1. Chuck Norris Fact: “It takes Chuck Norris 20 minutes to watch 60 Minutes.”

2. The British Empire Ba nuh…ba nuh…ba nuh

3. How Did England Get So Bloody Fabulous?  Industrial Revolution  No major political problems in England  No wars fought on English soil

4. What’s Wrong with the Rest of Europe?  France, Germany, Italy, Austria, Spain, Russia & the Netherlands are all dealing with some sort of Revolution  As a result, they are all in no place to challenge England

5. God Save the Queen  Queen Victoria  Reigned from 1837-1901  Lead England to its height of power and success  England became ENGLAND while she was queen  Fun Fact: Victoria wore black every day after her husband died…that was for 40 years  Obvious Fact: The Victorian Era in English history is named after her In all honesty…black is more slimming…sorr y Alby.

6. Rock the Vote…British Style Which means doing it with bad teeth  The Reform Bill of 1832 begins the slow process for suffrage  Over about 75 years the percentage of voters went from 5% to 74%  Result: British people are happier

7. How to Dominate the World  England begins to create Dominions  These places are similar to colonies, but have more freedom  They give England a presence around the world  They help to make England rich & powerful Lasers! You need frickin’ lasers!

8. Canada, Eh  The British have owned Canada for a long time  Canada was established with two provinces  Upper (English)  Lower (French)  In 1839, Lord Durham reunited Canada  British Immigration increased and Canada became a Dominion Believe it or not…this is the REAL Canadian Flag

9. Everything’s Better Down Under England has a Penal System in Australia starting in 1788 A Penal Colony is a place to send criminals subliminal message DON’T GO TO AUSTRALIA…They Are All CRIMINALS…AAAHHHHHHHHHHHH John MacArthur discovers the value of Sheep Herding Australia is suddenly profitable Australia becomes a Dominion I just crapped my pants

10. Where is New Zealand?  New Zealand is near Australia  They have Hobbits there, or so I’ve heard  New Zealand was first inhabited by Maoris, Escaped Convicts and Missionaries  Problems arose  England annexed New Zealand and it too became a Dominion I need a pedicur e That guy looks like me…weird One eyed Willie? I feel out of focus

11. Ireland Gets Unlucky  This is a different situation than the others  Irish vs. English  English use political & religious issues to control the Irish  Irish suffer the potato famine  Ireland struggles with England well into the 1900’s I can’t quite see…can someone help me get my glasses out of my butt?

12. South Africa  British vs. Dutch  British win the Boer War  Diamonds & Gold  This is also a prime location  South Africa becomes a dominion

13. Egypt & the Suez Canal  Egyptians are building the Suez Canal to connect the Mediterranean with the Indian Ocean  The British cannot allow this to escape them  Egypt becomes a dominion

14. India: The Jewel of the Crown  India is great for Tea and Opium  The Raj: 1757 – 1947  India is another prime location for trade & the ability to make money  India is a dominion

15. The British in India  Helped India unite  Helped India Modernize  Racism caused constant trouble  Religious implications  Sepoy Mutiny The Good The Not So Good

16. Britain’s Effect on the World  Showed other European nations a new way to make money in the Industrial Age  This will lead to all the nations of Europe pushing for Imperialism

17. Moment of Zen No wait! I know this hot squirrel with these odd…aaahhhh!