1. Perspectives of Parents Who Corporally Punish Their Children Elizabeth Breshears, PhD, MSW, MEd & Andrew Sorge, MSW California State University Stanislaus Social Work Social Development 2012 Stockholm Sweden 8-12 July 2012 1

2. Facts &What is known  “Isn’t that what good parents do? They discipline. I thought I was a good parent. I mean, I didn’t like being spanked, but I thought that’s the way things were done.” Leanne 2

3. Our Assumptions  I try real hard just to focus everything on them, you know, all of my decisions have them in mind before I make them. Sara 3

4.  25 of 27 received CP as children.  When I was growing up, we were spanked. And not just spanked. We were spanked! I mean like major! Yeah. So that’s what I did, and that’s what my sister did. The way that [we] disciplined …was similar to the way we were raised. Leanne Experience as Children 4

5. If they know what a comb is for… “When they start walking, my mom always said, if they know what a comb is for, then they are ready to get their little hands slapped or their little butt popped.”Adam 5 Learned from Parents

6.  “I knew that I didn’t want to do some of the same things. I wanted to meet my daughter’s dependency needs. My needs were not met in childhood.” Kathleen  “I didn’t really have anyone to look up to.. I need to be my children’s mentor.” Lynette 6

7. Don’t Smack?  I always believed that what was good for my foster children as far as discipline, was also good for my daughter. So there was never any corporal punishment for my daughter from the time that I started fostering. Kathleen  ‘Don’t hit your brother.’ Whack! What kind of mixed message was that? I never hit any of my kids after that. Toni 7

8. Conclusions about parents:  These parents care deeply … have a parenting commitment.  “We certainly don’t prepare them for the role of parenting. We don’t get a guidebook on how to do it.” Anne  “I know a great-great-grandmother who is 78 with custody of six children. She needs to be taught how to deal with these rappers. She doesn’t have a clue.” Rose 8

9. Recommendations from parents  “Programs to support parents and parent figures should be available automatically.” Rose  We must help parents think about their priorities and create a new vision but in a way that that does not ‘insult’ parents. If education is not done well, parents may ‘become extremely defensive. Miss G 9

10. Final quotes  When I am dying on my deathbed, I don’t want to have too many reasons why I need to ask for forgiveness for not being a good father. I don’t want to have to ask his forgiveness for so many things. I know that there will be some things that I will have failed. I don’t want there to be that many. Bernardo 10

11. Thank you. We invite your opinions and comments. Liz Breshears ebreshears@csustan.eduebreshears@csustan.edu 11