1. THE FIVE ASKERS © LAURA FREDRICKS, FOUNDER & CEO, THE ASK © AFP SOUTHEASTERN WISCONSIN/MADISON CHAPTERS AUGUST 13, 2015 laura@EXPERTonTHEASK.com expertontheask

2. Why is ASKing so Important? Because it governs every aspect of our lives Everything we Want, Need and Deserve! Personally AND Professionally ASKing is Empowerment! Sunday, October 25, 2015 Twitter: expertontheask #justask

3. Most “ASKs” are in our Heads! A person makes on average 150 ASKs a day:  Should I get up now or in 5 minutes?  What should I wear to work?  Should I skip or grab breakfast?  Should I take the local roads/local train instead of the highway/express?  This is all within first ½ hour of your day! Sunday, October 25, 2015 Twitter: expertontheask #justask

4. What type of ASKer are you? Sunday, October 25, 2015 Twitter: expertontheask #justask

5. 3 Key Components  Which of the 5 ASKers are you and what characteristics of the 5 ASKers do you have?  Which kind of ASKer is your ASKing partner and do you compliment each other or cancel each other out?  Which kind of ASKer can your donor HEAR and feel most compatible??!!! Sunday, October 25, 2015 Twitter: expertontheask #justask

6. ASKer #1  You are pleasant, deep thinker, and you are very strategic  You soften the conversation with your low tone of voice  You are very confident and you take your time to make sure everyone is comfortable  You will avoid confrontation and smooth things over quickly Sunday, October 25, 2015 Twitter: expertontheask #justask

7. #1 – The Delicate Dodger Sunday, October 25, 2015 Twitter: expertontheask #justask

8. You Might Look Like This! Sunday, October 25, 2015 Twitter: expertontheask #justask

9. #1 – The Delicate Dodger  WORDS: “Kindly,” “May I,” “Of course,” “Only if it is ok with you,” “Sure,” “Perhaps,” “Let us think about this.”  BODY LANGUAGE: Wear neutral colors; have a pensive look; tend to sit opposite the person being ASKed; Nod your head.  POSITIVES: In the moment; great listener; strongly believe this is the best way to build consensus; take your time to get to YES. Sunday, October 25, 2015 Twitter: expertontheask #justask

10. Refinements and Pairing  May need to inject some energy to convey the importance and impact of your ASK  Be mindful of the time because your lay back style and methodical presence may take away time needed to explore all aspects of your ASK  IF you are ASKing a high profile, busy, business person may want to take someone who is opposite you keep the pace going Sunday, October 25, 2015 Twitter: expertontheask #justask

11. ASKer #2  ASKing is a challenge but you really want and need to do it.  You think of your own situation and reflect that giving “away” money is really hard.  Your approach is one of empathy which is how you feel when you ASK or you are ASKed.  People may not be able to give now so you hang with them and firmly believe they will give eventually. Sunday, October 25, 2015 Twitter: expertontheask #justask

12. #2 – The Remorseful Requester Sunday, October 25, 2015 Twitter: expertontheask #justask

13. #2 – The Remorseful Requester  WORDS: “Bother you,” “Totally understand,” “Sorry” “I know exactly what you are saying/thinking/feeling” “Very difficult”  BODY LANGUAGE: Shoulders are forward; head tilt; eyes are centered but distant; presence eludes hesitation; sit diagonally  POSITIVES: Share this bonding moment; sensitivity is to be admired; care so much about the people you ASK Sunday, October 25, 2015 Twitter: expertontheask #justask

14. Refinements and Pairing  Remember you are ASKing for your organization not yourself  You are not taking something away…you are giving them the opportunity to feel good  Your ASK will take a long time to close no matter who you ASK so practice with colleagues, board member, volunteer and little by little you will gain more confidence Sunday, October 25, 2015 Twitter: expertontheask #justask

15. ASKer #3  You are smiling and happy, and the person being ASKed knows you and loves you.  You are considered as close as family with the person you are ASKing.  The person being ASKed has all the information about your ASK.  You can spend minimal time actually ASKing because of your strong relationships. Sunday, October 25, 2015 Twitter: expertontheask #justask

16. #3 – The Assuming Asker Sunday, October 25, 2015 Twitter: expertontheask #justask

