1. Be A Mentor, Inc. Orientation to Mentoring 1260 B Street, Suite 375 Hayward, CA 94541 (510) 795-6488

3. Training Guidelines  Maintain Confidentiality  Be here now-No cell phones  Speak from the heart  Listen from the heart  Respect differences  Refer back to training guide  HAVE FUN!!!

4. Training Objectives  To better understand the issues and environmental factors facing our youth today.  To understand the role and COMMITMENT of the mentor.  To understand and demonstrate practices of effective mentors:

5. How Youth Enter Program  Receive Orientation  Complete Application  Parents/Guardian Complete: Questionnaire Authorization Form  Youth is Interviewed

6. What is the Project Manager’s Job?  Recruit/interview Mentee  Interview Mentors  Complete Paperwork  Hold Match Meeting  Monitor the quality of match

8. Why Youth Need Mentors  Peer Pressure  Substance Abuse  Sexuality  Social Skills  Child Abuse  Family Violence  Anger Management  Absenteeism  Depression/ Suicide  Nutrition & Health  Pressure At Home  Goal Setting  Part-time Work  Failing Grades

9. From The Kid’s Eyes! Forget about what YOU think a young person needs.  Why would a young person want to be friends with you?  What does a mentee think a mentor is?

10. Youth Say a Mentor Is…  Easy to talk to  Someone to look up to  a friend  One who shows us new things  Not a parent  One who does not judge us  Understanding  FUN!  knowledgeable  One who doesn’t get mad  A role model  One who encourages us  One who listens to us  Open-minded  Empathetic  Trustworthy  One who gives guidance  One who respects us

11. Role of the Mentor  Academic Help  Goal Setting  Career Exploration Assistance  Emotional Support  Exposure to new things

12. Practices of an Effective Mentor Builds a friendship Has Fun Keeps Relationships Alive Involves Youth in Decisions Respects Youth Viewpoints Is Committed Separate Goals Confirms Appointments Allows Youth to Make Mistakes An Effective Mentor Focus on the positive

13. Pitfalls of Mentoring  Imposes Values  Sporadic Meetings  Authority Figure/Transform Youth  Demand Equal Participation  Not Seeking Support of Project Manager

14. Stages in Relationship Building Relationship Setting Goals Friendship Testing

15. Guidelines for Difficult Situations  Discuss the problem.  Think beforehand about what you want to accomplish.  Bring things up early in visit.  Separate the behavior from the person.  Stay serious but supportive.  Discuss sensitive issues in a private place.  Consider relating something personal.  Reinforce something positive about your mentee.

16. Culture  Our youth are extremely ethnically diverse.  Cultures include customs and values.  Culture is a set of mental rules for survival and success that a particular group of people has developed.

17. Culture  Cultures are multifaceted: Family structure, Spirituality, Language, Art, Parenting practices, Concept of growth, aging, & death  Goal of mentoring is to create inclusion. You feel valued and respected by me. I feel valued and respected by you.  Gang activity, not about skin color, but about which neighborhood your from.

18. Conversation Starters/Practices  Come to your mentoring time, prepared!  Any type of game, book or activity you use, should start a conversation not kill it.  Ask “High Quality Questions”  Be Careful not to use yes and no Questions.

19. Login Hours and Activities  www.beamentor.org Login Email address Password Activity Form Select a mentee Activity Date Time Comments

20. Mentor Commitment  4-6 hours each month  Weekly telephone contact  Document activities/hours  Keeps contact with parents  Attend quarterly wisdom circles  Attend mentor event’s

21. Confidentiality  When can I break it?  How do I break it?