1. Active Constructive Responding and Praise
Resiliency
Active Constructive Responding and Praise

2. Mission and Vision
Mission: Implements the Comprehensive Soldier Fitness Program, identifies and trains Master Resiliency Trainers (MRTs) and commences annual resiliency sustainment training in order to enhance overall performance, improve unit level readiness, and sustain a balanced, healthy, campaign capable, expeditionary army
End state: Will improve unit readiness and performance by implementing the Resiliency Training program. The end state will see a more balanced, healthy and capable Brigade Combat Team
MRT Instructor:
Ask a participant to read the mission statement.
Ask for questions regarding the purpose of the course.
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3. Task, Conditions, Standards
Task: Learn to respond to others to build strong relationships and Praise to build mastery and winning streaks
Conditions: Within a classroom environment and 90 minute timeframe.
Standards: Understand that Connection is a primary target of ACR and Praise
MRT Instructor:
1. Discuss what it means to establish connections between people.
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4. Active Constructive Responding and Effective Praise
MRT Instructor:
Introduce Active Constructive Responding and Effective Praise.
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5. Bottom Line Up Front
Active Constructive Responding (ACR) and Effective Praise help to build Connection.
You can strengthen your relationships by responding actively and constructively to others’ positive experiences.
Effective Praise identifies what was working and creates winning streaks.
MRT Instructor:
Review the B.L.U.F. statements.
Ask for questions/comments.
Key Points:
Active Constructive Responding and Effective Praise help to build Connection.
The way you respond when someone shares a positive experience with you will affect the strength of that relationship.
Effective Praise identifies what the person did that brought about the positive outcome.
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6. Key Principles
Four types of responding: There are four ways people tend to respond when others share a positive experience: AC, AD, PC, PD.
ACR: ACR conveys authentic interest, and the responder helps the sharer think more deeply about the positive experience.
Benefits of ACR: ACR leads to stronger relationships, belonging, well-being, and life satisfaction for both parties.
Effective Praise: Name the strategy, process, or behavior that led to the good outcome. It builds motivation, optimism, and winning streaks.
Connection: ACR and Praise build all of the MRT competencies; Connection is a primary target.
MRT Instructor:
Review the key principles.
Ask for questions or comments.
Clarify any misconceptions.
Ask participants if there are any other key principles they would add to the list.
Emphasize that authenticity is critical in ACR.
Key Points:
ACR and Praise help to build the MRT competency of Connection.
Using ACR doesn’t mean you can’t bring up concerns. Concerns might be valid, but ask yourself if you should share them immediately or in a later conversation.
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7. Build Strong Relationships through ACR Based on work by Shelly Gable
There are four ways people tend to respond when others share good news, talk about a positive experience, or describe a success.
Only one of the four styles leads to stronger relationships.
MRT Instructor:
Review the points on the slide.
Tell the participants that you will describe four typical styles of responding when someone shares good news and that you want them to listen closely to each style and begin to think about which is most common for them.
Key Points:
There are four ways people tend to respond when others share good news.
Only one of the four styles leads to stronger relationships.
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8. What do we mean by positive experience?
The chow hall had ice cream and we were allowed to eat it.
I maxed my PT test.
I passed inspection.
I got a weekend pass.
I got to call home last night.
It wasn’t so hot out.
MRT Instructor:
Emphasize that positive experiences can be big or small.
Point out that the meaning associated with the positive experience is determined by the individual initiating the communication.
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9. But… how the other person responds matters.
Constructive
Destructive
Authentic interest, elaborates the experience; person feels validated and understood
Squashing the event, brings conversation to a halt; person feels ashamed, embarrassed, guilty, or angry
Quiet, understated support; conversation fizzles out; person feels unimportant, misunderstood, embarrassed, or guilty
Ignoring the event; conversation never starts; person feels confused, guilty, or disappointed
Active
MRT Instructor:
Review the four cells.
Emphasize that a key word in the Active Constructive box is authentic. It’s not cheerleading; it’s about helping the other person relive the positive event.
Explain that Active Constructive Responding helps you to linger over the good experience a little longer.
Point out that active destructive is being pessimistic and negative about another person’s good news.
Point out that attunement/modulation is also important. That is, it’s important to regulate your response based on the situation and needs of the other person (e.g., if the person who shares good news is modest, offering lots of praise might embarrass him and shut him down).
The skill is learning how to be active and constructive in a way that feels right to the other person.
Key Points:
The goal is to use ACR.
