1. Grief

2. Roberta Temes Stages of Grief: Numbness
Mechanical functioning and social insulation
Disorganization
Intensely painful feelings of loss
Reorganization
Re-entry into a more ‘normal’ social life

3. George Bonanno Suggests avoiding feelings has a protective function
Expressing negative emotions can prolong grief
Research on 9/11:
Those who did not express their reactions immediately showed fewer signs of distress 2 years later
Those who were asked to express their reactions immediately had a harder time adjusting 2 years later
Journal of Consulting and Clinical Psychology (2008)

4. Grieving
BUT:
Asking people about an event immediately does not give the person a chance to process the information in their own time.
It implies that they should be upset.

5. Grieving Grief is never over. Worst grief within 6 months
As time passes, we focus more on good memories than sadness
If there are unresolved issues that cause emotional pain, it may help to talk to someone
Counseling only shows a benefit when participants displayed difficulty adapting to loss

6. Elizabeth Kubler-Ross
Studied 500+ participants with terminal illness or who experienced catastrophic loss
Identified 5 stages of grief
As with all stage theories- are they really concrete? Do we go through ALL and in the same order?
Role of age:
How do we feel if the person is 103?
How do we feel if the person is 10?

7. UP House flying scene: whole clip (3:00)
Stage 1: denial
Usually only a temporary defense for the individual
Feeling is often replaced with heightened awareness of who will be left behind after death
“I’m fine.”
“This can’t be happening to me.”
UP House flying scene: whole clip (3:00)

8. Romeo and Juliet: whole clip (2:30)
Stage 2: Anger
Individual recognizes that denial cannot continue
Misplaced feelings of rage, resentment or blame
“Why me?!”
“It’s not fair!”
“How can this happen to me?”
Romeo and Juliet: whole clip (2:30)

9. Beauty and the Beast: 0-2:30 OR 4:30
Stage 3: Bargaining
Hope that death can be postponed.
Often negotiation with a higher power in exchange for reformed behavior
“ Just let me live to see my grandchildren graduate”
“I’ll do anything for a few more years.”
Beauty and the Beast: 0-2:30 OR 4:30

10. Stage 4: Depression
Begin to understand the certainty/finality of death
May become silent, refuse visitors, spend time crying
Not recommended to try to cheer a person up in this stage- an important part of processing.
“Why bother with anything?”
“What’s the point?”
Lion King: 1:30-4:00

11. Forest Gump: whole clip (1:50) Up mementos: whole clip (3:18)
Stage 5: acceptance
Individual begins to come to terms with mortality
“It’s going to be okay”
Forest Gump: whole clip (1:50)
Up mementos: whole clip (3:18)

12. Terminator 2
Watch John Connor, Sarah Connor, and the Terminator in this scene. Identify one example of each stage of grief according to Kubler-Ross:
Denial
Anger
Bargaining
Depression
Acceptance