2. Session 5 Social Norms and Bystander Intervention

3. Our ground rules Confidentiality Appropriate language Attendance Communicating with the facilitator

4. Social Norms feedback

5. 4 Stages for intervention 1. Notice the event2. Interpret it as a problem3. Feel responsible for dealing with it4. Possess necessary skills to act Adapted from Berkowitz, A. (2009) Response Ability: A Complete Guide to Bystander Intervention, Beck & Co., p.10

6. New Zealand bystander video https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iUj2OHL AG3w

7. Discussion questions Who could have intervened to stop this happening? When could they have intervened?

8. Bystanders The Flatmate The Stranger The Bartender The Best Friend

9. Bystander Intervention Options Adapted from Berkowitz, A. (2013). A Grassroots’ Guide to Fostering Healthy Norms to Reduce Violence in our Communities: Social Norms Toolkit. USA: CDC. Online at http://www.alanberkowitz.com/Social_Norms_Violence_Prevention_Toolkit.pdf OR Decide to Intervene During the incident After the incident Confrontation: Set limits or express feelings Change the focus: Non-participation Change the subject Interrupt / distract Change the person/shift attitudes Confrontation: Set limits or express feelings Change the focus: Non-participation Change the subject Interrupt / distract Change the person/shift attitudes Assess norm Engage allies & bystanders Make a plan Develop a support for next step Offer support to the victim Assess norm Engage allies & bystanders Make a plan Develop a support for next step Offer support to the victim Indirect (to the bystander) Direct (to the offender)

10. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=R6- PluWcNwU

11. Range of Behaviours Healthy, age-appropriate, mutually respectful, safe Mutually flirtatious, playful Situation- or age-inappropriate or non-mutual Harassment Sexually abusive & violent Adapted from Cordelia Anderson via Tabachnick, J. (2010). Making a Difference: Your role in preventing sexual violence on campus. NSRVC.org/saam

12. Golden Rule Only intervene when it is safe for you to do so. If not safe, in an emergency, dial 999

13. DURING AdvantagesDisadvantages AFTER AdvantagesDisadvantages Adapted from Berkowitz, A. (2009) Response Ability: A Complete Guide to Bystander Intervention, Beck & Co., chapter 3. WHEN?

14. How might you intervene in the moment?

15. Suggestions Shift the focus Interrupt the behaviour (diversion / distraction) Don’t respond Don’t laugh or engage Leave Deflection – changing the subject Reframe – change the remark into something positive Confrontation Say why it is unacceptableSay why it bothers you Raise consequences that the offending person identifies with

16. How might you intervene later?

17. Suggestions Confrontation Shift the person / change attitude Ask another person to intervene Offer help to the victim

18. Confrontation Express interest in offending person Give reasons why you are concerned Share how you/others feel Ask if the offending person understands your point Look at alternative behaviour/ support them in change Adapted from Berkowitz, A. (2009) Response Ability: A Complete Guide to Bystander Intervention, Beck & Co., pp.42-44 - I care - I see - I feel - I want - I will Adapted from http://stepupprogram.org/wp- content/uploads/2014/04/Step UP_Intervention_Styles.pdf

19. Shift the person / change attitude Make them understand why they behave as they do and why their behaviour is problematic so you change their attitude Needs a conversation with respect for all – listening is important Identify what is underlying the behaviour Engage in ‘open talk’ – show interest in understanding the person and why they behave as they do Adapted from Berkowitz, A. (2009) Response Ability: A Complete Guide to Bystander Intervention, Beck & Co., pp.47-51