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1 Hierarchy of Concerns Created by Barbara Ohrstrom, Adapted by Rebecca Wolf
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What is the Hierarchy of Concerns? When reviewing a draft, consider how to move it forward through a series of guided revisions. This hierarchy allows us to direct our focus from global to more specific concerns over time: Focus Development Structure (Rhetorical) Paragraph Organization Sentence Mechanics 1. Focus 2. Development 3. Rhetorical Structure 4. Paragraph Organization 5. Sentence Mechanics 2
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1.Focus College writing needs to be focused. This means considering three things: Topic: narrowed down and adequate for the paper length Thesis statement: A single sentence at the end of your first paragraph that presents the position you will be conveying to the reader throughout your essay Audience: To whom are you writing? What are you trying to persuade your audience to think, feel, or do? 3
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2. Development Supports Focus Each punctuation mark, word, sentence, paragraph, and page all form a symphony of ideas — just as an incorrectly plucked violin string shatters the harmony of a symphony, an unrelated idea shatters the harmony of ideas making up your focus. Writers provide support for the thesis by: using inductive or deductive reasoning, giving examples, providing details, defining, analyzing a subject or process, dividing and classifying, comparing and contrasting, and/or showing causes and effects. 4
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Using Evidence When deciding what pieces of evidence to use as examples to support your claims, always consider the most relevant possible evidence. You may also want to consider using a variety of evidence to appeal to your audience: logos, pathos, ethos. Each example needs several sentences of description and analysis that shows how each part of the example supports the essay’s thesis. 5
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3. Rhetorical Structure Format: Any writer can organize essays and/or paragraphs into various rhetorical forms; e.g., cause and effect, process, narrative, descriptive, persuasive, informational, etc. Methods of Presentation: Writers can also organize their work chronologically, least to most important, most to least important, general to specific, spatially, etc. Field-specific: Professional fields, such as science and medicine, use their own rhetorical structures. 6
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4. Paragraph Organization Your initial claim (thesis) needs to be developed throughout the paper and in each paragraph. Each paragraph contains one, and only one, idea stated in a topic sentence. That idea needs to be supported with reasons, evidence, numbers, names, statistics, details and/or examples. The sentences within each paragraph need to be organized to support the topic sentence. You also need to connect each paragraph to the following paragraph with transitions. Transitions form a bridge between ideas. Transitions can be one word, a sentence at the end of a paragraph, a sentence at the beginning of a paragraph, or a group of sentences. 7
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5. Sentence Mechanics Once you have revised your paper for focus, development, structure, and paragraph organization, THEN you can focus on document format (APA), editing and proofreading. Read the essay aloud and correct grammatical errors. Writers also line edit sentences to make them convey their meaning with style—no errors have been made. Revision focuses on removing passive verbs, adjusting tone, and making stylistic changes to strengthen the writer’s voice. If you are not sure whether someone has corrected an error or made a stylistic suggestions, please ask for clarification. 8
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Essay Conclusion A writer explores the implications of their well-argued thesis statement by discussing one or more of the following: What does your conclusion mean for the future? What does it mean in a similar, related context? What consequences exist if your conclusion is implemented? With what last thought or image do you want to leave your reader? 9
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Lecture Summary 10
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