17. #3 – The Assuming Asker  WORDS: “Ok,” “This is great,” “Absolutely,” “Wonderful.”  BODY LANGUAGE: Happy as can be; wide smile; sparkling eyes; fluid hand movements; very relaxed; sitting as close as you can.  POSITIVES: Love what you do; love who you do it with; there is no need to ASK it is just going to happen or the ASK gets buried in conversation Sunday, October 25, 2015 Twitter: expertontheask #justask

18. Refinements and Pairing  Believe that people really do need direction and specifics for any ASK including do the ASK and give an amount  Separate just a bit from the closeness of the friendship/business relationship – “may be awkward” “I’m putting on my nonprofit hat now”  Tend to be very comfortable with people you know, not people you don’t know practice with people you know and then branch out to others Sunday, October 25, 2015 Twitter: expertontheask #justask

19. ASKer #4 The conversation is a bit one-sided. You have a lot of information to share and it is important that you share all the details. The person being ASKed seems engaged by listening to what you have to say. You feel very comfortable if you do a majority of the talking so that the person being ASKed will have more than enough information. Sunday, October 25, 2015 Twitter: expertontheask #justask

20. #4 The Domineering Demander Sunday, October 25, 2015 Twitter: expertontheask #justask

21. #4 The Domineering Demander They Don’t Always Look Like This: Sunday, October 25, 2015 Twitter: expertontheask #justask

22. #4 The Domineering Demander  WORDS: “We are on it,” “We always,” “Everything is on target,” “We just know,” “Don’t you agree?” “The time is now”  BODY LANGUAGE: Wide shoulders; eyes are focused; tone of voice is strong and powerful; sharp, neat dresser; sit directly opposite leaning in  POSITIVES: Convincing personality; You are determined and focused; Many people are attracted to your intensity and eagerness Sunday, October 25, 2015 Twitter: expertontheask #justask

23. Refinements and Pairing  I’m not sure this type can be refined…think of your bosses and CEO’s!!!  Take the time to practice listening skills just by increasing the amount of questions you ASK instead of downloading information  Definitely want to be paired with a non- domineering ASKer for balance Sunday, October 25, 2015 Twitter: expertontheask #justask

24. ASKer #5  You have a good balance between speaking and listening.  You are extremely versed in all aspects of your ASK including what the person being ASKed may say.  You have a script that is well-rehearsed and you are comfortable doing the ASK with others.  You radiate trustworthiness. Sunday, October 25, 2015 Twitter: expertontheask #justask

25. #5 – The Polished Proposer Sunday, October 25, 2015 Twitter: expertontheask #justask

26. #5 – The Polished Proposer  WORDS: “Just fine,” “Terrific,” “Of course,” “Couldn’t be happier,” “Great news” “We will find out for you.”  BODY LANGUAGE: Lean into the conversation; shoulders are forward; sit across the table; pay particular attention to dress details, shoes, nails, hair, briefcase; eyes are compassionate  POSITIVES: You have done your homework and preparation is working for you! Sunday, October 25, 2015 Twitter: expertontheask #justask

27. Refinements and Pairing  Be sure that as confident as you are you are also flexible and can stray from the script if the person you are ASKing needs more information  Make sure you do not come off as too stiff, too scripted, because you want some warmth and to be genuine in your ASK  Think ahead if person being ASKed needs a less formal approach and if a mere gesture of taking off your jacket, using less jewelry is would be better Sunday, October 25, 2015 Twitter: expertontheask #justask

28. The 5 ASKers Sunday, October 25, 2015 Twitter: expertontheask #justask

29. Exercise  What type of ASKer would be best for : 1) High profile donor? 2) 30 year old up and coming business entrepreneur? 3) Elderly couple considering a bequest? 4) Female self-made business owner? 5) Sports fanatac? 6) Retired active couple? Sunday, October 25, 2015 Twitter: expertontheask #justask

30. WHAT KIND OF ASKER ARE YOU? Tweet: @expertontheask Share your thoughts and become a Follower You could WIN “THE A$K!” our answer Sunday, October 25, 2015 Twitter: expertontheask #justask

31. The quality of your life is determined by the quality of questions you ASK yourself… and others! Twitter: expertontheask #justask Sunday, October 25, 2015

32. STAY IN TOUCH! Twitter: expertontheask #justask Sunday, October 25, 2015