For The Northside church of Christ

For The Northside church of Christ
A family Bible class For The Northside church of Christ

The Family & the Home Introduction 1 The Home at the beginning 2
God’s Purpose In Marriage 4 . Preparing for Marriage 5. Preparing for Marriage 6 Selecting a Mate for life 7. Why Marriages Fail 8 The role of the husband 9 The Role of the wife 10 The Role of the wife 11 The roll of the Children 12 The roll of the Children 13. Discipline in the Home 14 Family Problems 15, 16

An examination of God’s law, (and the error of men) on the subject of “marriage, divorce & remarriage.

Divorce and Remarriage
Marriage Is A Divine Institution and is Governed By The Laws Of God – A Controversial Subject!! An Emotional Subject!! A Personal Subject!! An Extremely Important Subject!!!!!! A Subject That Needs To Be Addressed Often!

Genesis 2:18-24 (NKJV) 18 And the Lord God said, "It is not good that man should be alone; I will make him a helper comparable to him." And the Lord God caused a deep sleep to fall on Adam, and he slept; and He took one of his ribs, and closed up the flesh in its place. 22 Then the rib which the Lord God had taken from man He made into a woman, and He brought her to the man. Divorce and Remarriage

Genesis 2:18-24 (NKJV) 23 And Adam said: "This is now bone of my bones And flesh of my flesh; She shall be called Woman, Because she was taken out of Man." 24 Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and they shall become one flesh. Divorce and Remarriage

Malachi 2:14-16 (NKJV) 14 Yet you say, "For what reason?" Because the Lord has been witness Between you and the wife of your youth, With whom you have dealt treacherously; Yet she is your companion And your wife by covenant. 15 But did He not make them one, Having a remnant of the Spirit? And why one? He seeks godly offspring. Divorce and Remarriage

Malachi 2:14-16 (NKJV) Therefore take heed to your spirit, And let none deal treacherously with the wife of his youth. 16 "For the Lord God of Israel says That He hates divorce, For it covers one's garment with violence," Says the Lord of hosts. "Therefore take heed to your spirit, That you do not deal treacherously." Divorce and Remarriage

Divorce and Remarriage God’s Institution
Genesis 2:24 (NKJV) Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and they shall become one flesh. to impinge, i.e. cling or adhere; abide fast, cleave (fast together), follow close (hard after), be joined (together), keep (fast), overtake, pursue hard, stick, take.

God’s Institution Malachi 2:14 (NKJV) . . . the Lord has been witness Between you and the wife of your youth, she is your companion And your wife by covenant. Prov 2:17 Which forsaketh the guide of her youth, and forgetteth the covenant of her God.

God’s Institution Eccl 5:4-5 (NKJV) When you make a vow to God, do not delay to pay it; For He has no pleasure in fools. Pay what you have vowed-- Better not to vow than to vow and not pay. Malachi 2:14 (NKJV) . . . the Lord has been witness Between you and the wife of your youth, she is your companion And your wife by covenant.

The Teaching of Jesus Matthew 5:31-32 (NKJV) 31 "Furthermore it has been said, 'Whoever divorces his wife, let him give her a certificate of divorce.' 32 But I say to you that whoever divorces his wife for any reason except sexual immorality causes her to commit adultery; and whoever marries a woman who is divorced commits adultery.

The Teaching of Jesus Matthew 19:1-10 The question of the Pharisees… v. 3 Jesus’ answer… v. 4-6 The Pharisees’ attempt to put Jesus in conflict with Moses… v. 7-8 Jesus’ teaching on divorce and remarriage v. 9

The Question Testing Jesus
Divorce and Remarriage The Teaching of Jesus The Question Testing Jesus Matthew 19:3 (NKJV) 3 The Pharisees also came to Him, testing Him, and saying to Him, "Is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife for just any reason?" Is the marriage relationship subject to be dissolved at the mere whim and pleasure of either party? Akibah – Looks Hillel – Cooking Josephus – Any cause

The Teaching of Jesus Jesus Appeals To God’s Original Order Matthew 19:4 (NKJV) 4 And He answered and said to them, "Have you not read that He who made them at the beginning 'made them male and female,' The Answer: NO Jesus refers them to the original institution governing ALL of mankind

The Teaching of Jesus Joined, (cleave KJV) - roskollao proskollao Matthew 19:5 (NKJV) 5 and said, 'For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh'? What men are to do! “to adhere to closely, be faithfully devoted to, join” BDAG - A Greek-English Lexicon of the New Testament and Other Early Christian Literature.

