1. VAN Forum Understanding End of Life Options: Getting to the Heart of the Matter Lenox Community Center October 12, 2010

2. “We all want to be remembered and everyone leaves something behind” Seniab © Barry K. Baines, M.D. 2004-2010

3. “What I hear, I forget What I see, I remember What I do, I understand” Lao-tse

4. Goals – I hope you will be able to: Describe what an ethical will is Understand how ethical wills create a spiritual legacy Commit to learning more Discover resources to help you complete your ethical will

5. Examples of Ethical Wills nWhat did you like? nWhat stayed with you? © Barry K. Baines, M.D. 9/2004

6. What Is An Ethical Will? A vehicle to define and pass on our: –values –beliefs –faith –life’s lessons –dreams/hopes for the future –love –forgiveness to family, friends, and community © Barry K. Baines, M.D. 2004-2010

7. History Of Ethical Wills nBiblical roots nRelation to wills of inheritance and living wills (advance care plans) nCurrent revival links the ethical will to turning points in people’s lives © Barry K. Baines, M.D. 2004-2010

8. Why Write An Ethical Will? nIs it a biological imperative? nIs it hard-wired into the human psyche? © Barry K. Baines, M.D. 2004-2010

9. Why Write An Ethical Will? nHonor the past –by remembering family/community history and connecting to our roots nCapture the present –by identifying what we value most nInform the future –by creating a ‘legacy of the spirit’ “Honor the Past, Capture the Present, Inform the Future” is reprinted with permission from: Anita Hecht, LCSW Director, Life History Services, LLC www.lifehistoryservices.com © Barry K. Baines, M.D. 9/2004

10. Why Write An Ethical Will? nIf you don’t tell your stories and the stories of those from whom you come, no one else will and they will disappear nLets you reflect and reframe life experiences, and enjoy your achievements nIt’s good for your health! © Barry K. Baines, M.D. 9/2004

11. When Might You Write an Ethical Will? nFacing or experiencing a challenging event or life situation nGoing through a transition or turning point © Barry K. Baines, M.D. 9/2004

13. When Might You Write an Ethical Will? nUpcoming surgery nLoss or illness nBirth of a grandchild nNational or global disaster © Barry K. Baines, M.D.2004-2010

14. When Might You Write An Ethical Will? nBetrothed Couples nExpectant and new parents nGrowing Families nEmpty Nesters © Barry K. Baines, M.D.2004-2010

15. When Might You Write An Ethical Will? nMiddle age and beyond –Harvesting life experience –Converting experience into wisdom –Fulfill the responsibility of passing this wisdom on to future generations © Barry K. Baines, M.D. 2004-2010

16. When Might You Write An Ethical Will? nApproaching the end of life –Addresses our transcendent dimension - that we are a part of something larger then ourselves or our lifetimes –Transmits a message of hope for future generations © Barry K. Baines, M.D. 2004-2010 © Barry K. Baines, M.D. 9/2004

17. How to Write an Ethical Will: Three Approaches nBeginning with an outline and a list of suggestions nBeginning with structured exercises nBeginning with a blank sheet of paper © Barry K. Baines, M.D. 9/2004

19. Remember: Writing an Ethical Will Results in: nOpportunities for personal growth and meaning nA tangible connection from one generation to another nPotential enrichment of family relationships nA cherished “gift of self”--the value of which can’t be quantified © Barry K. Baines, M.D. 2004-2010

20. Next Steps nDecide on the best approach for you nSelect appropriate resources nDevelop a personal plan nConsider forming a ‘legacy circle’ and work with others © Barry K. Baines, M.D. 2004-2010 © Barry K. Baines, M.D. 9/2004

21. Q&A Thank you for coming!