1. Part 5
I Want a Good Marriage
Malachi 2:13-16

3. Strife with my spouse causes strife with my God (2:13-14)
Another thing you do: You flood the LORD’s altar with tears. You weep and wail because he no longer pays attention to your offerings or accepts them with pleasure from your hands.

4. Strife with my spouse causes strife with my God (2:13-14)
You ask, “Why?” It is because the LORD is acting as the witness between you and the wife of your youth, because you have broken faith with her, though she is your partner, the wife of your marriage covenant.

5. Strife with my spouse causes strife with my God (2:13-14)
All sorrow is not beneficial (2:13a-c)
Three things they did that did not work:
You flood the LORD’s altar with tears
You weep
You wail

6. Strife with my spouse causes strife with my God (2:13-14)
God is not paying attention and He is not pleased (2:13d-e)
…he no longer pays attention to your offerings or accepts them with pleasure from your hands

7. Strife with my spouse causes strife with my God (2:13-14)
God does what He does for a reason
You ask, “Why?” It is because the LORD is acting as the witness between you and the wife of your youth, because you have broken faith with her, though she is your partner, the wife of your marriage covenant. (2:14)

8. Strife with my spouse causes strife with my God (2:13-14)
Three titles of a wife to describe the relationship between a husband and a wife that God desired:
Wife of your youth
Your Partner
Wife of your marriage covenant

9. Strife with my spouse causes strife with my God (2:13-14)
There were two motives for violating the marriage: or “breaking faith”.
Money!
Sex!

10. My marriage relationship is Gods idea
Has not the LORD made them one? In flesh and spirit they are his. And why one? Because he was seeking godly offspring. (2:15)

11. My marriage relationship is Gods idea
Marriage was created by God for His purpose.
“In the beginning, God created the heavens and the earth. Now the earth was formless and empty, darkness covered the surface of the watery depths, and the Spirit of God was hovering over the surface of the waters.” (Genesis 1:1-2)

12. My marriage relationship is Gods idea
Marriage was created by God for His purpose.
“Be fruitful, multiply, fill the earth…” (Genesis 1:27)

13. My marriage relationship is Gods idea
Has not the LORD made them one? In flesh and spirit they are his. And why one? Because he was seeking godly offspring. (2:15)
The point is your marriage is not about you! It was created by God for His purpose!

14. Bottom Line:
God is serious about me staying in my marriage So guard yourself in your spirit, and do not break faith with the wife of your youth.

15. Guard your spirit…
Live the secret of contentment: God calls you to something… not from something!

16. Three Observations on Contentment
Contentment is within the POWER of CHOICE.
"I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances." (Philippians 4:11)

17. Three Observations on Contentment
Contentment has nothing to do with POSSESSIONS.
"Though the fig tree should not blossom,
And there be no fruit on the vines,
Though the yield of the olive should fail,
And the fields produce no food,

18. Three Observations on Contentment
Contentment has nothing to do with POSSESSIONS.
Though the flock should be cut off from the fold,
And there be no cattle in the stalls,
Yet I will exult in the Lord,
I will rejoice in the God of my salvation (Habakkuk 3:17-18)

19. Three Observations on Contentment
Contentment increases when my TIME WITH GOD increases.
"I envied the arrogant when I saw the prosperity of the wicked.
They have no struggles; their bodies are healthy and strong.

20. Three Observations on Contentment
Contentment increases when my TIME WITH GOD increases.
They are free from the burdens common to man; they are not plagued by human ills.
All day long I have been plagued;
I have been punished every morning.

21. Three Observations on Contentment
Contentment increases when my TIME WITH GOD increases.
When I tried to understand all this,
it was oppressive to me till I entered the sanctuary of God;
then I understood their final destiny. " (Psalm 73:3-5; 13-14; 16-17)

22. Three Things to Watch Out For
SELF-PITY - takes the joy out of a relationship.
BLAME- focus on what is wrong; not on who is wrong.
RESENTMENT - even if directed to someone other than a spouse, is always detrimental to a marriage.

23. Do not “break faith…” Keep clean!
“I hate divorce,” says the LORD God of Israel, “and I hate a man’s covering himself with violence as well as with his garment,” says the LORD Almighty.
So guard yourself in your spirit, and do not break faith.

24. Keep clean! Abuse is a violation of your marriage covenant.
Learn to handle conflict!
The number one predictor of divorce is the habitual avoidance of conflict.

25. How to deal with tense moments:
Don't Run - Repressed irritations have a high rate of resurrection.
Choose Your Battles Carefully - learn what can and should be changed.
Define the Issue Clearly - Ask yourself these questions:
What are we really arguing about?

26. How to deal with tense moments:
What is the real source of our disagreement?
State Your Feelings Directly - Practice the X, Y, Z Formula
"In situation X, when you do Y, I feel Z"
Rate the Intensity of Your Feelings

27. How to deal with tense moments:
Give Up Put-Downs- Too often we are more polite to acquaintances t an we are to our mates.
Don't Dwell on Downers - try to end the fight and end the fight.