The Teaching of Jesus Joined, συζεύγνυμι, syzeugnymi Matthew 19:6 (NKJV) 6 So then, they are no longer two but one flesh. Therefore what God has joined together, let not man separate." What God does! "to yoke together" (syn, "with," zygos, "a yoke"), is used metaphorically of union in wedlock, in Matt. 19:6; Mark 10:9. — Vine's Expository Dictionary of Old and New Testament Words

The Pharisees’ Objection
Divorce and Remarriage The Teaching of Jesus The Pharisees’ Objection Matthew 19:7 (NKJV) 7 They said to Him, "Why then did Moses command to give a certificate of divorce, and to put her away?" Moses said it was OK!! They insinuate that He contradicts Moses— Moses had allowed such divorces, Deuteronomy 24:1 and if he had allowed them, they inferred that they could not be unlawful. It is not an unusual case for the impure and unholy to seek for a justification of their conduct from the law of God itself, and to wrest Scripture to their own destruction.— Adam Clarke's Commentary

The Pharisees’ Objection
Divorce and Remarriage The Teaching of Jesus The Pharisees’ Objection Matthew 19:8 (NKJV) 8 He said to them, "Moses, because of the hardness of your hearts, permitted you to divorce your wives, but from the beginning it was not so. Moses “permitted it” The law as given in Deuteronomy 24:1 to govern their failure to follow God’s original design of marriage. Provided protection for the woman.

The Teaching of Jesus The Way It IS According To Jesus Matthew 19:9 (NKJV) 9 And I say to you, whoever divorces his wife, except for sexual immorality, and marries another, commits adultery; and whoever marries her who is divorced commits adultery." Fornication: The term is the Greek porneia, and is defined as "illicit sexual intercourse." Fornication has reference to physical sexual intercourse with another.

The Way It IS According To Jesus
Divorce and Remarriage The Teaching of Jesus The Way It IS According To Jesus The man who divorces his wife FOR FORNICATION and marries another DOES NOT commit adultery. The man who divorces his wife FOR REASONS OTHER THAN FORNICATION and marries another commits adultery. The man who marries a woman who has been divorced (put away) commits adultery.

Attempts of Men To Get Around This Text
Divorce and Remarriage The Teaching of Jesus Attempts of Men To Get Around This Text Jesus was teaching the Old Law and does not apply to us – (Dan Billingsly) This Law does not apply to those in the world – only to Christians – (Homer Hailey) Paul gives other exceptions in 1 Cor (Mike Willis)

Divorce and Remarriage The Teaching of Paul
Romans 7:2-3 (NKJV) 2 For the woman who has a husband is bound by the law to her husband as long as he lives. But if the husband dies, she is released from the law of her husband. 3 So then if, while her husband lives, she marries another man, she will be called an adulteress; but if her husband dies, she is free from that law, so that she is no adulteress, though she has married another man.

Have your own wife, not another’s, - 1 Cor 7:2; Mk 6:17-18 (Rom 7:3)
Divorce and Remarriage The Teaching of Paul 1 Corinthians 7:2 (NKJV) 2 Nevertheless, because of sexual immorality, let each man have his own wife, and let each woman have her own husband. Have your own wife, not another’s, - 1 Cor 7:2; Mk 6:17-18 (Rom 7:3)

1 Corinthians 7:10-11 (NKJV) 10 Now to the married I command, yet not I but the Lord: A wife is not to depart from her husband. 11 But even if she does depart, let her remain unmarried or be reconciled to her husband. And a husband is not to divorce his wife. The command? The parenthetical phrase? (cf 1 John 2:1,2) What must be done if command is violated!

The Command Husband not to divorce Wife not to depart But If you disobey the command, there are but two options: Remain unmarried OR Be reconciled

1 Corinthians 7:15 (NKJV) 15 But if the unbeliever departs, let him depart; a brother or a sister is not under bondage in such cases. But God has called us to peace. Not “Under Bondage” (doulow): to make a slave, reduce to bondage Denotes a “servile condition.” Noun and verb used 133 times in N.T., never refers to marriage bond.

Not “Under Bondage” The departure of the unbelieving spouse releases a person from spousal duties, but it does not sever the tie of marriage. Hold to Christ, even if it means being deserted by one’s unbelieving spouse 1 Corinthians 7:15 (NKJV) 15 But if the unbeliever departs, let him depart; a brother or a sister is not under bondage in such cases. But God has called us to peace.

