1. Helpingrajan.gupta@lanl.govhttp://t8web.lanl.gov/people/rajan/AIDS-india/ HELPING AND INTERVIEWING: DO’S AND DON’TS

2. Helpingrajan.gupta@lanl.govhttp://t8web.lanl.gov/people/rajan/AIDS-india/ OUTCRY Suicidal: attempt or gesture Running away from home May disclose it indirectly -- happening to a friend May ask how to help a friend who is being abused May discuss abuser without mentioning abuse May want to talk about home situation May leave suggestive drawings or notes to be found May complain to nurse of vague somatic symptoms Attempts at telling someone and seeking help. Seldom occur soon after the first abuse -- usually occur months/years after the first time. By this time their helplessness & depression is usually very high.

3. Helpingrajan.gupta@lanl.govhttp://t8web.lanl.gov/people/rajan/AIDS-india/ STATE OF MIND Very confused Tremendous sense of helplessness & hopelessness - nobody will believe me, understand me, or help me Very scared of what will happen to them and family Why did it have to happen to “me” Tremendous feeling of guilt Very protective of abuser, especially if very close Very concerned about future course of action

4. Helpingrajan.gupta@lanl.govhttp://t8web.lanl.gov/people/rajan/AIDS-india/ DISCLOSURE Calm yourself Make time available (if over committed ask if you can do it later or if someone else can help) Find a quiet and private place Listen calmly and patiently Support them -- do not question their integrity Reassure him/her you are concerned Reassure them it is not their fault Reassure them that no one will get punished Do not suggest what was done to them - listen IT MAY HAPPEN AT A TIME YOU LEAST EXPECT

5. Helpingrajan.gupta@lanl.govhttp://t8web.lanl.gov/people/rajan/AIDS-india/ FIND PROFESSIONAL HELP Handling and helping abuse cases is very subtle and complex. Never assume you can deal with such cases unless you have been fully trained in child abuse.

6. Helpingrajan.gupta@lanl.govhttp://t8web.lanl.gov/people/rajan/AIDS-india/ Interviewing the child: DO’s Build trust if the child does not already trusts you Conduct the interview in private Make sure you have time: don’t rush Sit next to the child, not across a table which can be intimidating to the child Reassure the child of confidentiality Use language that the child understands best Ask child to clarify words you don’t understand Don’t suggest or lead the child in their disclosure

7. Helpingrajan.gupta@lanl.govhttp://t8web.lanl.gov/people/rajan/AIDS-india/ Interviewing the child: DON’Ts Do not allow the child to feel “in trouble” or “at fault” Criticize the child’s use of words or language Suggest answers to the child Probe or press for answers the child does not want to give Display disapproval, shock, horror of parents, child or situation Force or insist that the child removes clothing Have other interviewers present

8. Helpingrajan.gupta@lanl.govhttp://t8web.lanl.gov/people/rajan/AIDS-india/ Interviewing Parents: DO’s Select interviewer(s) appropriate to the situation Conduct the interview in private Tell parent(s) up front the reason for the interview Tell parent(s) that the interview is confidential Be direct, honest, and profession Advise them of what you plan to do, and what follow up steps you will take

9. Helpingrajan.gupta@lanl.govhttp://t8web.lanl.gov/people/rajan/AIDS-india/ Interviewing Parents: DON’Ts Do not try to “prove” abuse or neglect by accusations or demands Display disapproval, anger, horror of parent(s), child, or situation Pry into family matters unrelated to the situation Place blame or make judgements about the parent(s) or child