1. Tame Your Reptile Brain 6-2-15

2. Sources Bradberry, Travis and Jean Greaves. Emotional Intelligence 2.0. TalentSmart, 2009. Connors, Roger, et. al. The Oz Principle: Getting Results Through Individual and Organizational Accountability. Penguin Group, 2004. Patterson, Kerry, et. al. Crucial Conversations: Tools for Talking When Stakes are High. McGraw Hill, 2012. Rutledge, Pamela. “SxSW Panel: Does the Internet Make You Happy?” Transmedia Storytelling Workshops: For Organizations, Branding, and Marketing. http://athinklab.com/2011/03/18/sxsw- panel-does-the-internet-make-you-happy/. Accessed 3/17/2014.http://athinklab.com/2011/03/18/sxsw- panel-does-the-internet-make-you-happy/ “Study Shows compassion meditation changes the brain”, March 25, 2008. http://www.news.wisc.edu/14944, accessed, 3/19/2014.http://www.news.wisc.edu/14944

3. Agenda Examine how emotions play into interactions with others Learn a process to change your own perceptions Learn how to interact with “difficult” people

4. Introductions  Name  Position  What is one negative emotion you’ve felt recently during an interaction with another person?

5. Emotional Hijacking

7. Emotional Situations See & Hear Feel Act

8. What’s Your Story? See & Hear Tell a Story Feel Act

9. What’s the Story? What kinds of negative assumptions could be made about someone who is: o Grumpy? o Demanding? o Confused? o Full of excuses? VIDEO 1

10. What’s Your Story? Ask yourself: o What emotions are encouraging me to act this way? o What story is creating these emotions? o What evidence do I have to support this story (facts)? Be sure to: o State clear observable facts (e.g., spoke in a loud voice) o Don’t judge the facts (e.g., loud voice means angry)

11. Three Common Stories Victim o I feel I am an innocent sufferer. Someone else has caused the problem. Villain o I imply the other person has bad motives and feel its necessary to warn everyone else about them. Helpless o I think I am powerless to change the circumstances and feel nothing can be done.

12. CAUTION! Don’t fall into group think o Our story can be strengthened through others who have the same story. The story can grow and get worse. Don’t rally the troops o We can strengthen our story by finding others to validate it (even when it wasn’t their story ). Allies will embrace your story and it can become us vs. them.

13. Changing Your Story If we take control of our stories, they won’t control us Why do I need to change my story? o Is your story helping the situation? o Is your story making things worse? Stories are based on assumptions o Changes in each situation o We can change the story/assumption on purpose

14. Master your Story Add compassion o Project, UW-Madison Consciously pick your story VIDEO 2

15. Master Your Stories Why would a reasonable, rational, and decent person do what this person is doing? What do I really want? For me? For others? For the relationship? What would I do right now if I really wanted these results?

16. What’s Your Story? See & Hear CHANGE Your Story Feel Act

17. Stop Emotional Hijacking Story