1. Narrative Feedback Mr. C Le Pard

2. What was expected of the task? Create a narrative Based on one of the prompts Show a grasp of narrative writing – Plot (Problem, Climax, Rising Action etc.) – Character (Sympathetic characters we can empathise with) – Description (Of emotions and the 5 senses)

3. How did it go? Generally OK. Most have a basic grasp of narrative HOWEVER some struggle with logical plotting Some attempts to create tension and to describe BUT often too brief and inconsistent (does not build)

4. Language Issues Major issues included: – Tenses – Grammar/Phrasing: awkward or casual – Lack of description: no 5 senses + emotions Touching Looking Smelling Tasting Hearing – Dialogue and thought rules New line

5. Tenses Deciding between past and present If a narrator is speaking outside of the story they will always speak in the PAST TENSE unless the story is still going on (i.e. before a flashback within the story) HOWEVER If something is described which remains the same after the story it is PRESENT TENSE Example My cousin was the greatest soccer player ever! (suggests cousin is no longer: either dead or someone better) My cousin is the greatest soccer player ever!

6. Description Exercise Make use of description to create an effective short story. Example: Describing a chocolate cake 1. The cake smelled good and was tasty Rewrite this sentence using the five senses to help you describe the cake See, Smell, Touch, Taste, Sound 1.

7. Narration Exercise Example: Telling rather than showing. 1.I was really scared. 2.My heart pounded in my chest as my breathing increased and my ears rang. Was this the end? Practice: Rewrite this sentence so that it shows rather than tells the reader a character is afraid: 1.John was scared because the wood was dark and scary. 2.

8. Narrative Issues – Illogical plotting – Too much exposition Telling not showing – Contradictions/Logical fallacies – No problem or climax

9. Dialogue Issues Difference between a thought and speech He must be mad my brain screamed What a prat I mumbled under my breath. Start dialogue on a new line