1. Negotiation Skills NCLVI Policy Seminar February 4, 2006 Washington, DC

2. Overview of Seminar Content Defining Negotiation Skills Defining Negotiation Skills Promoting Creative Responses Promoting Creative Responses Negotiation Questionnaire (How much do you know?) Negotiation Questionnaire (How much do you know?) Mapping Conflicts and Developing Options Mapping Conflicts and Developing Options Negotiation versus Mediation Negotiation versus Mediation Broadening Perspectives Broadening Perspectives

4. Creative Responses There are two people in a kitchen. There is only one orange left and both of them want it. What would you expect as the solution? Compromise is one option. They might cut it in half and each gets half.

5. Creative Responses Let’s assume that’s what they do. One person now goes to the juicer and starts squeezing a rather too small glass of orange juice. The other, with some difficulty, begins to grate the rind of the orange to flavor a cake.

6. A win/win approach involves: Going back to underlying needs Going back to underlying needs Recognizing individual differences Recognizing individual differences Adapting positions in light of shared information and attitudes Adapting positions in light of shared information and attitudes Attacking the problem, not the people Attacking the problem, not the people

7. Creative Responses Problems or Challenges? Problems or Challenges? Perfection versus Discovery? Perfection versus Discovery? The perfection hat says: “Is this good enough? (Usually not!) “Does this meet my impeccably high standards? The perfection hat says: “Is this good enough? (Usually not!) “Does this meet my impeccably high standards? The discovery hat says: “How fascinating! What are the possibilities here?” The discovery hat says: “How fascinating! What are the possibilities here?”

8. Negotiation Defined: Take a few minutes of discussion/dialogue to arrive at a common understanding of the term “negotiation” Take a few minutes of discussion/dialogue to arrive at a common understanding of the term “negotiation” “Negotiation involves two or more parties with competing or conflicting interests or needs, working towards an agreement on how they will cooperate.” “Negotiation involves two or more parties with competing or conflicting interests or needs, working towards an agreement on how they will cooperate.” (Tillett, 1991) (Tillett, 1991)

10. Negotiation Questionnaire Answer True or False to the following Answer True or False to the following 1. Negotiating is concerned with winning more points than the other side. 1. Negotiating is concerned with winning more points than the other side. 2. If the other party is a hard, aggressive negotiator, then we must use the same tactics in self-defense. 2. If the other party is a hard, aggressive negotiator, then we must use the same tactics in self-defense. 3. If our organization is large, we should be prepared to use our power to influence the outcome. 3. If our organization is large, we should be prepared to use our power to influence the outcome.

11. Negotiation Questionnaire (2) 4. Negotiation is about concluding a contract. 4. Negotiation is about concluding a contract. 5. It is a sign of weakness to be slow and cautious in reaching agreement. 5. It is a sign of weakness to be slow and cautious in reaching agreement. 6. People who are demanding and uncompromising make the best negotiators. 6. People who are demanding and uncompromising make the best negotiators. 7. There is nothing wrong with giving misleading information if it is going to help you get what you want from negotiations. 7. There is nothing wrong with giving misleading information if it is going to help you get what you want from negotiations.

12. Negotiations Questionnaire (3) 8. It is dangerous to allow the other party to know what you really want in a negotiation. 8. It is dangerous to allow the other party to know what you really want in a negotiation. 9. We have failed in a negotiation if we do not get exactly what we want. 9. We have failed in a negotiation if we do not get exactly what we want. 10. There can only be one winner in any negotiation. 10. There can only be one winner in any negotiation.

13. What does the questionnaire mean to you in your role? There are many styles of negotiation; one is the hard or aggressive approach that states: “more for you means less for me.” There are many styles of negotiation; one is the hard or aggressive approach that states: “more for you means less for me.” If you answered true for six or more of the statements, your adopted style is probably the “hard bargainer.” If you answered true for six or more of the statements, your adopted style is probably the “hard bargainer.” The openly aggressive negotiator reveals tough behavior & doesn’t hide intentions. The openly aggressive negotiator reveals tough behavior & doesn’t hide intentions. Others are quietly aggressive and secure their objective surreptitiously. Others are quietly aggressive and secure their objective surreptitiously.

15. 12 Conflict Resolution Skills 1. Think Win/Win 1. Think Win/Win 2. Creative responses that transform problems into creative opportunities 2. Creative responses that transform problems into creative opportunities 3. Build empathy by using active listening to clarify understanding 3. Build empathy by using active listening to clarify understanding 4. Apply assertiveness strategies to attack the problem and not the person 4. Apply assertiveness strategies to attack the problem and not the person 5. Eliminate “power over” to build “power with” others 5. Eliminate “power over” to build “power with” others

16. 12 Conflict Resolution Skills 6. Manage emotions by expressing fear, anger, hurt, and frustration wisely to effect change 6. Manage emotions by expressing fear, anger, hurt, and frustration wisely to effect change 7. Name personal issues that cloud the picture 7. Name personal issues that cloud the picture 8. Map the conflict by defining issues of common needs and concerns 8. Map the conflict by defining issues of common needs and concerns 9. Design creative solutions together 9. Design creative solutions together

17. 12 Conflict Resolution Skills 10. Plan and apply effective negotiation strategies to reach agreement 10. Plan and apply effective negotiation strategies to reach agreement 11. Help conflicting parties move towards solution through mediation 11. Help conflicting parties move towards solution through mediation 12. Broaden perspectives to evaluate problems in a broader context 12. Broaden perspectives to evaluate problems in a broader context The Conflict Resolution Network The Conflict Resolution Network Chatswood, New South Wales, Australia Chatswood, New South Wales, Australia

