1. How to Promote Positive Behaviors
Learning Module 2:
How to Promote Positive Behaviors
At Home and at School
Presentation Packet
Provided in
English and Spanish
Created by BCSD Parent Involvement Program
Dr. Tim Fulenwider, Director I, Instructional Support Services
And Liz Gonzalez, Coordinator, PBIS

2. Content Objective: Learn ways to teach behavior at home and at school
Language Objective: To learn terms associated with constructive teaching and positive discipline.
Social Objective: We will exchange ideas in collaborative conversations and complete sentence frames of strategies to try at home.
As you present the objectives, let parents know that you are modeling for them the way in which their students are given lessons. The content objective is what you want them to know at the end of the lesson. Language Objective is the words/terms/vocabulary…necessary to be able to understand the content, and the social objective is “how” they will interact during the delivery of lesson.

3. Positive Behavioral Interventions & Supports (PBIS)
Positive Behavioral Interventions and Supports (PBIS) is a school-wide approach to teaching and supporting positive behaviors and meeting the needs of ALL students.  
Today we are going to be talking about Positive Behavioral Interventions and Supports, better known as PBIS (Pronounced peebus). PBIS is a school-wide approach to teaching and supporting positive behaviors and meting the needs of ALL students. PBIS is aimed at preventing behavior from occurring rather than waiting for problem behavior to happen. The goal is to teach appropriate behavior, recognize, and reinforce it. With time, students will do appropriate behaviors because it’s a benefit to themselves not for a reward (in the beginning, rewards help shape the behavior).

4. Why Teach Behavior? If a child doesn’t know how to read we “teach”
If a child doesn’t know how to swim we “teach”
If a child doesn’t know how to drive we “teach”
If a child doesn’t know how to multiply we “teach”
If a child doesn’t know how to behave we “punish?”
We need to teach behavior! Children must be taught what is expected of them (i.e. respecting their siblings). Behavior must be modeled and reinforced. Children are not born “good” or “bad.” A child behaves based on what they have learned and because it works to meet their needs. We can’t expect children to behave a certain way when we’ve never taught them. Just like every other area, we must teach children how we want them to behavior. This means that children not behaving appropriately can learn new ways of behaving if we teach, model, and reinforce what we expect.

5. PBIS at School…..
Staff commit to build a safe and welcoming environment
School-wide expectations and rules are established
Expectations and rules are taught to students
Appropriate behaviors are acknowledged
Inappropriate behaviors are corrected
Staff must commit to ensuring there is a safe environment where children feel safe.
Staff establish the expectations and rules for every setting (e.g. cafeteria, classroom, bus)
Students are taught the expectations and rules
Staff praise appropriate behavior (e.g. “thank you for being safe by walking down the hallway”) and may even reward it
Inappropriate behaviors are corrected so students are taught how to behave (e.g. “next time, instead of screaming for help you should raise your hand for help!”).

6. In PBIS We Teach Expectations
Universal Expectations
Be Safe
Be Cooperative
Be Respectful
Be Responsible
Be Ready to Learn
In BCSD there are 5 expectations that school’s are responsible for teaching to every student: Be Safe, Be Cooperative, Be Respectful, Be Responsible, and Be Ready to Learn. Schools teach students what each of these expectations look like in every setting of the school. Students learn rules of how to “be”; what to do rather than what not to do.

7. PBIS at Home
Do you have home expectations and rules? (e.g. being responsible)
How do you teach your expectations and rules?
How do you acknowledge your child when they follow the expectations?
How do you correct misbehavior?
NOTE: Read the slide and then have the audience talk to a partner to answer the questions. Then have audience share out a few examples.
Do we tell our children how we want them to behave or are we too focused on punishing? Our children learn behavior from us. We are our child’s first teacher. So why don’t we be intentional and teach what we want rather than just respond when we see something we don’t want. What we teach and how we respond to our children can either increase or decrease the behavior we want.

8. Expectations are Important
We all need expectations that are consistent and predictable
Expectations are positive, specific phrases that help us remember how we should behave:
Be Safe
Help out
Create no more than 3 to 5 expectations
Be creative! Make them fun and memorable for your family
Children need consistency and predictability. When we have predictable expectations, rules, and procedures we feel more comfortable, safe, and can succeed. When we don’t know what is expected of us or what the rules are we feel embarrassed, confused, and uncomfortable. We feel even worse if the rules change.
Expectations are positive, specific phrases that help us remember how we should behave.
What do you expect from your children? Choose no more than 3 to 5 expectations. More than 5 is too many to remember for most kids. Make sure they are specific. Be creative with them. Let’s look at an example.

9. Here you see that a parent used the word “Home” to create their expectations. H stands for help out. O stands for own your behavior. M stands for manners count. And E stands for everyday. Once we have expectations we then need to teach the rules or procedures for what those expectations look like for areas or routines during our day and in our home. For example, in the chart the parent has listed two rules or procedures under mealtime: 1. Set Table, and 2. Clean Up.
This matrix can be used to create expectations for home. Your child can help with developing the chart.

10. Rules Rules are specific actions you want your child to do
Rules should be positive, not negative ex.
Pick up your toys
Fold your clothes and put them away
Non-examples
Don’t hit your sister
Don’t leave your plate on the counter
Rules should always be positively stated; what you want kids to do. Too often we focus on what we don’t want them to do. Kids cannot read your mind. Why do we expect a child to behave if we haven’t directly taught them?

