1. Bringing the Best Out of People
Presented by:
Dr. Adrienne Pasek
Introductions before slide 2

2. Outline of the day Navigating emotions
Perceptions, feelings, absolutes
Communication
Ten Commandments for resolving conflict
Neutrality
Techniques for disagreeing without taking a position
Negotiating
Finding common ground
Average 15 minutes per topic
Group work 20 minutes Last slide and questions 15 minutes

3. Navigating Emotions Perceptions Feelings Absolutes
Responding to an Angry Person paper

4. ABSOLUTES Things will happen that you cannot control
You cannot change that which is out of your control
The only change you can make is within yourself and

5. Perceptions Reality is just a perception
Perception is a combination of beliefs, values, experiences
Purple horses

6. SCHEMAS
Underlying cognitive structures and rules that consist of core beliefs and that determine how we codify, categorize, interpret experiences
Develop early in life
Beck, (1967, 1984)

7. DYSFUNCTIONAL SCHEMAS
impair reality and the ability to think reasonably

8. Six Universal Feelings
Anger
Disgust
Fear
Happiness
Sadness
Surprise
Anger: unmet expectations, Disgust: undesired expectations, Fear: scary expectations, Happiness: met expectations, Sadness: loss of expectations, Surprise: unexpected expectations

9. Communication Speaking Listening Conveys meaning +
Interpretation of what was heard
Before we begin talking about communication, body language, let’s talk about some situations

10. Communication Research
7% of meaning is derived from the spoken word
38% of meaning is paralinguistic (the way the words are spoken)
55% of meaning is derived from facial expression

11. Rules of Engagement What is the purpose of the message?
(Why do I need to know this?)
informational, educational, personal
What do you need me to feel?
(universal feelings)

12. More Rules of Engagement
Behavior is an outward expression of feelings/thoughts/perceptions

13. Neutrality Techniques Tactics Strategies
Keeping a frame, paraphrasing, breathe,
Break into groups

14. Negotiation Finding Common Ground Sandbox 101
11:50 What you learned in Kindergarten, politeness, respect, caring