19. Dealing with Tricky Negotiators— How do you respond to: Exaggerated Bluff “You can’t be serious!!!” Exaggerated Bluff “You can’t be serious!!!” The Invisible Competition “Your competitor quoted lower.” The Invisible Competition “Your competitor quoted lower.” No-way Jose “It’s against our agency policy.” No-way Jose “It’s against our agency policy.” Salami (a thin slice at a time) Salami (a thin slice at a time) Deadline Dilemma (using delays and deadlines) Deadline Dilemma (using delays and deadlines)

20. Dealing with Tricky Negotiators— How do you respond to: Blowing Hot and Cold (Initial enthusiasm, sudden cooling off) Blowing Hot and Cold (Initial enthusiasm, sudden cooling off) Columbo “Just one last thing.” Columbo “Just one last thing.” Family Discounts “Look how much I’ve done for you?” (presenting concessions as a personal favor) Family Discounts “Look how much I’ve done for you?” (presenting concessions as a personal favor) “It’s none of my business but…” (complaints about your agency’s service or attitude) “It’s none of my business but…” (complaints about your agency’s service or attitude)

21. Dealing with Tricky Negotiators— How do you respond to: “I don’t have the authority.” (need to refer to the decision maker) “I don’t have the authority.” (need to refer to the decision maker) All Change (new faces, predecessor had “no authority”) All Change (new faces, predecessor had “no authority”) Raising the Roof (each concession followed by a raised demand) Raising the Roof (each concession followed by a raised demand) My Way or the Highway “And that’s my final offer!” My Way or the Highway “And that’s my final offer!” Over My Dead Body -refusal/preconditions Over My Dead Body -refusal/preconditions

23. Braham’s Negotiation Tips 1. Know Thyself 1. Know Thyself 2. Do Your Homework 2. Do Your Homework 3. Practice Double and Triple Think 3. Practice Double and Triple Think 4. Build Trust 4. Build Trust 5. Develop External Listening 5. Develop External Listening 6. Move Beyond Positions 6. Move Beyond Positions 7. Own Your Power 7. Own Your Power

24. Braham’s Negotiation Tips 8. Know Your BATNA 8. Know Your BATNA (Best Alternative To a Negotiated Agreement) (Best Alternative To a Negotiated Agreement) 9. Know What a Win Is 9. Know What a Win Is 10. Enjoy the Process 10. Enjoy the Process Barbara Braham (2004). Skills and strategies for effective Barbara Braham (2004). Skills and strategies for effective negotiation. negotiation.

26. Think of recent negotiations in which you have been involved: Buying a car, house, or appliance Buying a car, house, or appliance Negotiating a new salary Negotiating a new salary Arranging a fair division of household chores Arranging a fair division of household chores Negotiating different roles and responsibilities at work Negotiating different roles and responsibilities at work Making divorce settlements or custody arrangements Making divorce settlements or custody arrangements

27. Ask yourself the following: Why do we negotiate in these settings? Why do we negotiate in these settings? How is our style of negotiating different dependent on the situation? How is our style of negotiating different dependent on the situation? What do you think a win/win approach to negotiation would involve? What do you think a win/win approach to negotiation would involve? What is the BATNA? What is the BATNA? What is the WATNA? What is the WATNA? How does a clear idea about BATNAs and WATNAs help negotiations? How does a clear idea about BATNAs and WATNAs help negotiations?

28. Mediation Strategies 1. Clarify (the facts, the players, the positions, the issues) 1. Clarify (the facts, the players, the positions, the issues) 2. Explore Options (developed by all the players as they unfold the whole picture) 2. Explore Options (developed by all the players as they unfold the whole picture) 3. Move to the Positive (ask questions like: “What would it take to solve this problem?” “What is it that you want?” “What would make it better?” “What would make you willing?” 3. Move to the Positive (ask questions like: “What would it take to solve this problem?” “What is it that you want?” “What would make it better?” “What would make you willing?”

29. Mediation Strategies 4. Go Back to Legitimate Needs and Concerns (ask: “What do you need?” “Why is it important to you?” “Tell me why that seems the best option to you?” “Are there alternatives that would also satisfy you?”) 4. Go Back to Legitimate Needs and Concerns (ask: “What do you need?” “Why is it important to you?” “Tell me why that seems the best option to you?” “Are there alternatives that would also satisfy you?”) 5. Design options using clarifying tools, negotiating tools, and generating tools. 5. Design options using clarifying tools, negotiating tools, and generating tools.

31. Broadening Perspectives Selection Selection Is it built on a win/win approach? Is it built on a win/win approach? Does it meet many needs of all parties? Does it meet many needs of all parties? Is it feasible? Is it feasible? Is it fair? Is it fair? Does it solve the problem? Does it solve the problem? Can we settle on one option or do we need to trial several? Can we settle on one option or do we need to trial several?

32. Broadening Perspectives Implementation Implementation Are there a number of steps involved? Are there a number of steps involved? What are they? What are they? Who is responsible for each step? Who is responsible for each step? Is the responsibility shared fairly? Is the responsibility shared fairly? What is the time frame? What is the time frame? What is the review and evaluation process? What is the review and evaluation process?

33. Broadening Perspectives Agreements Agreements Are there any other relevant issues that need to be addressed? Are there any other relevant issues that need to be addressed? Do we need agreement displayed (e.g., by handshake, show of hands, or in writing)? Do we need agreement displayed (e.g., by handshake, show of hands, or in writing)?

34. “We must all learn to live together as brothers or we will perish together as fools. We are tied together in the single garment of destiny, caught in an inescapable network of mutuality. And whatever affects one directly affects all indirectly.

35. For some strategic reason, I can never be what I ought to be until you are what you ought to be.” --Martin Luther King, Jr.