1. Discipline and Punishment

2. A Common Dilemma  Think of your own child, a child you have cared for, or a child that you have observed someone else caring for.  Think of a time that the child misbehaved.  How did you (or the adult in charge respond)?

3. What is discipline?

4. What is punishment?

5. Discipline is…  To teach; to disciple; to lead by example  Encourages children to internalize standards for behavior  Is positive guidance; teaches child HOW TO behave rather than HOW NOT TO behave  Provides healthy structure/rules/routines for a child

6. Reciprocal Discipline  Related to the misbehavior  It “fits the crime”  Involves making restitution of compensation for the misbehavior

7. Punishment is…  Punitive, harsh  Demeaning  Focuses on stopping misbehavior but fails to teach positive behavior  Induces anxiety or arousal (fear, sadness, anger) in child which may interfere with child’s ability to learn from punishment

8.  Effective in the short-term, but not in the long run  Often does not work unless the “law enforcement officer” is present  Does not teach positive behavior  Does not help children internalize values

9. Expiatory Punishment  Punitive measures that are unrelated to the child’s misdeed  Punishment does not fit the crime

10. The Hot Topic: Corporal Punishment  Any intentional infliction of pain in response to a child’s unwanted behavior or language  AKA physical punishment, and physical discipline  Can range in frequency, severity, quickness of administration, and duration across childhood  Common forms  Slapping on the leg, arms, or rear (spanking)  Hitting with a hand or an object  Pinching  Washing mouth out with soap or making the child taste hot sauce as a punishment

11. Approval of CP  Majority of parents approve but approval rating has declined during the last few decades (Straus, 1996)  Over 94% in 1968  68% in 1994  International Parenting Study analysis currently in progress  Even parents who do not approve of corporal punishment may use it at times

12. Prevalence of CP  Most children receive some form of corporal punishment at least once during childhood  In the United States (Straus & Stewart, 1999):  35% of infants prior to age 1  Between 80 and 90% of preschoolers  Roughly half of 12 year old children  About 25% of children between the ages of 14 and 17

13. Variations by…  Gender of parent  Parents own experiences  Socioeconomic status  Race of parent  Religious beliefs of parents  Geographic location of parent  Number of children in the family  Age of child

14. The Controversy: What’s the Big Deal?  Many parents rely on corporal punishment  Belief that it is for child’s own good and not harmful  Belief that they received it and “turned out fine/OK”  Cite religious scripture and common sayings (spare the rod, spoil the child)  Research has found that CP is effective for achieving immediate compliance (Gershoff, 2002)  Research has also found that CP poses several threats to children’s development which has called its use into question (Gershoff, 2002)

15. An Overview of the Research Findings  Immediate compliance  Lower moral internalization  Greater aggression  Greater externalizing behavior problems  Greater risk of depression later in life  Greater risk of abuse of spouse or child  Greater risk of sexually deviant behavior

16. Regardless of the Research…  It is very unwise for professionals to recommend corporal punishment—you never really know who you are talking to  Many school settings and childcare settings prohibit CP  Even parents who do use CP would like to be aware of alternative strategies  There are some non-physical strategies that can also pose a threat to children

17. Strategies for Effective Guidance: Making Discipline Work  Be nurturing and responsive on a regular basis— stay connected  Begin with age-appropriate expectations! We all need a little grace at times  Promote positive behavior  Attempt to understand the child’s motivation—how are they conceptualizing the situation?  Value each child’s uniqueness

18.  Begin early  Encourage children to think and reason through a problematic situation  Be consistent! (But still be age-appropriate)  Recognize that nothing is effective all of the time—it’s a process

19. A Few Good Strategies  Redirection  Natural Consequences  Logical Consequences  Making and Enforcing Rules  Emotion Coaching  Problem Solving Discipline  Time Out with a Problem Solving Approach  Take a Parent’s Time Out

20. Redirection  Great for infants and toddlers, and good for older children, too!  Attempt to view the situation through the child’s eyes.  Simply help the child to focus their attention on something else.  Create an environment that enhances positive behavior.  Be a thinking parent and anticipate problematic situations when possible.

21. Natural Consequences  Parent does nothing and lets the situation teach the lesson.  The easiest option (well sometimes).  Do nothing. Let the consequence of the misbehavior teach the lesson.

22. Logical Consequences  Parental enforcement is required.  Do something, but make it related to the misbehavior.  Guide the child in making the situation right.  Include them in the discipline process. What do you think I should do in this situation? What do you think you should do in this situation?  Follow through with your discipline plan.

23. Make Rules and Enforce Them  Involve child in making rules.  Ask the following…  What are you doing? (Bring attention)  What is the rule? (Help them to remember and articulate)  Why do we have this rule? (Helps child to understand the reason for the rule)  What is the consequence for breaking the rule? (Reinforces that misbehavior has consequences)  Follow through with the consequence!

24. Emotion Coaching  Address the misbehavior.  Discuss the misbehavior with the child to determine the cause.  Focus on helping the child pinpoint his or her negative feelings.  Encourage the child to think of alternative ways to deal with those feelings.

25. Problem Solving Discipline  Discuss the misbehavior with the child.  Encourage the child to identify the problem.  Help the child to understand their misbehavior.  Encourage the child to generate alternative ways to deal with the problem in the future. The more possibilities that the child generates, the better.

26. Time Out: A Better Way  Put the child in a designated area to think about what they did wrong and what they could have done differently.  Use an age appropriate timeline (about a minute for each year of age).  Before removing the child from time out, discuss how they misbehaved and what they could do next time.

27. Take a Time Out for Yourself  If you are feeling overwhelmed, ensure that the child is in a safe place and take a break.  Use humor when appropriate.  Take care of yourself!  Spend positive time with your child.

28. Further Reading “Hands-On”Applied Sources  The Discipline Book by William Sears, M.D., and Martha Sears, R.N.  www.askdrsears.com www.askdrsears.com  Parenting Assistance Line: www.pal.ua.eduwww.pal.ua.edu  Attachment Parenting International: www.attachmentparenting.org www.attachmentparenting.org  Families Count: www.familiescount.netwww.familiescount.net  Raising a Thinking Child: Help Your Young Child to Resolve Everyday Conflicts and Get Along with Others by Myrna Shure & Theresa DiGeronimo

29. Research Articles and Sources  Beating the Devil Out of Them by Murray A. Straus, Ph.D.  Gershoff, E. T. (2002). Corporal punishment by parents and associated child behaviors an experiences: A meta-analytic and theoretical review. Psychological Bulletin, 128(4), 539-579.  Smith, A. B. (2004). What do children learn from being smacked: Messages from social science theory and research. Childrenz Issues, 8(2), 7-15.

30.  Straus, M. A., & Stewart, J. H. (1999). Corporal punishment by American parents: National dataon prevalence, chronicity, severity, and duration, in relation to child and familycharacteristics. Clinical Child and Family Psychology Review, 2, 55-70.  Mulvaney, M. K., & Mebert, C. J. (2010). Stress appraisal and attitudes towards corporalpunishment as intervening processes between corporal punishment and subsequentmental health. Journal of Family Violence, 25, 401-412.