1. Using sharp physical details to create great writing (aka, showing vs. telling)

2.  Ma put the kids to bed and did some sewing until they fell asleep.

3.  Ma kissed them both, and tucked the covers in around them. They lay there awhile, looking at Ma’s smooth, parted hair and her hands busy with sewing in the lamplight. Her needle made little clicking sounds against her thimble and then the thread went softly, swish! through the pretty calico that Pa had traded furs for.

4.  The baker listened to the lady make a cake order for her kid’s 8 th birthday.

5.  The baker, who was an older man with a thick neck, listened without saying anything when she told him the child would be eight years next Monday. The Baker wore a white apron that looked like a smock. Straps cut under his arms, went around his back and then to the front again where they were secured under his heavy waist. He wiped his hands on his apron as he listened to her. He kept his eyes down on the photographs and let her talk. He let her take her time. He’d just come to work and he’d be there all night, baking, and he was in no real hurry.

6.  Maniac looked all around the house and couldn’t believe how gross and broken-down it was.

7.  Maniac had seen some amazing things in his lifetime, but nothing as amazing as that house. From the smell of it, he knew this wasn’t the first time an animal had relieved itself on the rugless floor. In fact, in another corner he spotted a form of relief that could not be soaked up by newspapers.  Cans and bottles lay all over, along with crusts, peelings, cores, scraps, rinds, wrappers— everything you would normally find in a garbage can. And everywhere there were raisins.

8.  As he walked through the dining room, something—an old tennis ball—hit him on top of the head and bounced away. He looked up—into the laughing faces of Russell and Piper. The hole in the ceiling was so big they both could have jumped through it at once.  He ran a hand along one wall. The peeling paint came off like cornflakes.

9.  Nothing could be worse than the living and dining rooms, yet the kitchen was. A jar of peanut butter had crashed to the floor; someone had gotten a running start, jumped into it, and skied a brown, one-footed track to the stove. On the table were what appeared to be the remains of an autopsy performed upon a large bird, possibly a crow. The refrigerator contained two food groups: mustard and beer. The raisins here were even more abundant. He spotted several of them moving. They weren’t raisins; they were roaches.