1. Breakdown of good essay!!
Essentials Of Writing
Breakdown of good essay!!

2. Steps in the Writing Process
1. Pre-writing (get ideas together, notes)
2. Shaping the essay
3. First draft (rough draft)
4. Revision (peer editing) ideas flow?
5. Edit (punctuation
6. Final Draft
** technically 5 steps

3. Body Paragraph(s) Paragraphs #2 and #3 Eight sentences 100+ words
Should relate back to thesis
The “middle part” of an essay = the meat of the hamburger
Develops the points you want to make

4. Body Paragraph Structure
Sentence 1: Topic sentence
Sentence 2: Concrete detail, starts with For example,
Sentence 3: Commentary
Sentence 4: Commentary
Sentence 5: Concrete detail, starts with In addition
Sentence 6: Commentary
Sentence 7: Commentary
Sentence 8: Conclusion, all commentary

5. Concrete Details
Very specific details that are the backbone of your paragraphs (reasons to support your case)
Concrete details include: facts, specific examples, descriptions, quotes, proof, evidence (articles, newspapers, other sources)
The reasons why!!

6. Commentary Your opinion about the topic being discussed
Synonyms: opinion, interpretation, your own experience with the subject, reflection, how does it impact you, etc.
Ask yourself…..How do I feel about this??
Further explaining your reasons!!
Comment on the point you made!

7. Topic Sentence The very first sentence in your body paragraphs
Must have the subject (whatever you’re talking about) and commentary (your feeling)
Tells what your entire paragraph will be explaining
Ex. I like camping more than anything

8. Putting It All Together
Sentence #1 (TS): I hate shopping for Christmas. (it contains subject and feeling)
Sentence #2 (CD): For example, the lines always have five or six people waiting for one cashier.
Sentence # 3 (CM): It takes forever to pay for something  how does it affect you?
Sentence # 4 (CM): By the time I’m finished, I’m exhausted from running around. how does it affect you?

9. Your Turn!
Remember: 2 points of commentary for every concrete detail!!!
Sentence #1 (TS): The walls in this classroom are dull and boring
Sentence # 2 (CD): For example,________
Sentence # 3 (CM):__________ (how it makes you feel)
Sentence # 4 (CM): __________ how it makes you feel)

10. Concluding Sentence Last sentence in the body paragraph ALL commentary
Don’t repeat key words
Sum it all up, give it a finished feeling

11. Tying it All Together Thesis: My favorite season of the year is summer
Paragraph 1
TS: The biggest reason is the relaxed change in my daily routine.
CD: For example, I have time to sleep in and stay up late.
CM: There are not emotional or physical demands on me.
CM: I can recharge my energies for awhile.
CD: In addition, I can watch TV or read as long as I want.
CM: I have the leisure to do things I normally wouldn’t.
CM: It feels okay to do them when I have unlimited time..
CS: Not having any commitments lets me unwind

12. Writing Detectives!! What is wrong with the following commentary??
(TS) Camping is wonderful. For example, I like the fresh air the most. I hated the bites I got there. In addition, my family argued the whole time.
How can me make this better. Let’s hear your examples!!

13. Great Job! This sounds much better….
Camping is wonderful. For example, I like the fresh air the most. I always feel healthier after some time in the mountains. It feels good to breathe deeply after the smog of the city.
Yellow= concrete detail
Orange= commentary

14. With A Partner…. Enhance the following commentary…
Camping is the best vacation. For example, the air is clean and and clear. It sure is good being there. I like it a lot.

15. Introduction Paragraph
The very first paragraph in an essay
It includes the thesis (very end, last sentence of your intro paragraph)
Writer must find a way to “hook” the reader.

16. Thesis Statement The very last sentence in your intro paragraph
The overarching idea of your paper what is the point in this paper
Most important sentence
All body paragraphs should relate back to thesis
Sentence with subject and opinion (commentary)

17. Types of Intros (Hook the reader)
1. Quotes- Must include quotation marks and cite the source (famous person)
2. Anecdote- BRIEF personal story relating to the topic
3. Fact/Statistic-
4. Definition (WEAK)- Not too long, not a common everyday word
5. Question (Can also be very weak) answered in reader’s mind
6. Startling information- use exclamation point and word that makes readers jump

18. DO NOT…..
Start intro with “ I am going to tell you about” or “This paper is going to be about”
Not too much detail
Not too short
Not too wordy
Perfect = 40+ words
See Intro PPT

19. Thesis Statement Last sentence in opening paragraph
Contains subject and opinion
EX: Australia is the best country of all for a vacation
Format: Intro Paragraph
Intro Hook (think of your options) = 4 sentences
Thesis after your hook= 1 sentence

20. Lets Practice
For each thesis, underline the subject and circle the opinion (commentary)
Fishing is fun to do when I’m with my dad
English is my favorite class
It’s exciting going to a new school
Tacos are my favorite food

21. Thesis…yes or no? 1. My high school is the best one around__
2. I have gone to East High for 3 years__
3. My family went to Disneyland last year__
4. School is a cool place to be__
5. We are required to take 4 courses this school year__
Answer: Y, N,N,Y,N…How did you do?

22. Conclusion/ Concluding Paragraph
Last paragraph in essay
Sums up ideas and reflects on what was said
Say more commentary about your subject (save the best for last)
ALL COMMENTARY!!
Do not repeat thesis or key words (same words from paragraphs)
Tie it all together
RESTATE thesis in different words
4-5 sentences!! See pgs in yellow handout for help!!