1. Understanding Your Communication Style
Chapter Three
Understanding Your Communication Style

2. Chapter Preview: Understanding Your Communication Style
Style bias and its effect on interpersonal relations
Benefits of understanding communication styles
Elements of communication style model
Identifying preferred style
Style flexing
Copyright © Houghton Mifflin Company. All rights reserved.

3. Communication Style
Personality—thoughts, feelings, and actions that characterize someone
Communication style—patterns of behavior that others can observe
Communication style is
an important aspect of personality
Copyright © Houghton Mifflin Company. All rights reserved.

4. Communication Style Understanding your style….
achieve greater self-awareness
develop more effective interpersonal relations
greater sensitivity to and tolerance for others’ styles
essential for managing key relationships
self another person member of a group
Copyright © Houghton Mifflin Company. All rights reserved.

5. Fundamental Concepts Individual differences exist and are important
i.e., use of gestures, assertiveness
each person has unique style
identify by careful observation
Copyright © Houghton Mifflin Company. All rights reserved.

6. Fundamental Concepts Differences tend to be stable
Jung’s Psychological Types
born with disposition that is nurtured and strengthened over a life
Copyright © Houghton Mifflin Company. All rights reserved.

7. Fundamental Concepts Limited number of general styles
four basic styles
similar characteristics within style
Copyright © Houghton Mifflin Company. All rights reserved.

8. Fundamental Concepts A way of thinking and behaving not an ability
a preferred way of using abilities or style
Copyright © Houghton Mifflin Company. All rights reserved.

9. Fundamental Concepts
Productive relationships are developed by being in sync with others
important advantage when understanding others’
called style flexing
Copyright © Houghton Mifflin Company. All rights reserved.

10. Communication Style Bias
A common form of prejudice
More likely if the other person has a different style then yours
Often not on the same “wavelength”
Copyright © Houghton Mifflin Company. All rights reserved.

11. What You Can Do? Develop an awareness of your own style
Learn to assess the style of others
Learn when and how to adapt your own style to theirs
“Speaking the other person’s language” is essential for relationship skills
Copyright © Houghton Mifflin Company. All rights reserved.

12. Total Person Insight
By knowing our own communicating style, we get to know ourselves better. And we get along with others better as we develop the ability to recognize—and respond—to their styles.
Paul Mok and Dudley Lynch
Human Resource Development Consultants
Copyright © Houghton Mifflin Company. All rights reserved.

13. Communication Style Model
Two important dimensions of human behavior:
Dominance
Sociability
Remember: the style model describes preferences, not skills or abilities
Copyright © Houghton Mifflin Company. All rights reserved.

14. The Dominance Continuum
The tendency to display a “take-charge” attitude
an important dimension in interpersonal relationships
Everyone falls somewhere on the dominance continuum
Copyright © Houghton Mifflin Company. All rights reserved.

15. The Dominance Continuum
Figure 3.1 Dominance Continuum
• more cooperative • give advice freely
• eager to assist others • initiate demands
• less assertive • more assertive
• more willing to be controlled • seek control
Copyright © Houghton Mifflin Company. All rights reserved.

16. Determining Your Preferred Style
Step One:
Identify where you fall on the dominance continuum
Rate yourself on the Dominance Indicator Form
Ask four or five people who know you well to complete it for you
Copyright © Houghton Mifflin Company. All rights reserved.

17. I perceive myself as somewhat . . .
Figure 3.2 Dominance Indicator Form
Cooperative
Competitive
Submissive
Accommodating
Hesitant
Reserved
Authoritative
Domineering
Decisive
Outgoing
I perceive myself as somewhat . . .
Copyright © Houghton Mifflin Company. All rights reserved.

18. I perceive myself as somewhat . . .
Figure 3.2 Dominance Indicator Form (continued)
Compromising
Insistent
Cautious
Patient
Passive
Quiet
Risk taking
Hurried
Influential
Talkative
I perceive myself as somewhat . . .
Copyright © Houghton Mifflin Company. All rights reserved.

19. I perceive myself as somewhat . . .
Figure 3.2 Dominance Indicator Form (continued)
Shy
Bold
Supportive
Relaxed
Restrained
Demanding
Intense
Assertive
I perceive myself as somewhat . . .
Copyright © Houghton Mifflin Company. All rights reserved.

20. Where Should You Be? No best place to be
Successful people can be found on all points
Both ends are necessary and important at times
Copyright © Houghton Mifflin Company. All rights reserved.

21. Being Flexible Is Important
Low on dominance
more assertive temporarily to achieve an objective
learn to be responsive without giving up convictions
High on dominance
curb strong opinions and limit demands to establish cooperative relationships
Copyright © Houghton Mifflin Company. All rights reserved.

