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Of Mice and Men Of Mice and Men and Grammar “I wanna tend the ‘writing, George.”
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Writing observations Reminder: Proper formatting of quotes Quoted material four lines long or less should be integrated into the paragraph. The page number in parentheses goes after the closing quote mark. The period goes after the page number, outside the parentheses. Example: After painting a terrifying picture for Lennie of life without George – who Lennie travels with, idolizes, and loves – Crooks turns his harsh words inward, saying about his own lonely life that, “A guy needs somebody – to be near him. A guy goes nuts if he ain’t got nobody” (72).
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Writing observations Reminder: Write in present tense: Original: George and Lennie had more than just a friendship; they were different than any other ranch workers. Your correction should look like this: George and Lennie have more than just a friendship; they are different than any other ranch workers.
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Writing observations Reminder: Write in third person First-person example: Friendship can teach us some strange but meaningful lessons. Solution: Simply remove “us.” Friendship can teach some strange but meaningful lessons. Friendship can teach some strange but meaningful lessons. Second person example: There are many different themes that you can infer from the book “Of Mice and Men” by John Steinbeck. Many themes can be inferred from John Steinbeck’s novel “Of Mice and Men.”
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Writing observations Miscellaneous continued Spelling Curley (with an “e”); Curley’s wife (lowercase “w”); Lennie (“ie” not “y”); definitely (not defiantly); woman (not women)
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Writing observations Spelling Crooks; not Cooks, Crucks John Steinbeck; not John Steinaback, John Stinebeck, John Stainback, John Stienback. woman = singular; women = plural definitely (not defiantly
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Writing observations Review: Comma splices A comma splice occurs when you use only a comma to separate two complete sentences (independent clauses) that make up one sentence. Lennie is very childlike in his mind, he also can’t control his own strength.
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Writing observations Other punctuation matters The “cousin” to the comma splice: Making sure you include a comma when you have two independent clauses connected by a conjunction. Crooks is not talked to and he spends most of his time alone. Crooks is not talked to, and he spends most of his time alone. George yells at Lennie and he says all the time how easier life would be without Lennie. George yells at Lennie, and he says all the time how easier life would be without Lennie.
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Parallel structure When we talk about parallel structure, we're dealing with a balancing act. The idea isn't too hard, but most people don't think about it. So what are we balancing?... pairs of words or series of words. Look at the following:
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Parallel structure Pairs a and b a or b Series a, b, and c a, b, or c Think of the letters as standing for words or groups of words. Any words or groups of words that you plug in have to be the same kinds of words or word patterns. That's all there is to it! Let's see how the "formula" works:
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Parallel structure Pairs: running and jumping, bothered and bewildered, open or shut, laughing or crying (all are verbs) Series: broken, bedraggled, and bone-tired (all are adjectives) an old shoe, a stuffed bear, and a chewed-up blanket (all are nouns) When you write your sentences using parallel structure, your ideas come across more clearly because they're easier to read. Compare the following sentences: Peggotty's toys were an old shoe, a bear that was stuffed, and she had chewed up an old blanket. Peggotty's toys were an old shoe, a stuffed bear, and a chewed-up blanket. See how the second sentence is smoother and more balanced? Adapted from “Big Dog’s Grammar” http://aliscot.com/bigdog/parallel.htm
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Clutter Clutter This quoted passage from the novel gives the reader a brief glimpse at the loneliness eating away at Crooks. This passage offers a brief glimpse at the loneliness eating away at Crooks. George realizes that being lonely would be something definitely not desirable. George realizes that loneliness is definitely undesirable. A victim of loneliness is a character named Candy. Candy is a victim of loneliness.
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Pronouns-antecedents Unclear pronoun-antecedent reference/agreement Also, the common loneliness of all protrudes when people find out that Lennie and George travel together and react with surprise and secret jealousy. Also, common loneliness is evident when people react with jealousy and surprise upon discovering George and Lennie travel together. When Lennie walks into the room one night when all the other men are away, Crooks tells him how truly lonely and sad his life is. When Lennie walks into the room one night when all the other men are away, Crooks reveals how truly lonely and sad Crooks’ life is. George leaves Lennie behind to play with his puppy. George leaves Lennie behind to play with the puppy Slim gave Lennie.
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