1. Furrows Law Christmas Lecture University of Bath Department of Mechanical Engineering Presented By: M Ball Mfill. Mshag. S.Pickering Mfck. PhDD Ground breaking research into the visual acuity experienced by subjects while using beer goggles

2. Critical Ugliness, U* U*=C B x (N PULL /U MING ) Where: N PULL =No. of pulls in last 12 months C B = Bath Bird Constant (aka BBC) C B = 1.0 for Town Pulls (BBC1) C B = 2.0 for Campus Pulls (BBC2) C B = 5.0 for Bondi Beach Pulls (BONZA) Example 1.1 3 pulls in freshers week (for the year) Out in Town. U* = 1.0 x (3/4)= 0.75 (V.Low score) U MING =Avg Actual Prettiness of Pulls

3. Case Study: Subject J Please Note: None of the subjects used in the making of this case study were permanently damaged by what they had experienced. (They were already like that)

4. View of Subject J with the catch of the day (as seen through beer goggles). [Furrows Chart - Perceived prettiness = 9, Alcohol = 9 ]

5. View of Subject J with the catch of the day (without beer goggles). [See Furrows Law chart - Alcohol = 0 ]

6. Further Research Underlying theory: Stretching the envelope To include the female perspective

7. Φ-Male Theory The following variables have so far been identified for the algorithm: Max factor - Makeup quality and cost P MT-up -Auxiliary makeup supplies N bag - No. of cosmetic items in hand bag. Æ - aspect ratio (mirror) ε - linear strain (straps) τ - Sheer stress - kinematic viscosity (relative excitement) Q - flow rate (related to ) T - Torq - also know as the Moment of Force V AG - Volume and Gap (gift of the)

8. μ - friction coefficient (inter-group) Month - Lunar phase - Morgan-Oasis constant - Same clothes factor - Inter-group Phase difference ƒ flirt - Flirt Frequency (= 1/horny period ) F ME - Meat-market factor N previous - Past lovers (make past lovers jealous) N Future - Future lovers (To be impressed) Rand - Random -Male Factor

9. - Inter-group Phase difference ƒ flirt - Flirt Frequency (= 1/horny period ) F ME - Meat-market factor N previous - Past lovers (make past lovers jealous) N Future - Future lovers (To be impressed) Rand - Random -Male Factor

10. R a - Surface finish (makeup) (12.5μm - rough turned with visible tooling marks 1.6μm - static mating surfaces) (pg30) M BEND - Bending moment (pg47) C B - Bush thickness σ LIM - Fatigue limit (pg58) FOS - Factor of Safety - eg Heavy duty shafting, 10-12 (pg 59) x - Dryness Fraction (pg 66) P LOSS - Dynamic Head Loss (could be painful) (pg70) Z - Potential Head (pg70) Pv - Velocity Head (pg70) P T - Total Head (pg70) D flange - Flange type -(Raised face, O-ring, Recessed face, Tongue and Groove) (pg87) E LIM - Elastic limit (pg166) P INNIT - Initiation point (pg167) The following other variables have been taken from the IMechE Engineers Data Book - all credit due for compiling some useful termonolgy.