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Family Communication How We Talk to Each Other Monday, November 5, 2007
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Goals This Afternoon Understand family and business meetings Learn how to establish a Family Council Strengthen family communication skills
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Starting Point Who has a regular, structured Board meeting? A Family Council Meeting? What does your family need to talk about?
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AMERICA “Shirtsleeves to shirtsleeves in three generations” MEXICO “Father-Merchant Son-Playboy Grandson-Peasant” ITALY “From the stables to the stars and back to the stables in three generations” CHINA “Peasant shoes to peasant shoes in three generations”
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CANADA Opportunity to learn from families around the world
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What’s the Problem?
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The Three Circles Ownership BusinessFamily
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Conflicting Purpose FAMILY Emotion based Mission: to nurture family Equality rules Permanent relationships BUSINESS Task based Mission: profitability Competency rules Temporary Resistant to change relationships Exploit change
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Governance The processes, principles, structures and relationships that help organisations realise their vision and objectives.
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Managing Complexity Three separate governance structures within one family business system: 1. Family organisation 2. Business organisation 3. Shareholder organisation
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Purpose Ownership BusinessFamily Build and continue enterprise Professionalise family culture, activities, values Recognise and resolve shareholder issues
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Starting Point Family Governance 1. Address the issues and assumptions 2. Create a family governance structure: Family Consitution Mission Statement Family Council 3. Maintain regular communication: Retreats 4. Spend quality time together 5. Monitor progress
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Complex Relationships Five people, 10 relationships
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More Complexity Nine people, 36 relationships
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Complexity in the Family System Successor asks father about retirement plans Father sees son as a threat Father criticises son’s work performance Son sees Father as out of touch Son convinced that father should retire Son talks to other family members
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Communication Skills “We do not see things as they are; we see things as we are. We do not hear things as they are, we hear them as we are.” The Talmud
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Start the Discussion UNSPOKEN SPOKEN DISCUSSIBLE
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Use Active Listening Skills Attending Inquiry Restating Acknowledging
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Speak from Your Perspective Use “I” statements State what you’ve observed Describe the impact on you Ask for what you need
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Build on Strengths What works well now? What are common values? What are areas for improvement?
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Guidelines for Family Meetings Define responsibilities How are members appointed/retire? How does the group agree? How does it relate to other entities? Length of office How decisions are recorded Must have a chairperson
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Agree how to Agree
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Types of Family Business Owner Managed Sibling Partnership Golf Tennis Football c. John Ward PhD Cousin Syndicate
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Setting up a Family Council Structure Objectives Inclusiveness
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Create Structure Schedule regular meetings Formal Agenda Rotating Chair Bring in outside expertise
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Set Objectives Become a learning family Promote family discussion Define family values, mission, vision Build trust and understanding Develop decision-making process Keep family members informed
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Be Inclusive Consider extended family Encourage participation Track attendance Ensure equal playing field
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“The best way to predict the future is to create it.” Peter Drucker
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How to Reach Us Jennifer East Founder ONIDA Coaching + Consulting Inc. 396 Brunswick Avenue, Unit 2 Toronto, Ontario, Canada M5R 2Z4 T: 416 922 8973 F: 416 922 9629 E: jennifer@onida.ca W: www.onida.ca
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