1. Individual Oral Commentary
samples and grading

2. Note
Class responses on the extract and commentary are provided with the understanding that we may not have read the work in question; and therefore, the response is based on only the information provided by the sample.

3. IB comments Extract 24-line poem offers ample material
Detail from all other poems studied might be brought into discussion to support comparisons and contrasts
Shorter poems can be traps for unwary or unprepared students
In original, extract included typographical errors and guiding questions were difficult to read

4. IB comments
Questions
Neither offers any guidance as to how this particular poem might be approached
Both address technique and underplay content
Both are generic – asking about features that any poem might have

5. Sample 4 – Criterion A
2/5
Some knowledge but superficial understanding
Rightly identified but little offered by way of placing poem in context of works as whole
Context not further explored in subsequent questions

6. Sample 4 – Criterion B
3/10
Very little explanation of effects of identified techniques
Interpretation of thought and feeling are never developed
At no time is an overview attempted of what student feels poem is about
Not sustained

7. Sample 4 – Criterion C
3/10
Some evidence of structure, too brief and underdeveloped to be awarded a 4
Short and hesitant section that interprets one or two lines
None of subsequent questions enables student to build anything more in way of sustained/developed response

8. Sample 4 – Criterion D 2/5 Lack of clarity and coherence
Too many sentences and assertions remain unfinished
Vocabulary is sometimes a little vague and imprecise

9. Sample 5 Class discussion:
In your opinion, is the extract suitable for commentary? Explain.
 Are the guiding questions appropriate to the assignment? To the extract? To guide an unsure student? Explain.

10. IB comments
Extract
Slightly exceeds 40 lines, but opening and closing speeches couldn’t be cut
Appropriately line-numbered
Questions
Generic (can apply to any extract or genre)
Balance between style and content
Should offset tendency to approach Shakespeare as a reader instead of listener/spectator

11. Sample 5
Now listen carefully to the actual student commentary on the extract. Make notes as needed to be able to support the grade you will give (later).
Immediately after the extract audio, grade the commentary based on the IOC rubric.

12. Sample 5 – Criterion A
Discuss the score given and the reasoning behind it.
Compare to the actual score:

13. Sample 5 – Criterion A 3/5 Context very briefly established
To be reach level 4, needs greater sense of what happens on stage immediately before or after extract
No real connections established with remainder of play

14. Sample 5 – Criterion B
Discuss the score given and the reasoning behind it.
Compare to the actual score:

15. Sample 5 – Criterion B
7/10
Repeated reference to “reader” (effect on audience underplayed)
Use of relevant references and detail; some effective analysis
Valid and generally detailed
Good interpretation of relationship revealed in answers to subsequent questions

16. Sample 5 – Criterion C
Discuss the score given and the reasoning behind it.
Compare to the actual score:

17. Sample 5 – Criterion C
7/10
Slightly rushed and jumpy delivery; then relaxes
Well-integrated use of references
Follows largely linear approach; maintains implicit focus on characters and relationship
Repetition following lengthy pause not viewed as detraction

18. Sample 5 – Criterion D
Discuss the score given and the reasoning behind it.
Compare to the actual score:

19. Sample 5 – Criterion D
4/5
Relaxed register with no significant lapses in grammar
Clear attempt to use appropriate speech
Use of inappropriate terms (“leadee”) balanced by appropriate use of some literary terms
Desire to communicate response in varied, interesting way for listener

20. Sample 6 Class discussion:
In your opinion, is the extract suitable for commentary? Explain.
 Are the guiding questions appropriate to the assignment? To the extract? To guide an unsure student? Explain.

21. Sample 6 – Extract/Questions
Exceeds lines, but parting speech needed
Ample material for wide variety of approaches
Line numbering acts as reminder of split lines
Questions
Generic; could have more precisely focused on particular extract
Asks for content and style in interconnected way (purpose of commentary exercise)

22. Sample 6
Now listen carefully to the actual student commentary on the extract. Make notes as needed to be able to support the grade you will give (later).
Immediately after the extract audio, grade the commentary based on the IOC rubric.

