1. Sample Essay
‘The Crucible’

2. What is this asking you to do?
The following question appeared in the 2002 Higher critical essay paper
Choose a play in which a character struggles with his / her conscience.
Outline briefly the reasons for the character’s dilemma and go on to discuss how successfully the dramatist engages your sympathy for him or her.
In your answer you must refer closely to the text and to at least two of characterisation, conflict, theme, resolution or any other appropriate feature.
What is this asking you to do?

3. 1)Choose a play in which a character struggles with his / her conscience.
The first part of the question allows you to decide whether the question is suitable for the text you want to write about.
Obviously, John Proctor struggles with his conscience, so this question is suitable for ‘The Crucible’.

4. 2)Outline briefly the reasons for the character’s dilemma and go on to discuss how successfully the dramatist engages your sympathy for him or her.
The second part of the question is the part which you have to actually answer.
Note the key words from the question:
‘engages your sympathy’ means the way in which the author makes us identify emotionally with a character.
‘how successfully’ means that you have to evaluate how well the author makes us feel these emotions.

5. The third part of the question gives you suggestions of aspects of the text to write about in your essay.
Note:
‘refer closely to’ means you have to quote from the play.
‘any other appropriate feature’ means you are not limited to those aspects of the text which are listed.
3) In your answer you must refer closely to the text and to at least two of characterisation, conflict, theme, resolution or any other appropriate feature.

6. 3) In your answer you must refer closely to the text and to at least two of characterisation, conflict, theme, resolution or any other appropriate feature.
Important point!
The questions in the exam no longer take the same form. Only the first two parts are present, and the third part is replaced by a general list at the start of each genre section (i.e. prose, poetry, drama) of aspects of texts which you could discuss in your essay.

7. How to use the question to write your introduction
Here is the essay’s introduction:
In the play ‘The Crucible’ by Arthur Miller, the character John Proctor struggles with his conscience. By use of characterisations, stage directions and conflict Miller engages me in this play and makes me feel sympathy for Proctor.
Note the key words from the question which are used in the introduction.

8. How to use the question to write your introduction
In the play ‘The Crucible’ by Arthur Miller, the character John Proctor struggles with his conscience.
The first part of the introduction refers to the first part of the question:
1) Choose a play in which a character struggles with his / her conscience.

9. How to use the question to write your introduction
By use of characterisations, stage directions and conflict Miller engages me in this play and makes me feel sympathy for Proctor.
The second part of the introduction refers to the second part of the question:
2) Outline briefly the reasons for the character’s dilemma and go on to discuss how successfully the dramatist engages your sympathy for him or her.

10. How to use the question to write your introduction
By use of characterisations, stage directions and conflict Miller engages me in this play and makes me feel sympathy for Proctor.
The second part of the introduction also outlines the points which will be referred to in the essay.
This helps to create a clear structure for the essay.

11. 2) Outline briefly the reasons for the character’s dilemma…
This play is based on true happenings in Salem during the mass witchhunts. It describes how Proctor has to choose between life and death, dishonesty and honesty considering all factors like how this will affect his family. By the end he has lost all his pride by admitting his affair with Abigail but still decides to choose honesty and decides not to sign to being a witch just to save his life.
The next part of the essay sums up the play, answering the first half of the second part of the question:
2) Outline briefly the reasons for the character’s dilemma…
Note that this section is brief and does not retell the whole plot of the play.

12. Conflict is a key technique used to show Proctor’s struggle
Conflict is a key technique used to show Proctor’s struggle. Throughout the play Proctor suffers from an inner conflict as he does not know whether to be honest or to save his life.
Firstly, he realises he cannot leave his wife as he truly does love her:
“I want my life”.
The topic sentence tells us what this paragraph is going to be about and refers back to the introduction.
The use of ‘firstly’ shows that several examples of conflict are going to be analysed.
The point is backed up with a quote as evidence.

13. This shows how Proctor cannot admit to being a witch but will do anything to stay with his wife and children.
Being full of pride Proctor does not want to have his name displayed on the church showing that he is a witch:
“I have given you my soul! Leave me my name!”
The essay then comments on the point made.

14. This shows his anguish at admitting he is guilty and the inner conflict is again shown by his indecision between honesty and dishonesty. This makes me pity Proctor as he is in so much distress and is struggling to make the right decision.
There is another comment made on the previous point.
The essay then gives a personal response, with explanation, showing how successfully the essay writer feels Miller has engaged sympathy for Proctor.

15. The stage directions capture the moment when Proctor becomes decisive:
“He rips up the paper”
This clearly shows Proctor realising that his conscience is telling him to choose honesty. With this choice comes more pain. Proctor has to leave his wife which he struggles to do. This moment is also effectively shown in the stage directions:
“He kisses her now with great passion”
The topic sentence again indicates what this section will be about and refers back to the introduction.
The essay writer uses evaluation to show how well Miller has created sympathy in the reader.

