1. Building Strong Families

2. What is the definition of FAMILY?  2 or more adults related by blood, marriage, or affiliation who cooperate economically, share a common dwelling place and rear children

3. Family Structure  Nuclear: Mother, Father, Child  Single Parent: Mother or Father and child  Blended: Single parent marries another person who may or may not have children  Extended: Parent or parents, one child at least and relatives

4.  Forming traditions  Handling family conflict  Feel accepted  Adults and children learn and grow  Sense of belonging  Emotional support  Security  Spend time together  Share responsibilities  Work to resolve differences  They listen to each other  Share goals and values and show appreciation Building Strong Families

5. Family Placement Activity Students who are: Students who are: The oldest child go to the #1 corner.The oldest child go to the #1 corner. The youngest child go to the #2 corner.The youngest child go to the #2 corner. The middle child go to the #3 corner.The middle child go to the #3 corner. The only child go to the #4 corner.The only child go to the #4 corner. What is great about your placement? What is not so great?

6. Birth Order The order in which children are born into a family influences the development of the children. The order in which children are born into a family influences the development of the children. Oldest children bear the burden of the parents’ heaviest expectations and also of the parents’ inexperience in raising children. Oldest children bear the burden of the parents’ heaviest expectations and also of the parents’ inexperience in raising children. Second or third children are generally treated in a more relaxed way by the parents. Second or third children are generally treated in a more relaxed way by the parents. Youngest children often have a more difficult time in making the transition to adulthood. Youngest children often have a more difficult time in making the transition to adulthood.

7. Oldest Child  Usually set up as an example to the other children.  Treated more like an adult by his/her parents.  A high achiever.  Given and accepts more responsibility than the other children.  Usually college-bound.  Independent.  Affectionate.

8. Middle Child May work extra-hard to get recognition. May work extra-hard to get recognition. Is usually a peacemaker. Is usually a peacemaker. Is somewhat average in schoolwork, but is an all- around good student. Is somewhat average in schoolwork, but is an all- around good student. Is usually a calm, even- tempered adult. Is usually a calm, even- tempered adult.

9. Youngest Child Gets a lot of attention, along with a lot of bossing. Gets a lot of attention, along with a lot of bossing. May be spoiled. May be spoiled. Usually matures quickly. Usually matures quickly. May be undisciplined and irresponsible. May be undisciplined and irresponsible. Is easy-going about school. Is easy-going about school. Likes to associate with someone who takes charge of situations. Likes to associate with someone who takes charge of situations.

10. Parenting Styles AUTHORITARIAN (limits without Freedom) Parents’ word is law, parents have absolute control. Children are told what to do, how to do it,and where to do it, and when to do it. PERMISSIVE (Freedom without limits) Parents allow their children to do their own thing. Non-controlling, non-demanding Children walk all over their parents DEMOCRATIC (Freedom within limits) freedom along with rights of others and responsibilities of all Parents set limits and enforce rules. They are willing to listen receptively to child’s requests and questions. Parents are loving, consistent, and demanding.

11. Guiding Behavior…..  Be sure you have their attention  Be polite  Use positive statements  Use words they can understand  Begin with action verb  Give limited directions at a time  Be clear  Give praise and love  Be a good role model  Set limits  Positive reinforcement

12. Punishment  Must be appropriate and effective  Role of warnings  Negative reinforcement  Natural consequences  Logical consequences  Loss of privileges  Time out

13. What doesn’t work?  Bribing  Promising to behave  Shouting / Yelling  Shaming / Belittling  Threatening to withhold love  Exaggerating the consequences

14. Consistency  Consistent guidance is key  Develops confidence, trust and expectations