22. The Sociability Continuum
tendency to seek and enjoy social relationships
measure of whether you tend to control or express your feelings
Copyright © Houghton Mifflin Company. All rights reserved.

23. Figure 3.3 • expresses feelings • open and talkative • enjoys personal
Sociability Continuum
Source: Gerald L Manning
and Barry Reece, Selling
Today: Creating Customer
Value, Ninth Edition,
Copyright © Adapted
by permission of Prentice-Hall
Inc., Upper Saddle River, NJ.
• expresses feelings
• open and talkative
• enjoys personal
associations
• controls feelings
• more reserved
and formal
in relationships
Copyright © Houghton Mifflin Company. All rights reserved.

24. Determining Your Preferred Style
Step One:
Identify where you fall on the dominance continuum
Step Two:
Identify where you fall on the sociability continuum
Rate yourself on sociability indicator form
Ask four or five people who know you well to complete it for you
Copyright © Houghton Mifflin Company. All rights reserved.

25. I perceive myself as somewhat . . .
Figure 3.4 Sociability Indicator Form
Disciplined
Easygoing
Controlled
Serious
Methodical
Calculating
Expressive
Lighthearted
Unstructured
Spontaneous
I perceive myself as somewhat . . .
Copyright © Houghton Mifflin Company. All rights reserved.

26. I perceive myself as somewhat . . .
Figure 3.4 Sociability Indicator Form (continued)
Guarded
Open
Introverted
Aloof
Formal
Reserved
Extroverted
Friendly
Casual
Provocative
I perceive myself as somewhat . . .
Copyright © Houghton Mifflin Company. All rights reserved.

27. I perceive myself as somewhat . . .
Figure 3.4 Sociability Indicator Form (continued)
Cautious
Carefree
Conforming
Self-controlled
Restrained
Unconventional
Dramatic
Impulsive
I perceive myself as somewhat . . .
Source: Gerald L Manning and Barry Reece, Selling Today: Creating Customer Value, Ninth Edition, Copyright © Adapted by permission of Prentice-Hall Inc., Upper Saddle River, NJ.
Copyright © Houghton Mifflin Company. All rights reserved.

28. Where Should You Be? No best place to be
Successful people are everywhere along the sociability continuum
There are some commonsense guidelines to follow if you fall at either end of the continuum
Copyright © Houghton Mifflin Company. All rights reserved.

29. Being Flexible is Important
Low sociability
may need to be more expressive to avoid perception of indifference or unconcerned
High sociability
may need to curb exuberance if more formal environment is required
Copyright © Houghton Mifflin Company. All rights reserved.

30. Communication Styles Model
The model represents four communication styles:
emotive director
reflective supportive
Two factors:
dominance sociability
Model will help identify your most preferred style
Copyright © Houghton Mifflin Company. All rights reserved.

31. Figure 3.5 Figure 3.5 When the dominance and sociability
dimensions are
combined, the
framework
for communication
style classification
is established.
Source: Gerald L Manning and Barry Reece, Selling Today: Creating Customer Value, Ninth Edition, Copyright © Adapted by permission of Prentice-Hall Inc., Upper Saddle River, NJ.
Copyright © Houghton Mifflin Company. All rights reserved.

32. Figure 3.6 Figure 3.6 The emotive style combines high sociability and
high dominance.
Source: Gerald L Manning and Barry Reece, Selling Today: Creating Customer Value, Ninth Edition, Copyright © Adapted by permission of Prentice-Hall Inc., Upper Saddle River, NJ.
Copyright © Houghton Mifflin Company. All rights reserved.

33. Emotive Style Displays spontaneous, uninhibited behavior Talks rapidly
Uses lots of hand gestures
Expresses views with enthusiasm
Copyright © Houghton Mifflin Company. All rights reserved.

34. Emotive Style
Displays the personality dimension described as extroversion
Enjoys being with others
Tends to be upbeat and active
Likes informality
Uses first names
Copyright © Houghton Mifflin Company. All rights reserved.

35. Emotive Style Possesses a natural persuasiveness
Combination of high dominance and high sociability
Finds it easy to express point of view dramatically or forcefully
Copyright © Houghton Mifflin Company. All rights reserved.

36. Figure 3.7 Figure 3.7 The director style combines high dominance
and low sociability. .
Source: Gerald L Manning and Barry Reece, Selling Today: Creating Customer Value, Ninth Edition, Copyright © Adapted by permission of Prentice-Hall Inc., Upper Saddle River, NJ.
Copyright © Houghton Mifflin Company. All rights reserved.