11. Teaching Your Child Expectations and Rules
Every moment is a teaching opportunity
State what you want a child to do
Tell them why you want them to do it
Model and demonstrate
Do it together and praise
Then have them do it alone
Whenever we are with our child we are teaching them. Every moment is a teaching moment. It is important to teach in the context you want the child to behave in. So here is a great what to teach:
State what you want the student to do. Tell them exactly what you want, don’t make them guess. Be direct, no guessing.
Tell them why it is important to do it. Don’t say because I said so. No one learns anything from that. The child might learn to do what you say, but the minute you are gone they aren’t going to do what you want. You want your child to understand so they will do it when you are not around. If something is dangerous then tell you child “we do this because it keeps us safe”.
Show you child what the behavior looks like; model it; demonstrate it to your child. Some children can learn just from words; most don’t. Many of us need not only to hear what to do, but also to see it.
Once you show your child, do it together with them. As they begin to do what you want praise them for doing it.
Then let your child do the behavior themselves.
Even if it takes a little time, it will save you a lot of time later
                    

12. It is a good idea to post your expectations
It is a good idea to post your expectations. Make a fun chart or poster with your child. If you need help designing a chart for your family, come to a parent center and we can help you out!

13. Catch Your Child Being Good
Behavior that is acknowledged and praised is more likely to be repeated!
Try giving specific, positive attention to the behavior that you want to see.
Did you ever stop to think about how much time is spent telling your child what they should not do? Giving specific and positive attention to desired behavior will teach your child what you want them to do and increase the likelihood that this behavior will occur again and again.
Situation Sample:
You are enjoying a remarkably calm family meal, and your 9 year old twins have been kind to each other and have even been using good manners. Instead of waiting for them to start fidgeting or throwing rice at each other, say to them, “Manuel and Marissa, it makes mom and dad so happy to see you two treating each other so nicely! We love the fact that you are saying please and thank you too! Well done!”

14. Self-Control TEAM TIME ACTIVITY:
When your child’s behavior is unacceptable – you can either choose to respond to it or ignore it.
When you remain calm, it also gives you time to think about how to respond.
TEAM TIME ACTIVITY:
Develop a self-control plan
If you decide that a reaction is required, remember that the least response necessary is usually best. Acting calm with a minimum of attention will reduce the risk of strengthening the very behavior you wish to discourage.
Remember you are modeling desired behavior for your child – the more out-of-control your child becomes, the more self-control you need to show.
When you remain calm your child learns appropriate ways to respond to difficult situations.
Situation Sample:
You have just cleaned your entire house and you go to the kitchen for a snack – when you return to the living room your child and his friends have turned over the couch cushions and knocked over a stack of papers every where while playing. Your immediate reaction is to scream at them. “What would be the best way to handle this situation?”
Solution example: Take a deep breath and say, in a calm tone, “I just finished cleaning this room, can you please straighten it back like it was and go outside to play.”
Ask parents to share any experiences they may have had that required them to act calm. Did they act calm immediately, or did they over react and regret their actions?

15. Correcting Misbehavior
A “When…then” statement is a simple instruction that tells your child what they must do for a desired consequence (what they want to do)
When
Then
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This is also known as a contingency statement – when you give these types of statements, be sure you:
Give it a positive focus
State it only once
Set a reasonable time limit
Follow through
Are prepared for your child’s response – it may be “No”
Situation Sample:
It’s a sunny day and your barefoot child has decided that they want to go outside and play in the backyard. As they start outside, you stop them and say, “No…put on your shoes.” They start to throw a tantrum. “What could you say that would provide a “when…then” statement?”
Sample solution: “When you put on your shoes, then you may go outside.” You are not saying “No.” But you are letting them know what needs to happen in order for them to do what they want to do.

16. Changing Behavior With Corrective Teaching?
Corrective Teaching is an effective way to respond to your child’s misbehavior.
This method can be used in many situations where you want to “correct” your child’s behavior.
There are many ways to correct behavior. Here is a method called corrective teaching.
Examples: When your child doesn't’ t follow instructions, or if they choose to argue with your decisions. Corrective teaching helps teach them the appropriate behavior.

17. Steps to Corrective Teaching
Stop and think….what do you want your child to do?
Empathize
Describe what you want them to do
PRAISE
Give a consequence
Empathize: “I can see that you are upset” or “I’m sorry you’re upset right now”
Describe what you want them to do: “I need you to look at me right now”
Praise: “thank you for looking at me”
Consequence: “if you finish your homework then you can play with your friends or else you’ll have to stay in the house all evening”

18. Step 1 Stop and Think Stop and think What is happening?
What you want your child to do?
Why is my child behavior this way?

19. Understand and share feelings.
Step 2 Empathize
Understand and share feelings.
Team Time Activity
How do you respond when your child does something wrong? (i.e. yell, scream, punish)
We need to notice what are children are doing. “Say I notice that ___________, what’s up?”
Ask what your child is thinking right now, or was thinking when they misbehaved.
Empathize with their feelings so they feel validated instead of attacked. Say “I can see how you might feel that way, ok”
Share your feelings. “Right now I feel_____________Do you see why I might feel that way?”

20. Step 3 Describe what you want them to do
Be very clear and specific about what and why
Have your child repeat back to you the positive behavior.
The why is really important.
Role play if necessary, have them show you the expected behavior (i.e. disagreeing appropriately).

21. Step 4 Praise
Praise good behavior. Tell your child how the good behavior has a positive impact.
Example – “Thanks for getting started on your chores right away. The sooner you finish the dishes, the sooner you can play outside with your friends.”
Sometimes kids get stuck and they don’t know how to get unstuck…….the way you say things will help them make a good decision without sounding too punitive.

22. Step 5 Give a Consequence
Make a connection between what he or she does and what will be a result of their action. Such as taking away a privilege or adding chores.
Positive behavior = rewards
Negative behavior = consequences

23. There is so much more! There are many ways to work with children
Not every child is the same
Let us know what your struggles are
We can help! Let us connect you with people or training to help.
Together we make a team and community for our children!
Elicit areas in which parents might want additional training.

24. Questions?