1. REVISING A DISSERTATION FRIDAY PEER REVISIONS SESSIONS Dr. Idoia Elola, 2013

2. Revision is a reiterative process Excellent drafted dissertation Revision 2

3. Phases of revision Online revision Revise while composing a sentence or paragraph Middle revision After writing a few pages or paragraphs, do global and local revisions Final revision Revise and edit: vocabulary substitution (thesaurus techniques), reading aloud…. 3

4. Create your own revision method Problematic areas:  Poorly integrated quotes: …..These findings are supported by her own previous study (Lee, 2011b) showing that “the process of explaining, questioning, and seeking solutions to problematic features involves cognitive engagement and promotes noticing” (Lee, 2012, p. 71). [end of paragraph] 4

5. Paraphrased version Like in a previous study (Lee, 2011b), she found that the process of seeking solutions to difficult features results in cognitive activation, which promotes noticing (Lee, 2012). 5

6. Create your own revision method  Background paraphrased from other sources (e.g., in the literature review)  Read this section: While the Sears Tower is arguably the greatest achievement in skyscraper engineering so far, it's unlikely that architects and engineers have abandoned the quest for the world's tallest building. The question is: Just how high can a building go? Structural engineer William LeMessurier has designed a skyscraper nearly one-half mile high, twice as tall as the Sears Tower. And architect Robert Sobel claims that existing technology could produce a 500-story building. From Ron Bachman, "Reaching for the Sky." Dial (May 1990): 15. 6

7. 7 HOW DO I PARAPHRASE?

8. 8 Reread the original passage until you understand its full meaning. Set the original aside, and write your paraphrase on a note card. Jot down a few words below your paraphrase to remind you later how you envision using this material. Check your rendition with the original to make sure that your version accurately expresses all the essential information in a new form. Use quotation marks to identify any unique term or phraseology you have borrowed exactly from the source. Record the source (including the page) on your note card so that you can credit it easily if you decide to incorporate the material into your paper. How can I paraphrase?

9. Potential paraphrasing How much higher skyscrapers of the future will rise than the present world marvel, the Sears Tower, is unknown. However, the design of one twice as tall is already on the boards, and an architect, Robert Sobel, thinks we currently have sufficient know-how to build a skyscraper with over 500 stories (Bachman 15). Taken from https://owl.english.purdue.edu/owl/owlprint/619/ 9

10. Create your own revision method (cont.)  Lengthy stretches of analysis:  Integrate narration so the reader can follow the line of your argument.  Poorly organized:  How to tackle this problem: compare your manuscript with your previous outline.* if you did not have an outline, create an outline of what you have written so far (reversed outline) Reread and make comments about what you wrote. 10

11. How to crate a reverse outline?  Step 1  In the left-hand margin, write down the topic of each paragraph. Try to use as few words as possible (it works as quick references). When revising your own work, these notes should tell you if each paragraph is focused and clear.  Step 2  In the right-hand margin, write down how the paragraph topic advances the overall argument of the text. When revising your own work, these notes should tell you if each paragraph fits in the overall organization of your paper. You may also notice that paragraphs should be shifted after completing this step.  You should be able to summarize the topic and the manner of support quickly (from 5 to 10 words); if you can't, revise the paragraph until you can. 11

12. 12 Making comments

13. Create your own revision method (cont.) Once your chapters are complete, read each chapter again for:  random sentences in paragraphs  lack of references *  thesis and sub-thesis  supporting evidence  transitions within and between paragraphs  head titles  limited vocabulary (too much repetition)** 13

14. Needing a reference 14

15. Thesaurus techniques 15  What are common words or expressions: to provide but ….

16. Other revision considerations  Create mind-mapping: writing things down on paper, not on the computer.  Read aloud  Move forward, don’t stall  Work on reviewers’ feedback: address the comments one by one until finishing the revision Lastly,  Hire an academic editor for refined revision (when necessary) 16

17. THANK YOU 17