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CHD 002 Summer 2015 June 25, 2015
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CAJAS – Clarification & Presentations Reviewed Assignment Sheet Shelley shared her box
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Another Perspective… Reasons for Difficult Behavior Developmental reasons Got it, lost it Unmet emotional needs Lousy local conditions A child hasn’t been taught yet
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How do YOU respond to Guidance issues? Count off by 6 In your small group: Brainstorm ideas for responding to difficult behavior Take notes! 10 minutes
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How do YOU respond to Guidance issues? Explain situation Redirect to other toy Stay neutral - give attention to all Talk with older children separately Get to the “real” story Eye contact Acknowledge child’s feelings “How would you feel if…” Ask questions Know they are loved even when acting out, especially when they are acting out. BEFORE when possible Paraphrasing for the developmental age of the child “Quiet” sign – older children Listen to the child, pause and they talk – when you can ACTUALLY go TO the child and get to their level Use tone to help get messages across Give children with difficult behavior MORE positive attention about what is going WELL with that child Have a relationship with the family “It’s ok to cry”, let the emotions out Sometimes talk around other topics until they are ready to talk – older Work for as much as consistency as possible – home/school/other house or setting Positive Discipline (find the cause) – What should they do next time
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Responding to Guidance Issues Give Feedback Allow children to experience consequences of their actions Use time outs appropriately (NOT a punishment) Reward desired behavior Ignore misbehavior that is not designed to attract attention Teach pro-social behavior Meet Needs
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12 Strategies for Effective Limit Setting 1. Honor the Impulse 2. Active Listen 3. Sportscast 4. Facilitate 5. Use “I” messages 6. Set positive limits 7. Give a Choice 8. Give information 9. Natural consequences 10. Redirect 11. Invite children’s initiative 12. Set the stage for future success
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Honor the Impulse Remember the 4 reasons for difficult behavior EVERY behavior has an impulse, usually a healthy impulse The BEHAVIOR is the issue, NOT the child How CAN the child do what they are trying to do?
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Active Listen Listening is a learned skill We practice what is modeled for us LISTEN first, then talk LISTEN more than you talk REALLY listen, to more than the words Use your body to show you are listening
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Sportscast Works particularly well in conflict with others Describe what you see Be objective Be descriptive Stop to listen
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Facilitate For older children with verbal skills Used to facilitate conflicts Use open ended questions to help children solve their own conflicts EXAMPLE: “I see you want Nathan’s toy. Is there another way you can ask for it?”
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Using “I” messages NO ONE can “make” someone else feel something We choose our emotions When we blame others for our emotions, they learn to do the same “When you _____ and you________, I felt_____ because _________.” Sometimes a “because” is needed too
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Positive Limit Setting Imagine a world without limits Children NEED limits How do we tell them what they CAN do MORE than what they CAN’T do?
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Give a Choice Choices give children power but help them stay in the limits of what is ok Choices should ALWAYS be something you can do Choices should be clear and concrete Choices should be limited, 2-3 choices
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Give Information Particularly useful with situations where children don’t understand something Works very well with verbal children Gear the explanation to the children’s developmental level Helps children make good choices
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Natural Consequences There are natural consequences all around us They happen without you doing anything EXAMPLE: “When you pull the cat’s tail, she might scratch you.”
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Redirection What CAN they do REMEMBER to Honor the Impulse Find activities that meet their needs in that moment
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Invite Children’s Initiative Ask them to help plan Involve them in your projects Ask them HOW you should do things
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Set the Stage for Future Success Who believes in you? How do we let our children know that we believe in them even when they are misbehaving? Do we REALLY believe they will learn the new skill? Do we tell them we believe in them. How do we set up the environment for success? How do we prepare them for success?
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“Every child needs one caring adult who is crazy about him/her. ~ U. Bronfenbrenner https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=isfw8JJ-eWM
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One Caring Adult Reflect back on the role of your “One Caring Adult” in the development of your resilience. How did their support of your self-esteem tie into their help making you resilient to the stresses and traumas of your childhood? If you could tell them one thing, what would it be? Partners – 5 minutes
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Assignments: ATTACHMENT PAPER DUE TONIGHT!! CAJAS – DUE Next Week! Thursday, July 2! CAJA presentations Thursday (7/2) and Tuesday (7/7) Journals DUE Tuesday (See 6/23 PPS) Reading Reminders : Handouts (on Angel 6/23/2015) Child, Family and Community – Chapters 6 & 7 Diversity in Early Care and Education – Chapters 6
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