One size does not fit all: It is important to modulate your response so that it feels right to the other person.
Using ACR doesn’t mean you can’t bring up concerns.
Passive
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10. Private Jackson says to Private Carson:
“Hey, my wife called and told me she got a great job on post.”
Constructive
Destructive
That’s great. What’s the new job? When does it start? What did she say about it?
So who’s going to be looking after your son? I wouldn’t trust a babysitter.
That’s nice.
I got such a funny from my son. Listen to this...
Private Carson responds:
Total recommended time: 10 mins
Setup: 2 mins
Practice: 3 mins
Debrief: 5 mins
MRT Instructor:
Prepare note cards ahead of time with each of the four ways of responding.
Ask two participants to act out this role-play.
If the person playing Private Carson does not deliver the line with appropriate body language, affect, etc., coach him or her in doing it a second time.
Ask the group to name the style modeled and to discuss how that seemed to affect Private Jackson and how it will likely impact their relationship.
MRT Activity Instructions:
Two participants role-play the skill by modeling the specific response style from each quadrant.
The participant playing Jackson should respond however seems appropriate after Carson responds.
After each response, the group names the box that the person responding fell into.
Active
Passive
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11. Your face is worth a thousand words…
Constructive
Destructive
Active
MRT Instructor:
Make the point that body language and expressions paint a picture as vividly as words do.
Ask participants to describe the body language, voice tone, and facial expressions associated with each style of responding.
Passive
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12. My ACR Moment What prevents me from staying in the ACR box?
What strengths help me stay in the ACR box?
Constructive
Destructive
Active
MRT Instructor:
Note: Update this slide to reflect your own ACR patterns.
Review what you recorded on the slide with the participants. Describe your style of responding with the various people you listed.
Describe the factors that prevent you from staying the ACR box (tiredness, moodiness, time urgency, etc.) and the strengths you can pull on to use ACR more often (optimism, curiosity, zest, etc.).
Make the point that ACR doesn’t mean that you can never share concerns about another person’s good news. However, you can ask yourself whether the concerns need to be pointed out immediately or whether you can first share in the positive experience and point out concerns in the next conversation.
After reviewing the slide with your information, ask for questions/comments and discuss.
Key Points:
Character Strengths can help you to stay in the ACR box (e.g., curiosity).
Passive
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13. What are your patterns?
Make a list of the key people in your life (family members, friends, colleagues, Platoon members, etc.).
Think about which box indicates the style of responding that is typical of you with that individual (consider what you say, how focused versus distracted you are, your body language, etc.).
Record each individual’s name in the box that indicates your typical way of responding with that person.
Identify factors that lead to non-AC responses, and factors that lead to ACR.
Total recommended time: 20 mins
Setup: 1 mins
Practice: 15 mins
Debrief: 4 mins
MRT Instructor:
Refer participants to the Participant Guide.
Ask participants to complete the chart just as you demonstrated on the previous slide.
After participants have completed the worksheet, ask for a few to share what they recorded and what they learned about their communication style through this activity.
MRT Activity Instructions:
Participants list the key people in their lives and think about which box indicates the style of responding that is typical of them with those individuals (MRT Participant Guide, pages 109,110)
Participants identify factors that lead to non-AC responses, as well as factors that lead to Active Constructive Responding.
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14. Make Your Praise Praiseworthy: A Special Case of Active Constructive Responding
MRT Instructor:
Introduce the skill of Effective Praise.
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15. Effective Criticism
When someone we care about fails, underperforms, or struggles, we don’t say, “Man, you are dumb as a rock.”
Effective criticism names the process, strategy, behavior that led to the problem (e.g., “You aren’t keeping your arm level.”) and how to correct it.
MRT Instructor:
Review the points on the slide.
Ask participants for examples of effective criticism they have given and have received. Ask other participants to point out what made the example shared effective criticism, as opposed to just criticism. Review three or four examples from participants.
Key Points:
Effective criticism names the process, strategy, or behavior that led to the problem and how to correct it.
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16. Effective Praise Based on work by Carol Dweck
When you recognize someone and offer praise, name the specific strategy, effort, or skill that led to the good outcome. It just takes another sentence.
Naming strategy does three things:
Demonstrates you were really watching
Demonstrates authenticity
Enables winning streaks
This is AAR at the individual level.
MRT Instructor:
Review the points on the slide.
Point out that when someone we care about succeeds or does well, we often say:
Good job!