37. Director Style Projects a serious attitude
Communicates a no-nonsense attitude
Often gives the impression he or she cannot have fun
Copyright © Houghton Mifflin Company. All rights reserved.

38. Director Style Expresses strong opinions
Uses firm gestures and tone of voice
Communicates determination
Copyright © Houghton Mifflin Company. All rights reserved.

39. Director Style May project indifference
Finds it hard to abandon formal approaches in dealing with people
Not easy to communicate warm, caring attitude
Copyright © Houghton Mifflin Company. All rights reserved.

40. Figure 3.8 Figure 3.8 The reflective style combines low dominance
and low sociability.
Source: Gerald L Manning and Barry Reece, Selling Today: Creating Customer Value, Ninth Edition, Copyright © Adapted by permission of Prentice-Hall Inc., Upper Saddle River, NJ.
Copyright © Houghton Mifflin Company. All rights reserved.

41. Reflective Style Expresses opinions in a formal, deliberate manner
Never seems to be in a hurry
Expresses measured opinions
Emotional control is a common trait
Copyright © Houghton Mifflin Company. All rights reserved.

42. Reflective Style Seems preoccupied Rather quiet
Appears aloof or hard to get to know
Copyright © Houghton Mifflin Company. All rights reserved.

43. Reflective Style Prefers orderliness Uses and appreciates an agenda
Enjoys reviewing details
Likes to make decisions slowly
Copyright © Houghton Mifflin Company. All rights reserved.

44. Figure 3.9 Figure 3.9 The supportive style combines low dominance
and high sociability.
Source: Gerald L Manning and Barry Reece, Selling Today: Creating Customer Value, Ninth Edition, Copyright © Adapted by permission of Prentice-Hall Inc., Upper Saddle River, NJ.
Copyright © Houghton Mifflin Company. All rights reserved.

45. Supportive Style Listens attentively Good listening comes naturally
Appears patient and caring
Copyright © Houghton Mifflin Company. All rights reserved.

46. Supportive Style Avoids the use of power Relies on friendly persuasion
Likes to display warmth in written and spoken communication
Copyright © Houghton Mifflin Company. All rights reserved.

47. Supportive Style
Makes and expresses decisions in a thoughtful, deliberate manner
Appears low-key in decision making
Copyright © Houghton Mifflin Company. All rights reserved.

48. Identify Yourself? Nobody conforms completely to one style
Only one dimension of personality
Only deals with behaviors that others can observe
May be able to identify the style least like yourself
Copyright © Houghton Mifflin Company. All rights reserved.

49. Variation Within Your Communication Style
Communication styles also vary in intensity
Model features zones that radiate outward from the center
These dimensions might be thought of as intensity zones
Copyright © Houghton Mifflin Company. All rights reserved.

50. Variation Within Your Communication Style
Boundary between zones not a permanent barrier
Under certain conditions, people will abandon their preferred style temporarily, a process called "style flexing"
Copyright © Houghton Mifflin Company. All rights reserved.

51. Figure 3.10 Figure 3.10 Communication Style Intensity Zones
Source: Gerald L Manning and Barry Reece, Selling Today: Creating Customer Value, Ninth Edition, Copyright © Adapted by permission of Prentice-Hall Inc., Upper Saddle River, NJ.
Copyright © Houghton Mifflin Company. All rights reserved.

52. Variation Within Your Communication Style
Zone I
Display unique behavioral characteristics with less intensity
May be more difficult to identify the preferred communication style
Not be as obvious in their gestures, tone of voice, speech patterns, or emotional expressions
Copyright © Houghton Mifflin Company. All rights reserved.

53. Variation Within Your Communication Style
Zone 2
Display behavioral characteristics with greater intensity
Can sometimes observe behavior change when upset or angry
Copyright © Houghton Mifflin Company. All rights reserved.

54. Variation Within Your Communication Style
Excess Zone
Characterized by a high degree of intensity and rigidity
Can also be labeled the "danger" zone
Often inflexible and displays a lack of versatility
Copyright © Houghton Mifflin Company. All rights reserved.

55. Variation Within Your Communication Style
Extreme intensity in any quadrant can interfere with good human relations
People may move into the excess zone when:
they are under stress or not feeling well
they feel threatened or insecure
Copyright © Houghton Mifflin Company. All rights reserved.

56. Behaviors Displayed in the Excess Zone
Supportive Style
Attempts to win approval by agreeing with everyone
Constantly seeks reassurance
Refuses to take a strong stand
Tends to apologize a great deal
Copyright © Houghton Mifflin Company. All rights reserved.

