1. Warm-up  Assume that you are the parent.  What dating rules would you have for your teenager?  What would you do to keep them safe?  Do these rules differ from mother and father?

2. Warm-up  “Make what you are, what you want, so you can have both what you are and what you want!“  “You Don’t Marry What You Want You Marry What You are.”  How is this quote true in relation to dating?

3. Warm-up  How long should you be dating before you are an “official” couple or steady dating?  What would your parents say?  What would you tell your children?

4. Today…let’s play catch up!  Warm-up: How long should you be dating before you are an “official” couple or steady dating? What would your parents say?  Complete Dating Puzzle as review!  Chapter 8 Test, use your notes!

5. Warm-up  Read “Appointment with Love”.  Is this love or infatuation. Explain why.  How does Lt. Blanford react?

6. Warm-up  Make a list of 10 creative dates that are low-cost, but fun.

7. Chapter 8: Dating KILGORE

8. Love vs. Infatuation Love  Grows slowly  Long lasting  Love entire person  Want the person to grow  Willing to compromise  Improves performance  More kind and thoughtful  Trust  Ability to wait  More realistic Infatuation  Rush to marry  Less ambition, idealistic  Happens quickly  Short lived  Physical attraction  Jealousy  Many arguments  Twitterpated  Loss of appetite  Insecure in relationship

9. Dating…Understanding it’s purpose & process  Attitude – yourself  Growth  Positive and Negative Experiences  Long-term commitment  Timing (too young/too early)  Fickle  Slows much needed growth during your teen years  Decision making and goal achievement  Hindered? Consquences?

10. Styles of Dating  What is a date?  Dating is a social activity in which a couple spends time together getting to know each other.  Formal vs. Informal  What are they?  Examples?  Preference?  Then and now…  Traditionally  2015  Dating in the 1950s! Dating in the 1950s!

11. Functions of Dating  Understanding others  Understanding yourself  Providing companionship  Improving communication  Learning to negotiate  Learning responsibility  Evaluating personality traits

12. Stages of Dating  Relationships go through stages  Group dating= spending time dating with a large group of people.  Pair dating= as a couple develops a relationship with each other they spend more time one on one.  Steady dating= a commitment to dating only one person.

13. Advantages & Disadvantages Good  Security  Trust  Respect  Future  Be yourself  Feel loved Bad  May feel trapped  Breakup may be difficult  Peer pressure  Can limit experiences  Less time spent with friends

14. Survey Says…  Review the survey data

15. Starting a Relationship  Dating advice (from our book):  Make your appearance count.  Be friendly, confident, and courteous.  Start a conversation.  Listen intently to what the person shares.  Plan time together.

16. Personal Boundaries  Personal boundaries= are limits for behavior within relationships.  Apply to what you are willing to allow others to say or do to you.  Can help you know when a relationship has crossed the line.  Unhealthy behaviors signal that it is time to end a relationship.

17. Signs of an Unhealthy Relationship  Any kind of physical abuse.  Verbal abuse (name calling, yelling, demeaning criticism)  Demands on your times so you can not maintain relationships with friends and family.  Demand for sexual favors.  Disrespect for your ideas, feelings, and self.

18. Ending a Relationship  Close relationships rarely end by mutual consent.  Ending a relationship can be painful.  Focus on growth.  Suggestions for breakups:  Realize your partner will feel hurt.  Change your dating patterns.  Recognize your feelings are normal.  Emphasize other aspects of your life.

19. True?

20. Commitment to Marry  Engagement= formal commitment is the final stage before marriage.  In many relationships, a type of magnetism exists that draws two people together.  Dating which leads to marriage should be approached slowly.  It takes time for a couple to develop and identify whether the initial attraction will last.

21. Love  Romantic love= exhilarating feeling that can spark a relationship.  Mature love= long lasting, caring, and giving type of love.  Infatuation= strong feeling of attraction, tends to be one sided.

24. Qualities in a Mate  Trustworthy  Outgoing  Sense of humor  Athletic  Healthy lifestyle  Romantic  Has to want children  Ambitious  Well educated  Dress nice/fashion  Lots in common!  Like pets  Same beliefs/church  Shares feelings/open  Helps around the house  Has a job!  Musical/sings/plays guitar  Taller than me  Not competitive  Wants to travel  Patient  Independent  Nice family

25. Assignment: Your ideal mate.

26. Growth of Mature Love  Develop rapport: enjoy being together, want to spend more time getting to know each other.  Personal sharing: as a couple shares time, thoughts, ideas, and feelings, the find acceptance in each other.  Dependency on each other: couple becomes attached, depend on each other for support and encouragement, the miss each other when they are apart.  Feeling of satisfaction: both feel their personal needs are being met, love grows deeper.

27. Expressing Affection  As a couple grows closer, they may find themselves drawn into a desire to give physical expression to their love.  Think about your choices, consider the consequences, and make logical decisions based on your values.

28. Psychological Consequences  Many people are brought up to believe that sexual intimacy belongs in marriage.  Values learned from family, friends, and religious beliefs may be very strong.  Having sex does not signify commitment.  Negative consequences of self doubt, guilt, feeling used, fear, and lack of trust can occur.

29. Pregnancy  Abstinence= not having sex, only 100% method of avoiding pregnancy.  Caring for a baby is a 24 hour responsibility that requires social, emotional, and intellectual maturity.  Teen parents may not finish high school.  Teen pregnancy poses health risks for mother and baby.  May not receive proper prenatal care because they are in denial.

30. STD’s  HPV= infect the skin and mucous membranes, may cause…  Genital warts= small bumps or clusters of bumps on the genitals.  Some HPV types can cause cervical cancer.  Gonorrhea= a bacterial infection that can damage the male and female organs, resulting in sterility.  Chlamydia= a bacterial infection that can damage a woman's reproductive organs, may not no obvious symptoms.  Herpes= incurable virus produces painful sores or blisters.  Syphilis= bacterial infection can be treated with an antibiotic, begins with chancre sore, can affect liver, skin, heart and nervous system.  Hepatitis B= a virus that attacks the liver.  AIDS= caused by HIV, attacks cells that help fight infection and disease.

31. Rape  Rape= forced sexual intercourse.  Date rape= forced sex with a dating partner against one’s will.  Studies show that alcohol and drugs are often involved.  Date rape drugs cause victims to become physically helpless and unable to remember.  Don’t take a drink from a stranger!  No means no!