1. Fostering, Maintaining, and Repairing Relationships

2. Maintaining Relationships Maintenance – actions and activities used to sustain desired relational qualities.

3. Strategies Joint Activities Attending to partner Accommodative behavior Positive Attributions Sharing Tasks

4. Strategies Humor Encourage Disclosure Avoidance

5. What are the ways in which people can repair relationships?

6. Professional Help in Maintenance – Premarital Programs Couples Communication Program Training in awareness and expression of thoughts, feelings, and intentions Training in better communication Training types of communication Training to build self-esteem

7. Premarital Programs Premarital Relationship Improvement by Maximizing Empathy and Self-Disclosure (PRIMES) Better communication (I feel…) Training in empathic responding When to switch from expressive mode to responding mode How to facilitate communication

8. Premarital Programs Premarital Relationship Enhancement Program (PREP) Learning to monitor behaviors Learning what behaviors are pleasing and displeasing to partner Making contractual agreements about changes in behavior

9. Marital Enrichment Programs Every relationship can become more satisfying Preventative measure

10. Effectiveness of Premarital and Marital Enrichment Programs In general, moderately successful The longer the program, the more successful it is Over time the benefits deteriorate PREP is good up to 5 years Sometimes damaging.

11. Psychodynamic Approaches People act out unconscious conflicts with mate Unconscious conflicts stem from events that took place in a person’s family of origin Therapeutic goal is to gain insight into conflicts

12. Rogerian People crave love and acceptance A person may create a false self to receive love Rogerian therapists help clients discover true selves through empathy and acceptance Ex: CRE program

13. Systems Approaches A focus on the individual’s differentiation from the family system Emphasis on communication Structure of relationship system Unhealthy people reflect unhealthy but stable relationship systems

14. Behavioral A distressed marriage is defined in terms of a low level of reinforcing exchanges between partners Positive behaviors must be increased Good communication and problem solving skills Contracts

15. Cognitive Addresses unrealistic expectations and causal attributions Dysfunctional expectations: 1)Disagreement is destructive. 2)Mindreading is expected. 3)Partners cannot change 4)Sex must be perfect. 5)Men and women are too different.

16. Cognitive Causal Attributions Internal vs. External Stable vs. Temporary

17. Recent Directions: EFT Emotionally Focused Therapy Based on Attachment 1) de-escalate problematic interaction cycles 2) Create emotional engagement 3) Create new interaction patterns

18. Success of Professional Help Treatment Efficacy Effectiveness studies Therapy works! No orientation is better than another Communication important Therapist’s skill important