4. The Men The Women  To establish status  To exchange information  Relationships are vertical  To network  To create connections  Relationships are horizontal

5.  Dialects males & females use to communicate  Learned early on during developmental years  Include › Word choice › Intonations › Body language

6.  The underlying meaning or implicit message given or received in communication  Can be different between deliverer and recipient of the message

7.  Do you need help? › You’re incompetent › I want to teach you  “Long distance relationship- that must be hard.” › Questioning your stability › Wanting to show support  Chivalry › Politeness › Controlling

8.  The alignment within a relationship, heavily involved with metamessages › Protective › One- up vs. One- down  Asymmetrical- Men  Contest  Symmetrical – Women  Community

9.  Different communication styles  Different reasons to communicate  Different messages delivered and received  What now?

11.  What men hear from women… › Gossip › Nagging › Complaining › Too much talk

12.  What women hear from women… › Intimacy › Request for acknowledgement › Understanding › Strengthening connections

13.  Understand… › Cross-cultural communication › Not everyone thinks/acts/reasons identically › Clear, open & transparent communication will take you far

14.  Do… › Ask questions for clarity › Control/limit metamessages › Strive to understand intentions › Be open to listen  Don’t… › Expect everyone to think like you › Make assumptions based on sex › Be dismissive or invalidate others

16.  Quick and easy read  A little repetitive in some themes  Assumptions and generalizations are a big part of the overall picture  Being willing to understand will take you far