1. Essay writing & Writing about film Part 2 (THE RETURN) Brought to you by Mr. Miller

2. Essay writing & Writing about film First things first… ESSAY RALLY MONKEY!

3. Essay writing & Writing about film “Explore how perceptions of belonging and not belonging can be influenced by connections to places. Refer to the text Rabbit-Proof Fence in your response.” Mr. Miller’s Practice Essay : Reading Directions -Read the opening paragraph: underline the thesis statement, circle the context/summary. - Read through one body paragraph and underline any place where you see DETAILS from the film. * What should come immediately after any details that are used in the body paragraph?

4. Essay writing & Writing about film “Explore how perceptions of belonging and not belonging can be influenced by connections to places. Refer to the text Rabbit-Proof Fence in your response.” Basic structure of a body paragraph 1)Topic sentence (The WHY - Connects back to thesis) 2)Description / context / summary 3)Details from text (dialogue, description) 4)Analysis of details (HOW the details support your idea in the topic sentence and thesis). 5)*Repeat steps 2 through 3 or CONCLUDE

5. Essay writing & Writing about film – Mr. Miller Essay (LEAD SENTENCE) Home is where one perceives it to be—a person who feels at home in a village of dusty huts would feel out of place at an air-conditioned mansion. A dusty village could be Paris or Bali, or simply a place where one belongs. (CONTEXT / SUMMARY) The film ‘Rabbit Proof-Fence’, directed by Phillip Noyce, explores the connection between one’s perception of place and one’s identity through the eyes of three Aborigine children who are removed from their family as part of the ‘Stolen Generation’ in 1930’s Australia. The film follows Molly, the oldest of the three, who senses hostility and oppression at Moore River Settlement, the camp that she and her sisters are taken to for training as domestic servants. (2 Part THESIS) With skillful narrative, the film contrasts Molly’s negative perception of the settlement with the affirming connections she feels towards her native home and her family. Molly’s refusal to perceive Moore River as ‘home’ compels her to escape from the settlement and lead her sister and cousin 1200 miles back to Jigalong—her true place of belonging.

6. Essay writing & Writing about film As the day unfolds, Molly senses the rigidity of the rules and the hostility towards those who disobey them. At mealtime, all of the girls recite a memorized prayer before sitting down to eat a soggy breakfast with plates and silverware. When Molly’s sister Daisy talks to Molly in her native Mardu language, (perhaps commenting on the strange food) she is scolded by a mean-looking caretaker who barks, “We won’t have that wanka here. You speak English! Now Eat!” Even though Molly willingly speaks English earlier in the film, she perceives undue hostility in the caretaker’s command to speak English only, without the option of speaking in her native language.

7. Essay writing & Writing about film TOPIC SENTENCE: Exploring a new environment from Molly’s point of view, the film uses detail after detail to portray Moore River Settlement as a place of hostility, rules and subtle oppression. LATER IN THE PARAGRAPH: When Molly’s sister Daisy talks to Molly in her native Mardu language, (perhaps commenting on the strange food) she is scolded by a mean-looking caretaker who barks, “We won’t have that wanka here. You speak English! Now Eat!” Even though Molly willingly speaks English earlier in the film, she perceives undue hostility in the caretaker’s command to speak English only, without the option of speaking in her native language.

8. Essay writing & Writing about film To help you remember the structure of body paragraphs, -Think of a hamburger! TOP BUN Topic Sentence (Part of Thesis) LETTUCE/TOMATO Context (Who, where, when, how?) CHEESE Details & Evidence (Quoted or Paraphrased) BEEF Analysis (Pull details / connect back to main idea you are arguing in thesis.) BOTTOM BUN Conclude OR Give Context for NEW EVIDENCE

9. Essay writing & Writing about film To help you remember the structure of body paragraphs, -Think of a hamburger! Guided Practice -With your Essay Reading Partner, select one of the body paragraphs in Mr. Miller’s Essay and add another layer to the hamburger. -Select another piece of evidence/details from the film, introduce it through context or description and then analyze it in a way that presents the idea of the paragraph.

10. Essay writing & Writing about film - Good work on your practice essays! Common Errors / Areas of Concern - Not describing your ideas or details from the film so that the reader can understand them. - Losing focus throughout body paragraphs. - Literal summary, (i.e. the camera shot of Molly’s terrified face shows us how concerned she is.) - Forgetting to mention ‘place’ or ‘perception’ in your analysis. - Neglecting to give context ‘Who, what, when, where’ we are in the story.

11. Essay writing & Writing about film Also… - It is okay to use simple sentence clauses (subject with a strong descriptive verb) rather than complex sentences. *Your thesis statement can be more than one sentence. -Use strong details from the film that you can use as examples of meaningful film techniques (like the scene when the girls are taken by Constable Riggs). - Don’t re-interpret the film (i.e. even though Molly had a ‘good time’ at Moore River… Above All - Give us details from the film and be as accurate as you can! If you mention Mr. Neville, tell us what his position was…

12. Essay writing & Writing about film Countdown to the In-Class Essay… -Take out your revised opening paragraph and body paragraph. -Read it to out loud to a partner, (don’t show it to them). -As you listen to your partner’s revision, I want you to select one or two sentences that sound logical or well-written. Tell your partner when you hear that sentence – point it out to them. -I also want you to select one thought or sentence that sound illogical or mistaken. Point that out to the reader. -Reader circle those two sentences.

13. Essay writing & Writing about film In-Class Essay Writing – Things to be aware of - Using ‘quotes’ around a word means that you, the writer, question the validity of that word. For example: Mr Neville is the chief ‘protector’ of aborigines – you imply that he’s not really a protector in a positive sense. - Using camera terms correctly (Example: close-up versus long shot) - Choose details that are strong and vivid. Details that show belonging. If you are using dialogue, try and use it accurately: Nina says, “No one got Mothers here,” Molly replies, “I got Mother.” - What does that piece of dialogue reveal?

14. Essay writing & Writing about film Final advice for the in-class - Think while you write *Make an outline before* -Quality over quantity. - Don’t try and write four body paragraphs; if you write three or even two well-structured paragraphs with good details, that attests more strongly to your writing ability. - Think of details and moments from the film that are strong, clear examples of film technique that show meaning. - Don’t forget to analyze your details. Go deeper with a few details, rather than loading many details. - Think of Molly and what she goes through or experiences. What film techniques and scenes show us her P.O.V.? - Remember the structure of a paragraph – details / analysis

15. Essay writing & Writing about film Essay Scrimmage! - For the next ten minutes write a body paragraph with the following objective: Select a scene from the second part of the film when Molly, Gracie are travelling through the desert. How do two details from the scene show Molly’s strength of character? What film or narrative techniques convey this strength? Structure your paragraph (Topic sentence, description, detail, analysis, repeat.)