57. Behaviors Displayed in the Excess Zone
Director Style
Is determined to come out on top
Will not admit to being wrong
Appears cold and unfeeling when dealing with others
Tends to use dogmatic phrases
Copyright © Houghton Mifflin Company. All rights reserved.

58. Behaviors Displayed in the Excess Zone
Emotive Style
Tends to express highly emotional opinions
Is outspoken to the point of being offensive
Seems unwilling to listen to the views of others
Uses exaggerated gestures and facial expressions
Copyright © Houghton Mifflin Company. All rights reserved.

59. Behaviors Displayed in the Excess Zone
Reflective Style
Tends to avoid making a decision
Seems overly interested in detail
Is very stiff and formal when dealing with others
Seeks to achieve perfection
Copyright © Houghton Mifflin Company. All rights reserved.

60. Tips on Style Identification
Focus on observable behavior
The best clues are nonverbal:
Gestures
Posture
Facial expressions
Speech patterns
Copyright © Houghton Mifflin Company. All rights reserved.

61. Tips on Style Identification
Determine where the person falls on the sociability and dominance continuums
Your initial impression should not be carved in stone, but should be a continuing process
Different situations will bring out different behaviors
Copyright © Houghton Mifflin Company. All rights reserved.

62. Versatility: The Third Dimension
acting in ways that gain a social endorsement
making others feel comfortable and nondefensive
independent of style and changeable
can learn other styles
Copyright © Houghton Mifflin Company. All rights reserved.

63. Versatility and Style Flexing
deliberate attempt to change or alter style to meet the needs of another person
temporary effort to act in harmony with other communication styles
important in many occupations
Copyright © Houghton Mifflin Company. All rights reserved.

64. Total Person Insight
When we speak of interpersonal relationships (as interaction involving at least two people), we contend that no one can do much about what we say and do. And because dealing with others is such a major aspect of our lives, if we can control what we say and do to make others more comfortable, we can realistically expect our relationships to be more productive, or effective, ones.
David W. Merrill and Roger H. Reid
Authors, Personal Styles and Effective Performance
Copyright © Houghton Mifflin Company. All rights reserved.

65. Strategies for Adapting Your Style
Identify the style of the other person
Think of ways to flex your style to gain a social endorsement
Several style adaptation strategies…….
Copyright © Houghton Mifflin Company. All rights reserved.

66. Flexing to an Emotive Style
Take time to build a social as well as a business relationship
Display interest in a person’s ideas, interests, and experiences
Do not place too much emphasis on details
Maintain a fast and spontaneous pace
Copyright © Houghton Mifflin Company. All rights reserved.

67. Flexing to a Director Style
Be specific, brief, and to the point
Present the facts logically and be prepared to provide specific answers
Maintain fast and decisive pace
Project strength and confidence
Messages should be short and to the point
Copyright © Houghton Mifflin Company. All rights reserved.

68. Flexing to a Reflective Style
Be well organized
Be straightforward and direct
Be accurate and realistic when presenting information
Messages should be detailed and precise
Speak slowly and systematically
Copyright © Houghton Mifflin Company. All rights reserved.

69. Flexing to a Supportive Style
Show a sincere interest
Identify areas of common interests
Draw out other’s personal goals and views
Listen and be responsive
Do not be pushy
Put priority on relationship building
Copyright © Houghton Mifflin Company. All rights reserved.

70. Style Flexing: Pitfalls and Possibilities
If sincere and honest, style flexing can:
help build constructive relationships
be a valuable and productive communication strategy
be especially critical when something important is at stake
Copyright © Houghton Mifflin Company. All rights reserved.

71. A Word of Caution Do not label others
classify strengths and preferences, not people
Do not let your own label become rigid
Copyright © Houghton Mifflin Company. All rights reserved.

72. Strength/Weakness Paradox
There is no best communication style
each has unique strong points
People have problems when they overextend the strengths of their style
Customizing your style can require learning to overcome your strengths
Copyright © Houghton Mifflin Company. All rights reserved.

73. Summary Communication styles
patterns of behaviors, observable to others
tend to be stable throughout a person’s life
unique to each person
Copyright © Houghton Mifflin Company. All rights reserved.

74. Summary Communication style bias problem in organizations
barrier to good human relations
Copyright © Houghton Mifflin Company. All rights reserved.

75. Summary Communication Model Communication Styles Dominance Sociability
Emotive
Director
Reflective
Supportive
Copyright © Houghton Mifflin Company. All rights reserved.

76. Summary
Style flexing and versatility are important in dealing with varying communication styles
Keep an open mind about people
Don’t use labels, typecast or judge
Copyright © Houghton Mifflin Company. All rights reserved.