1. A Private Matter Accessing Counselling Support, Issues Of Visibility And Engagement. Myira Khan Counsellor

2. Aim of today’s workshop To explore the characteristics of Private Counselling. To explore the differences between what Private Counselling and DV services/ charities can offer victims/ survivors. To explore what can be learnt from Private Counselling to move forward effectively in the provision of support services for DV victims/ survivors.

3. What are the perceptions of private counselling?

4. Characteristics of Counselling and Implications for SV/DV Survivors Abiding to an Ethical Framework Confidential Boundaries Safe Qualified professional Use of interventions Support Facilitate change Client’s needs and agenda Counsellor’s stance of non-judgement, empathy and genuineness Working within the psychological space of the counselling work and counselling relationship ‘In here’ space of counselling Independent Not mainstream Anonymous Client’s autonomy (choice and empowerment) Hidden – invisible* Engaging in conversation with only one other person*

5. Characteristics of Private Counselling: How might these characteristics of Private Counselling differ from public DV services and charities? Why might DV clients access this support before a DV service? What is the impact of invisibility upon engagement with Private Counselling and ‘public’ DV services?

6. “Many abused clients come to see a counsellor or therapist still unable to tell themselves what has happened, let alone anyone else. In my view it is of central importance that the client is not pressurized into revealing details before she is ready. She could not say ‘no’ to her abuser; she must be able to say ‘no’ to her counsellor. If she does not feel she can proceed at her own pace, and control what she reveals, she may experience a repetition of earlier abuse. This is the fine balance for the counsellor: on the one hand, she wants to be receptive and facilitative, to hear and acknowledge what is being said; on the other, she must not be invasive.” Moira Walker, Women in Therapy and Counselling.

7. How can we incorporate the qualities of Private Counselling in to DV Services? How can we work together? Independent Counsellors – not linked to agencies, parallels to the IDVA role. Informal working relationships between Private Counsellors and DV Services. Joint Working. Balance of Visibility and Engagement.

8. Myira Khan Counselling Face to face and online counselling mkcounselling@yahoo.com Find me on LinkedIn, Twitter and Facebook