1. “… But be transformed by the renewal of your mind… Romans 12:2 STRATEGIC PASTORAL COUNSELING FOR THE SEXUALLY ADDICTED ‘FROM CHAINS TO CHANGE.’

2. WHAT IS SEXUAL ADDICTION? OVERVIEW: A PROGRESSIVE INITIMACY DISORDER: COMPULSIVE SEXUAL ACTS AND THOUGHTS. THE NATIONAL COUNCIL ON SEXUAL ADDICTION & COMPULSIVITY DEFINES IT: (1) “PERSISTENT/ESCALATING PATTERNS OF SEXUAL BEHAVIOR;” (2) “BEHAVIOR ACTED OUT DESPITE NEGATIVE CONSEUQENCES.”

3. SEXUALLY ADDICTED TRAITS SOME ADDICTS DO NOT… PROGRESS BEYOND COMPULSIVE MASTURABATION, PORNOGRAPHY, OR PHONE/COMPUTER SEX SOME ADDICTS ARE INVOLVED ILLEGALLY: 1. EXHIBITIONISM 2. VOYEREURISM 3. OBSENCE CALLS 4. CHILD MOLESTATION 5. RAPE

5. STATISTICS…. 55%-CONVICTED SEX OFFENDERS- CONSIDERED ADDICTS 71% OF CHILD MOLESTERS- CONSIDERED ADDICTS 42% OF PEOPLE SEEK 1 ST SPIRITUAL HELP Problem Areas: Marital Legal Financial Psychological Social Health

6. THE ADDICTION CYCLE FOUR STEPS: 1. PREOCCUPATION 2. RITUALIZATION 3. COMPULSIVE SEXUAL BEHAVIOR 4. DESPAIR (LACK OF HOPE/POWER)

7. SEXUAL ADDICTION THE CRITERION:

8. PROGRESSION ADDICTION PROGRESSES BY: 1. WIDELY PRACTICED SOCIAL BEHAVIORS. 2. SLIGHT ILLEGAL ACTIVITIES- (VOYEREURISM, OBSENCE CALLS, ETC) 3. VIOLENT ACTIVITIES- (RAPE, INCEST, CHILD MOLESTATION)

9. COUNSELING APPROACH BIBLICAL & EXPLICITLY CHRISTIAN SPIRITUALLY FOCUSED HOLISTIC STRATEGIC BRIEF & TIME LIMITED

10. THE ENCOUNTER: Stage 1. 1.INITIAL MEETING (Empathy, Respect, Authenticity) 2.JOINING & BOUNDARY SETTING 3.PASTORAL DIAGNOSIS 4. PRIMARY FOCUS 2.

11. STAGE #2- ENGAGEMENT. EXPLORING FEELINGS: Shame Guilt Nervousness Denial Hopelessness Fear Loneliness Feeling Unloved, etc.

12. ENGAGEMENT- Session 2. EXPLORING THOUGHTS: Insecurity Poor Self Worth Abuse Anger Violence Hurt Dysfunctionalism REINTERPRETATION Security Value Wholeness Joy Peace Life Healing Owning Emotions

13. ENGAGEMENT- Session 3 BEHAVIORAL PLAN: 1. CONCRETE 2. SPECIFIC 3. REALISTIC 4. ATTAINABLE

14. KNOW THE BIBLICAL MANDATES: GENESIS 2: 21-25 LEVITICUS 20: 7-24 ROMANS 12: 1-3 1 PETER 1: 3-16 HEBREWS 12: 14-15

15. PLAN A BIBLICAL RESPONSE 1. OBTAIN THE BIBLICAL PERSPECTIVE ABOUT THE SITUATION. 2. WRITE THE PERSPECTIVE DOWN. 3. MEMORIZE IT. 4. PRACTICE IT.

16. DISENGAGEMENT, STAGE 3 I. EVALUATE PROGRESS /CONCERNS: Review what was learned Identify Anticipated Difficulties Identify coping skills/mechanisms Know Referral Sources II. DISCUSS RESOURCES/REFERRAL III. TERMINATE COUNSELING

17. REFERRAL SOURCES CULTIVATING PURITY (Insight for Living) CARE LINE: (972)-473-5097 PURE INTIMACY- 800 A-FAMILY (232-6459) EVERY MAN’S BATTLE NEW LIFE MINISTRIES-800- 639-5433 NATIONAL COUNCIL SEXUAL ADDICTION & COMPULSIVITY- 770-541-9912

18. BIBLIOGRAPHY Benner, David G. Strategic Pastoral Counseling. A Short Term Structural Model. Michigan: Baker Academic, 2003. Herkov, Michael, PHD. “What is Sexual Addiction.” Psych Central. http://psychcentral.com/lib/what-is- sexual-addiction (accessed December 17, 2013).http://psychcentral.com/lib/what-is- sexual-addiction A Biblical Perspective on Caring for People, Insight for Living Counseling Insights