23. Sample 6 – Criterion A
4/5
Good rather than excellent, thorough or precise
Correctly identified but more precise placing not offered

24. Sample 6 – Criterion A
Discuss the score given and the reasoning behind it.
Compare to the actual score:

25. Sample 6 – Criterion B
9/10
Response is firm and convincing; interpretation is valid, considered and detailed
Evident understanding and awareness of what is happening on stage and benefit of this exchange being played in front of whole court

26. Sample 6 – Criterion B
Discuss the score given and the reasoning behind it.
Compare to the actual score:

27. Sample 6 – Criterion B
Good awareness of “experimentation” of blank verse’s interrupted lines though needs more and crisper detail
Effects of caesura and enjambment need more development
Shows awareness of other literary features (metaphor, personification, and plosives) and their effects, but could have further explored these with precise evidence

28. Sample 6 – Criterion C
Discuss the score given and the reasoning behind it.
Compare to the actual score:

29. Sample 6 – Criterion C
10/10
Clear and purposeful structure with frequent structural reminders and a clear conclusion
Independent presentation of just under 13 minutes
Aim is to show significance and importance of extract of work as whole
Illustration and reference flows into discourse

30. Sample 6 – Criterion D
Discuss the score given and the reasoning behind it.
Compare to the actual score:

31. Sample 6 – Criterion D
5/5
“In spite of the frequent and sometimes distracting use of ‘um’ throughout, this is a correct, formal and lucidly delivered presentation that fulfills the criteria for level 5.”

32. Sample 7 Class discussion:
In your opinion, is the extract suitable for commentary? Explain.
 Are the guiding questions appropriate to the assignment? To the extract? To guide an unsure student? Explain.

33. IB comments
Extract
Perhaps too long, but opens and closes with Aphra Behn
Absence of line-numbering within single block of single paragraph – doesn’t facilitate nor encourage necessary detailed reference

34. IB comments Questions Balanced
Second question particularly useful guidance for students seeking to structure literary response to non-fiction

35. Sample 7
Now listen carefully to the actual student commentary on the extract. Make notes as needed to be able to support the grade you will give (later).
Immediately after the extract audio, grade the commentary based on the IOC rubric.

36. Sample 7 – Criterion A
Discuss the score given and the reasoning behind it.
Compare to the actual score:

37. Sample 7 – Criterion A 4/5 Good knowledge of appropriate context
More of an analysis of how extract is key to overall concerns of work than commentary closely focused on internal workings of extract itself
Recognizes origins but doesn’t link to internal clues or to rhetorical argument present in extract

38. Sample 7 – Criterion B
Discuss the score given and the reasoning behind it.
Compare to the actual score:

39. Sample 7 – Criterion B
4/10
Interpretation not grounded in extract itself
Literary devices remain unexplored
Little attention paid to precise details and effects
Some awareness of humor
First question perhaps encouraged student to roam too widely in consideration of women writers rather than on precise details of extract itself

40. Sample 7 – Criterion C
Discuss the score given and the reasoning behind it.
Compare to the actual score:

41. Sample 7 – Criterion C
4/10
Four areas of investigation mentioned as framework
No subsequent control over pace and direction of presentation
Digressions
Ample references to work tend to broaden response instead of support precisely

42. Sample 7 – Criterion D
Discuss the score given and the reasoning behind it.
Compare to the actual score:

43. Sample 7 – Criterion D 3/5 Talks effortlessly and volubly
Not always precision and control appropriate to and necessary for formal commentary
Style and register not consciously adopted

44. Homework:
Listen to sample 8 and grade it. You may choose to listen to sample 9 or not to (I would suggest that you do listen to it, even if you choose not to grade it).
I will give you the grades and comments for these samples next class.