1. Chapter 18: Dating, Commitment, and Marriage
Ms. Meade
Health 10

2. Dating Violence Facts
About one in 11 teens reports being a victim of physical dating violence each year.
About one in four teens reports verbal, physical, emotional, or sexual violence each year.
About one in five high school girls has been physically or sexually abused by a dating partner.

3. Did You Know?
Relationships that occur in the teen years may affect dating relationships later in life. The lessons teens learn today about respect, healthy vs. unhealthy relationships, and what is right or wrong may carry over into future relationships. Therefore it is important that teens recognize and understand what constitutes a healthy relationship.

4. Objectives Distinguish between mature love and infatuation
Identify stages of a healthy relationship
Identify steps to develop a healthy, respectful relationship
Understand dating and the health benefits of Abstinence

5. Healthy Relationships
Healthy relationships are built on a foundation of respect.
Respect is a choice, and when you give it, you are more likely to get it in return.
It is important for teens to learn how to treat others the way they want to be treated.
Teens also need to recognize that when respect is absent, their relationships may turn from healthy to unhealthy.

6. Today’s Project Create a R E S P E C T wordle http://www.wordle.net/
Design a wordle with “respect” being the main focus word, and come up with at least 10 words you associate with the word respect relative to healthy relationships.
On the back explain what being respectful in a healthy relationship means to you.

7. Characteristics of a healthy dating relationship
Mutual respect
Trust
Honesty
Compromise
Individuality
Good Communication
Anger control
Problem Solving
Fighting Fair
Understanding
Self-confidence
Being a role model

8. What is an Unhealthy Relationship?
An imbalance in which one partner tries to exercise control and power over the other through threats, emotional/verbal abuse, or physical or sexual violence
Control
Dependence
Dishonesty
Disrespect
Hostility
Intimidation
Sexual/physical violence

9. Victims of dating violence may experience
Bruises, scratches, or other injuries
Missed classes, poor grades, or avoidance of school or social events
Lying to or withdrawing from friends and/or family
Low self-esteem
Feelings of loneliness or isolation

10. Dating violence can also cause longer term problems:
Depression
Suicide attempts
Drug and alcohol abuse
Risky sexual behavior
Medical problems
Inability to succeed in school or at work later in life

11. RESPECT How do you show respect in a relationship?
Ask (talk about it)
Listen (share feelings)
Don’t judge (open communication)
Signs of Disrespect:
Bossing around
Gossiping
Making threats
Insults
Manipulation

12. Love vs. Infatuation Love: affection, attachment, devotion
Infatuation: state of being completely carried away by unreasoning passion or attraction.
Infatuation is natural but usually fades, however, it can develop into mature love

13. Mature Love and Intimacy
Mature Love: strong affection for and deep attachment to a person whose character the partner knows well
Intimacy: being very close and familiar; relationship involves very private and personal sharing; emotional connection.
This intimacy is not the same as physical sexual intimacy.

14. What makes a Healthy Relationship?
Each side of the relationship must have a positive self-image in order for it to develop into a healthy relationship.
Characteristics of a Healthy Relationship:
Mutual respect
Trust
Honesty
Support
Fairness/equality
Separate identities
Good communication

15. Healthy Relationships Develop in Stages
They cannot be rushed; you must be patient to let them grow. We are tempted to hurry it, but early on it is important to develop each stage to have a strong foundation for the healthy relationship to grow.
Stage 1: Attraction
Stage 2: Friendship
Stage 3: Close Friendship
Stage 4: Intimate Friendship
Stage 5: Mature Love

16. Compatibilities
Not only is the physical and emotional attraction important, but it important to look for other compatibilities, such as:
Sharing similar values
Does he have several close friends?
If relationship ends, would you still want to be friends?
Are you happy with the way he treats other people?
Handout 11

17. DATING
Engaging in social event designed to allow people to explore their compatibilities to get to know each other; also dating can be fun, stress free, social event
Dating Code of Conduct
Commitment
Sexual feelings teens experience are natural because of the hormones you have at this age; you can’t control that, but you can control how you respond to them.

18. Abstinence
To choose abstinence from sexual activity, you are taking responsibility for your well-being because you are avoiding
Sexually Transmitted Diseases (STDs) and
Teen Pregnancy.
Despite many external pressures, abstinence allows the teen relationship to grow and develop into healthy intimate relationships without these interruptions, which in turn reduce worry and create a feeling of freedom.

19. Marriage
The institution that joins 2 people by agreement for the purposes of creating and maintaining a family
The highest form of commitment in our society
Requires good communication, emotional maturity and sharing a life with someone who has similar values and interests.
Sharing 4 important types of intimacy: philosophical, psychological, creative and physical.

20. Dating Code of Conduct What to consider: (respect and honesty)
The appropriate age to begin dating
Do you have to give parents background info?
Tell parents exact plans?
Transportation?
Who pays? How much?
Curfew?
Can you be home alone with date?
What are the physical boundaries?