1. NOVEMBER 26, 2012 SIENA COLLEGE PRESENTED BY: JENNY NIGRO Domestic Violence 101

2. What is domestic violence?

3. Defining Domestic Violence A pattern of coercive behaviors that an abuser chooses to perpetrate which serves to establish, demonstrate and maintain their power and control over family/household members or intimate partners.

4. Current Statistics National Coalition Against Domestic Violence Source information can be found at http://www.ncadv.org/http://www.ncadv.org/ 1 in 4 women will experience domestic violence in their lifetime An estimated 1.3 million women are victims of physical assault by an intimate partner each year 85% of domestic violence victims are women Domestic Violence is on of the most chronically underreported crimes Approximately only one quarter of all physical assaults, one-fifth of all rapes and one half of all stalkings perpetuated against females by intimate partners are reported to police.

5. What causes domestic violence?

6. Domestic violence is caused by… …an abuser’s choice to perpetrate acts/behaviors/violence with the goal of gaining and maintaining power and control against their intimate partner! It is not caused by:  Mental health issues  Substance abuse issues  A victim’s behavior  Loss of control  In fact, it is a very controlled act

7. Power and Control Wheel The Concept of the Wheel “Power and control" are in the center of the wheel, as they represent the core of DV A batterer systematically uses threats, intimidation, and coercion to instill fear in his partner. These behaviors are the spokes of the wheel. Physical and sexual violence holds it all together—this violence is the rim of the wheel. Power and Control Wheel

8. Forms of Abuse Psychological abuse Emotional Abuse Financial/ Economic Abuse Sexual Abuse Physical Abuse

9. Emotional abuse Undermining or attempting to undermine a person’s sense of self worth Manipulating another’s feelings and emotions. GUILT Making and breaking promises Making partner feel bad about self Name calling, put downs, humiliating

10. Psychological abuse Instilling or attempting to instill fear Destruction of property and pets Forcing/coercing victim to commit and/or participate in crimes Threaten to harm self or others

11. Psychological- Isolation Using Isolation: controlling what she does, who she sees and talks to, what she reads, where she goes Limiting her outside involvement, Using jealousy to justify actions. Relocating family Isolating or attempting to isolate from friends, family, school and work

12. Psychological- Intimidation Using intimidation: making her afraid by using looks, actions, gestures, smashing things, destroying her property, abusing pets, displaying weapons.

13. Psychological- Coercion/Threats/Children Using Coercion and Threats: making and/or carrying out threats to hurt her, threatening to leave her, to commit suicide, to report her to welfare, making her drop charges, making her do illegal things. Using children: making her feel guilty about the children, using the children to relay messages,  Using visitation to harass her  Threatening to take children away  Threatening CPS involvement/using CPS involvement

14. Psychological - Minimizing, denying, and blaming Making light of the abuse and not taking her concerns about it seriously Saying the abuse didn't happen Shifting responsibility for abusive behavior, saying she caused it.

15. Financial/ Economic abuse Making or attempting to make a person financially dependent Forbidding attendance at school Forbidding employment On-the-job harassment Justification of all money spent Forced welfare fraud Withholding family financial info. Running up bills (high credit cards)

16. Physical abuse Inflicting, attempting or threatening to inflict injury (i.e. hitting, kicking, shoving, hair pulling) Withholding access to resources to maintain health  Medications, medical care, food, fluids, sleep, hygiene Forcing drug and/or alcohol abuse  Both by force and coercion

17. Sexual abuse Coercing or attempting to coerce any sexual contact without consent  Can include:  forced sex after a beating  unprotected sex  attacks on sexual body parts  sex with others Attempts to undermine a person’s sexuality, criticizing sexual performance desirability Accusations of infidelity, withholding sex

18. Using Male Privilege Setting expectations for relationship/household that they feel fits with stereotypical gender roles  Can include:  Demanding meals, sexual relations at their request  Controlling finances/discipline of children GENDER ROLES- What are they?  Males  Females Socialization of gender- When does it start?

19. Why do victims of domestic violence stay? Fear Financial reasons Children Housing issues Isolation Geographical issues Mobility issues LOVE BETTER TO ASK WHY A BATTERER CHOOSES TO ABUSE AN INTIMATE PARTNER, RATHER THAN AS TO WHY THEY STAY!!

20. Systems Community Resources Legal Welfare Child welfare Housing Unity House Domestic Violence Program: (518) 272-2370 Equinox Domestic Violence Services: (518) 432-7865 National Domestic Violence Hotline: 1-800-799-SAFE Services

21. Healthy Relationship Wheel

22. Questions?

23. Jenny Nigro CPS Liaison Unity House Domestic Violence Program (518) 272-5917 x.238 jnigro@unityhouseny.org