal skills may differ. Participants of the same age can have different levels of verbal skill. # 63 Marshall Lev Dermer © 2013 All Rights Reserved

Wordy Frames 1 Version 1.0 This is one of a series of units available here to help you write sentences well. Please view this unit as a slide show.here.

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Wordy Frames 1 Version 1.0 This is one of a series of units available here to help you write sentences well. Please view this unit as a slide show.here.

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Presentation on theme: "Wordy Frames 1 Version 1.0 This is one of a series of units available here to help you write sentences well. Please view this unit as a slide show.here."— Presentation transcript:

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