1. Practical Guidance for Today’s Counselors

2. What kinds of situations are you finding where You don’t know what to do?

4. 1. How can I know everything? 2. Main reason: Not knowing is a door and not a wall 3. Just admit it Why is it ok to not know?

5. 10. Is frantically searching for the “Ask the Shrink” ap on his smart phone. 9. Pretends to fall asleep while talking to you. 8. If you are having trouble with low self- esteem, he tells you he doesn’t have time for you today. 7. Turns all your inner children against you. 6. Tells the secretary to pull the fire alarm 15 minutes into the session. Top 10 List: How to Know Your Therapist Doesn’t Know What to Do

6. 5. Follows your concerns with, “You think you got it bad, my sister in....” 4. Constantly rolling his eyes and making cuckoo signs. 3. At the end of your session, he yells, “Time’s up,” and high fives the receptionist. 2. Whenever you tell him one of your dreams, he says, “Come on, that’s an old Twilight Zone.” 1. Constantly asks you “so you’re just going to rule out suicide completely?” Top 10 List: How to Know Your Therapist Doesn’t Know What to Do

7. YOU ARE ONLY AS GOOD A THERAPIST AS YOU ARE A PERSON If you want to be a better therapist, you need to work on being a better person. The Use of “Self” in Therapy

8. Principles

9. Relationship -Survey shows Curiosity- CSI Client’s theory of change - Erickson and the horse Love and fear Factors that create change in the therapeutic process

10. Humor Perspective Keeping Fresh Avoid Pet Theories Factors that create change in the therapeutic process

11. Specific Situations and Skills

12. Client Relationship with Therapist Problem Sources of Not Knowing

13. 1. Is unmotivated. Answer: anticipation of reward, fear of consequences 2. Is stuck or has given up. Answer: chunk up, chunk down 3. Is overwhelmed Answer: review progress, therapeutic vacation 4. Has a personality disorder Answer: Utilization, walking the dog I don’t know what to do when the client:

15. 1. The client is challenging or antagonistic towards you. Answer: Aikido 2. The client is emotionally draining Answer: Semi-permeable membrane, massage advice 3. The client lies Answer: Gandhi Story, turn off BS detector 4. The client is resistant Answer: And why is that? I don’t know what to do when in the relationship:

16. Has so many aspects Answer: Serenity list Is a hopeless situation Answer: Answer vs. Answers. Others are the source of the problem Answer: Strength bombardment, empowerment I don’t know what to do when the problem :

17. Silence Favorite questions Refer Some other strategies

19. Join the Website What to Do When You Don’t Know What to D o at jonwindercounseling.com

20. Thank you for what you are doing!