Way to go!
Thumbs up.
We skip the process, strategy, and behavior that led to the good outcome. This type of praise does not communicate how the person brought about the positive outcome; therefore, it lacks the information that will enable them to replicate it.
Ask participants for examples of Effective Praise they have given and have received. Ask other participants to point out what made the example shared Effective Praise. Review three or four examples from participants.
Key Points:
Effective Praise names the specific strategy, effort, or skill that led to the good outcome.
Effective Praise teaches the person how they brought about the positive outcome so they can replicate it in the future.
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17. ACR and Praise Practice
Activities:
ACR Group Demonstration
ACR and Praise Partner Practice
MRT Instructor:
Describe the activities for Active Constructive Responding and Praise.
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18. ACR Group Demonstration
For each demonstration, try to model ACR and keep in mind:
Body language
Thinking of this as conversation version 1
Using Real-time Resilience to stay focused
Focus on the other person, not on yourself
Total recommended time: 25 mins
Setup: 5 mins
Practice: 10 mins
Debrief: 10 mins
MRT Instructor:
Refer participants to the Participant Guide.
Select volunteers for the role-play.
Explain that if they have concerns about what the person is sharing (in the context of the role-play), they should practice two separate conversations:
Conversation Version 1: Respond using ACR.
Conversation Version 2: Voice any concerns.
Ask participants to do Conversation Version 1 and then share whether they think Version 2 is necessary and, if so, to outline what they would say in that conversation.
Ask role-players to “freeze frame,” and ask participants to point out what the responder is doing well, using Effective Praise when naming the strategy (MRT Participant Guide, page 112).
Ask participants to point out any weaknesses, using effective criticism when giving feedback.
MRT Activity Instructions:
Two participants role-play ACR in the group.
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19. ACR and Praise Practice
Person 1 shares positive experience and Person 2 practices ACR and Praise (if Praise is appropriate).
Discuss questions at the bottom of page and record key learning to share with group.
Total recommended time: 65 mins
Setup: 5 mins
Practice: 45 mins
Debrief: 15 mins
MRT Instructor:
Refer participants to the Participant Guide.
MRT Activity Instructions:
Participants work with partners.
Person 1 shares a positive experience and Person 2 practices ACR, and then they switch roles.
Participants discuss the questions at the bottom of the worksheet (MRT Participant Guide, page 113)
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20. Debrief What was effective in using ACR and Effective Praise?
How do your strengths help and/or hinder using ACR and Effective Praise?
How do your Iceberg Beliefs help/hinder using ACR and Effective Praise?
What do you need to keep in mind when you are sharing your own positive experiences?
What do you need to keep in mind when you are responding to others’ positive experiences?
MRT Instructor:
Ask participants what they learned through this activity and record critical points on a flip chart.
Remind the participants about responsibilities they have when they are sharing good news:
Timing is important when you’re sharing your good news.
Remind the participants about responsibilities they have when they are responding to someone else’s good news:
Operate from your strengths but be modulated.
If you are in a bad mood, be transparent about it and either get in a good mood or ask to talk later (the former is better choice).
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21. Applications
What are the ways you give and receive praise in the Army (one-on-one; public acknowledgments, symbolic rewards, etc.)?
How are ACR and Effective Praise already used in the Army?
How can you further incorporate ACR and Effective Praise in the way you cultivate teams, offer recognition, or communicate about successes (with Army and family)?
MRT Instructor:
Discuss the application ideas generated by the participants.
Remind participants to record application ideas on the Applications page in the Participant Guide.
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22. Check on Learning
What is the skill? Active Constructive Responding (ACR) is a method of communication in which the responder conveys authentic interest and helps the person to relive the positive experience. Effective Praise focuses on the strategy, behavior, or process that brought the good outcome.
When do I use it? Use ACR when someone shares a positive experience with you and Praise when you want to build motivation and performance.
How do I use it? Respond to positive experiences by conveying interest and by asking questions. When giving Praise, name the behavior, strategy, or process.
MRT Instructor:
Ask each question. (Note that the slide builds.)
Check to make sure the participants are giving accurate answers.
Clarify misconceptions as necessary.
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23. Resiliency
Questions

24. AAR What went well 1. 2. 3. What can be improved MRT Instructor:
Conduct the After Action Review.
Ensure when training ends Soldiers Sound off with the motto for the quarter.
“Shoulder to Shoulder”
As of 25 Oct 10
POC: ASC MRT, DSN