1. Spiritual Realities: God has a purpose and design for marriage, and it has always been about more than your happiness. Marriage, yes your marriage, is meant to bring God glory.

2. Genesis 1:26-27 (ESV) 26 Then God said, “Let us make man in our image, after our likeness…... 27 So God created man in his own image, in the image of God he created him; male and female he created them.” Image: exact likeness, a visible representation.

3. Genesis 2:24 (ESV) 24 Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and they shall become one flesh. The husband-wife relationship working seamlessly together as one is meant to give a visible, tangible picture of what God is like. The odds are stacked against you if you try to succeed in your own power:

4. Psalm 127:1-2 (ESV) 1Unless the Lord builds the house, those who build it labor in vain. Unless the Lord watches over the city, the watchman stays awake in vain. 2 It is in vain that you rise up early and go late to rest, eating the bread of Anxious toil; for he gives to his beloved sleep.

5. Satan’s goal is to destroy the image of God in the world, beginning with marriage between one man and one woman. (Genesis 3) Our culture, as influenced by the god of this world, wages war on the Biblical definition of marriage. (2 Corinthians 4:4).

6. Our own flesh; our selfish, independent, defiant nature resists God’s Spirit and rule in our hearts undermining our marriage with pride, discontentment, and lustful appetites. (1 John 2:16) FLESH: Following Long Established Sinful Habits

7. Relationship Truth: “Good character is essential to a healthy relationship.” (Isaiah 36:6) ”Behold, you are trusting in Egypt, that broken reed of a staff, which will pierce the hand of any man who leans on it ….”.

8. How does one know if they have good character or if the people they are aligned with have good character?.

9. Five Character Test uestions: 1.Can I be depended upon to complete my responsibility; especially when it has become difficult, inconvenient, and seemingly unrewarding? 2.If I have a choice of a situation possibly doing better for me if I lie, but more difficult if I tell the truth, which will I likely choose?

10. 3. When a decision is being made that will impact several people, do I put the welfare of the group first or impose my own will on others for the purpose of personal benefit?

11. 4.When I am wrong, or I have done something hurtful and selfish, will I voluntarily admit my error, ask forgiveness, and correct the situation when possible; or will I avoid, deny, deflect, make excuses, blame, or even turn it back on the other person?.

12. 5. When I am asked to do something in which I have no interest, but my spouse or my children will be ecstatic about the opportunity, can I participate and genuinely enjoy their fulfillment?

13. BONUS: If I feel my spouse’s behavior is intimidating, manipulative, disrespectful, threatening, even purposefully hurtful, do I withdraw and shut down; do I lash back in similar fashion, or do I respond honestly with self control and grace? Character is demonstrated by how we carry out our responsibilities (or fail to) and our ability to be honest and loving with the people in our sphere of influence.

14. MEMORY VERSE: 2 Timothy 1:14 (NASB) “Guard, through the Holy Spirit who dwells in us, the treasure which has been entrusted to you.”

15. The security of the treasure being guarded is only as reliable as the character of the person and their ability to fulfill their responsibility. John 10:11-15 - The good shepherd - The hired hand

16. The difference in the welfare and safety of those being cared for is the character of the shepherd. The truth is, all of us have flawed characters. Isaiah 53:6

17. What can we do about our flawed characters? Be responsible for cooperating with the Holy Spirit to correct my own character and pray for, not about, my spouse. - Matthew 7:1-5 Remove the log - Psalms 139:23-24 Search me

18. The Holy Spirit of Jesus ruling in the heart of a believer is essential to genuine, lasting character change. - Genesis 5:24“walk with God” - Romans 12:2-3 not conformed but transformed - Romans 8:5-9 Spirit-filled character - 2 Cor. 6:14 Spiritual agreement

19. What if I’m already married and my spouse is not a believer, or claims to be, but God isn’t really important to them right now? - Romans 12:18, 21live peaceably, overcome evil with good - 1 Cor. 7:13-14 do not seek separation -1 Peter 3:1-2 inviting behavior

20. ASSIGNMENT: Review these notes prayerfully, meditate on the Scriptures mentioned, and record what the Holy Spirit wants you to work on to strengthen your character. Also, ask God to help you find practical ways to demonstrate that change in how you act toward your spouse.