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Tips For More Effective Parenting Tricia East, PBI Coach Taken from: EmpoweringParents.com
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Positive Behavior Intervention Coach Positive Behavior Intervention is Brock’s Gap version of In-School Suspension. The goal of PBI is to review past behavior and redirect future behavior. Mom of Two JB, 14, eighth grade Carleigh, 10, fifth grade
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You are not the only one who gets worn down by your child. Being a calm, effective parent doesn’t necessarily come naturally or easy. No parent is perfect. Don’t get down on yourself if you slip back in to old habits. Your child and your sanity are worth working hard for.
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Between your child’s action and your reaction, you have the space to decide how it is best to think, feel and respond. You have a choice. It’s important to remember that kids naturally fight to get what they want. To not give in can take superhuman effort.
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STEP ONE: Create and stick to a structured routine in the evenings. The more kids know about what to expect and when to expect it, the more comfortable they will be. Stick to it… especially at the beginning.
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STEP TWO: Fully Explain Expectations Sit down sometime and explain to you child what you expect from them each night in the area of homework, chores, screen time, etc. Don’t be upset if you find that you have to teach them how to meet those expectations.
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STEP THREE: Reward Positive Behavior Say “thank you” when your child does something positive such as sitting down to do homework without being prompted or doesn’t argue when asked to take out the trash. You may have to really stretch at first to find something to praise. But don’t give up!
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STEP FOUR: Make Punishments Clear and Non-Emotional Rather than flying off the handle and screaming, “You’re grounded for a month!!” (which for all practical purposes grounds YOU for a month, plan ahead for the most likely pitfalls in behavior and what the appropriate punishment would be. That way your child knows what’s coming and knows he/she could have avoided it.
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STEP FIVE: Remain Calm Your child needs you to be in control and when you become emotional over behavioral issues, you are not in control anymore. Your child will feed off of your energy, whether it be calm or frantic.
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Will it be easy? Will it work all the time? Will you lose your temper? Does that make you a bad parent? Is your family worth it?
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