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2. 2 Communicating Conflict Ma Chung University Malang, 14th February 2013 Ma Chung University Malang, 14th February 2013 Santi Djiwandono - EBA

3. 3 Conflicts happen do V V

4. 4 channel sender receiver message encoder decoder feedback communications components context

5. 5 easy to forget communication components 5

6. 6 6

7. 7 7

8. 8 external internal timing distrust easy to forget communication components 8

9. 9 Communicate with good skill & good will

10. 10 Body Language is the management of time, space, appearance, posture, gesture, vocal prosody, touch, smell, facial expression, and eye contact

11. 11 we’re wired this way

12. 12 Body Language is in the eye of the beholder warmth & authoritative leaders personal connection, affection, respect open body postures,palm up hand gestures, a full frontal body orientation, positive eye contact, synchronized movements, head nods, head tilts, smiles erect posture, command of physical space, purposeful stride, firm handshake, steepling, palm down gestures

13. 13 Body Language not all instant impressions are accurate they don’t consider context find meaning in a single gestures they don’t know the baseline evaluate through the filter of personal biases evaluate through the filter of cultural bias

14. 14 Body Language - for Leaders successful leaders don’t memorize ‘the right’ physical gestures aware that their body language dramatically impacts colleagues, clients, staff the most well-meaning behaviors will sometimes be misinterpreted ever alert to finding authentic ways to align verbal and non- verbal communication

15. 15 Listening we will become good listeners only when we can acknowledge that we have a lot to learn

16. 16 Blocks to Effective Listening competition fear judgements lack of time

17. 17 Are you really listening?

18. 18 Learn to Listen recognize non-listening behaviors focus on the speaker paraphrase know your own feelings ~if you listen you invite others to be open to you~

19. 19 How build integration & engagement communicate with good skill & good will adaptive

20. 20 Common Ground vision/enemies/sense of urgency identify learn share measure

21. 21 Authentic Leaders

22. 22 Thank you

23. 23 Reflection Questions When (time or circumstances) do you fail to listen well on the job? Think of someone in your organization who listens well. Can you describe what he or she does that leads you to fell heard? What would you do to make more time for listening at work?