1. Saying “Yes” but Thinking “No”: Consensual Participation in Unwanted Sex Emily A. Impett and Letitia A. Peplau University of California, Los Angeles

2. Sexual Conflict Women as sexual “gatekeepers” (McCormick, Brannigan, & LaPlante, 1984) Men’s use of coercion and force (Koss & Oros, 1982) Consensual unwanted sex (O’Sullivan & Allgeier, 1998)

3. Sexual Activity and Dating Couples Sexual attraction is extremely strong Sex as symbolic way of establishing couple identity Sexual desire as a sign of love

4. Rates of Compliant Sexual Behavior 55% of women, 35% of men (Sprecher et al., 1994) 50% of women, 26% of men (O’Sullivan & Allgeier, 1996)

5. Gender and Compliant Sex “You were afraid that if you didn’t, they wouldn’t be interested in you anymore.” (Muehlenhard & Cook, 1988) “I was afraid he would stop going out with me.” (Shotland & Hunter, 1995)

6. Anxious-Ambivalent Attachment Fear separation and abandonment Preoccupied with intimacy and commitment Underestimate partners’ commitment

7. Conceptual Model Commitment Discrepancy Compliant Sex Anxious Attachment

8. Participants 243 heterosexual women currently involved in dating relationships Mean age = 21 years Mean relationship duration = 2 years, 3 months Ethnically diverse

9. Measures Own commitment (Rusbult et al., 1998,  =.90) Perceived partner commitment (Rusbult et al.,  =.89) Attachment (Hazan & Shaver, 1987) (Collins & Read, 1990,  =.76) Sexual history Consensual unwanted sex

10. Hypothetical Scenario Imagine that you are with your partner. You can tell that he really wants to be sexually intimate with you. But you just had a long, stressful day at school, and you are tired. You do not feel like engaging in sexual activity.

11. Past Experiences With your current partner, have you ever consented to engage in sexual intercourse that you did not desire? In other words, your partner wanted to have sex, you did not want to, but you freely and willingly chose to do so anyway?

12. Reasons for Unwanted Sex I was worried that if I didn’t, my partner wouldn’t be interested in me anymore. I was worried that my partner would threaten to end our relationship if I didn’t engage in intercourse.

13. Conceptual Model Anxious Attach ment Commitm ent Discrepa ncy Compliant Sex Fondl e Intercou rse Oral Sex

14. Tested Model Anxious Attach ment Commitm ent Discrepa ncy Compliant Sex Fondl e Intercou rse Oral Sex.22*.20*.21*.84*.80*.73*  2 (4) =.33, p =.99, CFI = 1.0, RMSEA <.01 *p <.05

15. Lose Interest Anxious-ambivalent42% Avoidant16% Secure18%  2 (2) = 6.54, p <.05

16. Threaten to End Relationship Anxious-ambivalent21% Avoidant12% Secure10%  2 (2) = 1.81, p >.05

17. Qualitative Analysis Anxious-ambivalent women –Fear that partner will lose interest –Worry that partner will obtain sex elsewhere Secure women –Love and intimacy –Development of desire

18. Summary Usefulness of attachment theory in understanding women’s compliant sexual behaviors Diversity of women’s motivations to be sexually intimate with a partner