1. Human Behavior Communication/ Conflict

2.  How you deal with conflict comes from your unique personality and what you learned growing up.  How is your style like your guardians?

3.  May respond to conflict by avoidance  Remove yourself from the situation  Leaving  Shutting up  Concealing  Postponing a confrontation until a better time

4.  Behavior description  Emotionally dishonest, indirect and self- denying  Listen and respond very little  Do not express honest feelings  Demonstrate a lack of respect for your own needs and rights

5.  Belief System  “I should never make anyone uncomfortable or displeased except myself. I’ll put up with just about anything from you; mu needs and my feelings don’t matter, you can take advantage of me”

6.  Advantage  You usually do not experience direct rejection or get blamed for anything  Others think of you as nice, selfless, easy to get along with  Approval is important to you

7.  Disadvantage  Take advantage of  Store up anger  Do not get your needs met

8.  Respond to conflict by fight  Move against another with the intent to hurt  Domination

9.  Behavior-  Literally or verbally attach another person  Fighting, blaming, accusing, threatening, stepping on people without regard for the feelings, needs, or ideas  Load, rude, sarcastic  Intimidate others to overpower them

10.  Belief System  “ I have to put others down in order to protect myself; I must exert my power and control over others. This is what I want; what you want is of lesser importance or of no importance at all”

11.  Advantage  Others do no push you around  Protect themselves  Appear to be in control of their lives

12.  Disadvantage  Other person feels humiliated, defensive, resentful and hurt  Other do not want to be around you- wind up with enemies  Causes you to be more vulnerable and fearful of losing what you are fighting for: power and control  May create your own destruction

13.  Move toward your opposition until you are either closer together or on the same side  Cooperative problem solving- negotiation and compromise along the way

14.  Behavior  Stand up for yourself, express your feelings, do not let others take advantage of you  Considerate of others feelings  Defend your rights without abusing or dominating other people  Talk about things in such a way that others will listen and not be offended with the opportunity to respond

15.  Belief  “I respect myself and I have equal respect for others, too. I am not in this world to conform to others expectations, and likewise, they are not in the world to conform to my expectations.”

16.  Advantage  Get more of what you want without making other people made  Do not have to feel wrong or quality because you ventilated your feelings  Develop more fulfilling relationships  Feel good about yourself

17.  Disadvantage  Take some real risks in how others perceive you  May experience some hurts and disappointments