16. This creates sympathy not only for Proctor but for his wife Elizabeth
This creates sympathy not only for Proctor but for his wife Elizabeth. Neither of them deserve what is happening to them and I wish that Proctor would lie to keep his life even though I do not agree with dishonesty.
The essay gives a clear personal response evaluating how the dramatist’s techniques affected them at this point.
Note – you should avoid the use of first person (‘I’) in critical essays

17. Conflict between other characters and Proctor also show how he struggles with his conscience. One such example is between him and Abigail, with whom he once had an affair.
Abigail is convinced that Proctor still wants her:
“You loved me then and you do now”
Nothing Proctor says can persuade her otherwise:
“I will not be coming for you, Abi”
The next topic sentence refers back to the introduction and to the first part of the question, highlighting that the essay is on task.

18. This affair haunts Proctor later in the play when he is forced to choose between honesty and pride.
Abigail tries to seek revenge on the Proctors, especially Elizabeth:
“She is blackening my name in the village”
Proctor knows this is untrue but does not want to lose his pride and admit their affair. Once again Proctor is split between honesty to save his wife or his own pride and once again his conscience tells him to choose honesty:
“I have known her sir!, I have known her!”
The essay again refers back to the points referred to in the introduction and topic sentence, but uses ‘split between’ instead of ‘conflict’.

19. The essay analyses the techniques used and evaluates their effect.
The use of exclamation marks shows how much he is struggling to admit this and the repetition is used to show the torture he is experiencing in losing his pride. I do not feel Proctor should have to admit this as it is a mistake in his life that he feels guilty about and should not have to feel tormented about the past. The way he admits this fills me with respect for him.
The essay analyses the techniques used and evaluates their effect.

20. The clever use of characterisation developed by Miller successfully shows Proctor’s struggle and engages your sympathy for him. As a character Elizabeth is honest:
“That woman will never lie, sir”
The topic sentence includes evaluation and again refers back to the introduction and the second part of the question.

21. Remember to avoid using the first person
This causes Proctor pain as he wants to lie so he will not have to die and cause his wife pain but by lying he is going against her morals. This ironically shows Proctor’s struggle and he full heartedly receives my sympathy as I know I could not make that decision.
The essay writer analyses Miller’s technique and evaluates the effect that this has on them.
Remember to avoid using the first person

22. Proctor’s conscience gets the better of him and he asks Elizabeth to decide what he should do but she is unable to do that:
“I cannot judge you”
In my opinion this is the climax to his conscious struggle but I am glad he chose honesty in the end as it is always the best answer even if it does cause suffering to others.
For me the main theme of honesty being the best way creates sympathy for Proctor as it causes him great pain in deciding his fate and those of the ones whom he loves.
The essay contains more evaluation and personal response towards the end, and refers back to the second part of the question as it begins to sum up the essay writer’s opinion.

23. In conclusion, by use of conflict, characterisation and stage directions, Arthur Miller successfully engages my sympathy for Proctor’s struggle between honesty and dishonesty, life and death, in the play ‘The Crucible’.
The essay contains a clear conclusion which sums up the essay writer’s argument and opinion and refers back to the points outlined in the introduction which have been discussed during the essay, and to the first and second part of the question.

24. So, does it pass?

25. Intermediate 2 Performance Criteria
Understanding As appropriate to task, the response demonstrates understanding of key elements, central concerns and significant details of the text(s) Analysis The response explains in some detail ways in which aspects of structure / style / language contribute to meaning / effect / impact Evaluation The response reveals engagement with the text(s) or aspects of the text(s) and stated or implied evaluation of effectiveness, substantiated by some relevant evidence from the text(s) Expression Structure, style and language, including use of some appropriate critical terminology, are deployed to communicate meaning clearly and develop a line of thought which is generally relevant to purpose, spelling, grammar and punctuation are sufficiently accurate

26. Higher Performance Criteria
Understanding As appropriate to task, the response demonstrates secure understanding of key elements, central concerns and significant details of the text(s) Analysis The response explains accurately and in detail ways in which aspects of structure / style / language contribute to meaning / effect / impact Evaluation The response reveals clear engagement with the text(s) or aspects of the text(s) and stated or implied evaluation of effectiveness, substantiated with detailed and relevant evidence from the text(s) Expression Structure, style and language, including appropriate critical terminology, are deployed to communicate meaning clearly and develop a line of thought which is sustainedly relevant to purpose, spelling, grammar and punctuation are sufficiently accurate