1 Corinthians 7:15 (NKJV) 15 But if the unbeliever departs, let him depart; a brother or a sister is not under bondage in such cases. But God has called us to peace. Not “Under Bondage” A different Greek word is used for being “bound” in marriage - deō .. which means “to tie, bind.” (Logos Greek Lemma) - (as in I Cor. 7:27, 39; Rom 7:2 ). Bound – but not a slave 1 Corinthians 7:15 “What about what Paul said in 1 Corinthians 7:15?” The verse reads, “But if the unbeliever departs, let him depart; a brother or a sister is not under bondage in such cases. But God has called us to peace.” The contention is made that the phrase “a brother or a sister is not under bondage in such cases” indicates their right to remarry if deserted by an unbelieving spouse. Our first allegiance is to God, not men. It is in light of this principle that Paul makes his statement. Some might take Paul’s teaching on marriage to put the believer in an untenable situation. In effect, “You say that God’s laws on marriage demand you stay with the unbeliever. Am I obligated even if my spouse is unwilling to live with a Christian?” Should the believer be forced to renounce his faith to save his marriage. Paul says “NO”. The believer is a slave to God, not men, (verse 23 of the text, “You were bought at a price; do not become slaves of men.”). If an unbeliever is unwilling to stay with the believer, on account of his faith, then the believer is not obligated (not under bondage) to remain in that relationship “let him depart...” “Let him go, because you are not enslaved to the unbeliever – you are enslaved to Christ.” Such an understanding of this statement by Paul is not only indicated by the context (and greater context of New Testament teaching), it is also borne out by the Greek. The term translated “not under bondage” (dedoulotai), is the “perfect passive indicative” form of the Greek term (douloo). Those who take the position that a Christian is free to remarry believe the phrase “not under bondage” has reference to the marriage bond. The Greek does not allow this. Then, the idea would be that in the past bondage existed, but is not present now. The Greek demands that it never has been so. “We ought to obey God rather than men” (cf. Acts 5:29). When Jesus said, “except for fornication” he was not establishing an exception, rather the only exception. Those who seek to add a “Pauline privilege” to Jesus’ exception have no standing in scripture.

Sin Involved In Every Divorce Remember Your Vows I ____, take thee ____, to be my wedded wife, to have and to hold from this day forward, for richer or poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish, till in death we part, - I, ___, take thee ____ to be my wedded husband, to have and to hold from this day forward, for richer or poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish, till in death we part, - Mal 2:13-16 Eccl 5:1-6 Mat 5:31,32 Mat 19:3-9 1 Cor 7:10,11 It makes one a covenant-breaker (Pr. 2:16-17; Mal. 2:14; Rom. 1:28-32) Proverbs 2:16-17 (NKJV) To deliver you from the immoral woman, From the seductress who flatters with her words, [17] Who forsakes the companion of her youth, And forgets the covenant of her God. Malachi 2:14 (NKJV) Lord has been witness Between you and the wife of your youth, With whom you have dealt treacherously; Yet she is your companion And your wife by covenant. Romans 1:28-32 (NKJV) And even as they did not like to retain God in their knowledge, God gave them over to a debased mind, to do those things which are not fitting; [29] being filled with all unrighteousness, sexual immorality, wickedness, covetousness, maliciousness; full of envy, murder, strife, deceit, evil-mindedness; they are whisperers, [30] backbiters, haters of God, violent, proud, boasters, inventors of evil things, disobedient to parents, [31] undiscerning, untrustworthy, (covenant breakers), unloving, unforgiving, unmerciful; [32] who, knowing the righteous judgment of God, that those who practice such things are deserving of death, not only do the same but also approve of those who practice them. It casts a stumbling block (Mt. 5:31-32; Lk. 17:1-2; Rom. 14:13, 21; 1 Cor. 10:31-33) Matthew 5:31-32 (NKJV) [32] But I say to you that whoever divorces his wife for any reason except sexual immorality causes her to commit adultery; and whoever marries a woman who is divorced commits adultery. Luke 17:1-2 (NKJV) Then He said to the disciples, "It is impossible that no offenses should come, but woe to him through whom they do come! [2] It would be better for him if a millstone were hung around his neck, and he were thrown into the sea, than that he should offend one of these little ones. Romans 14:13 (NKJV) Therefore let us not judge one another anymore, but rather resolve this, not to put a stumbling block or a cause to fall in our brother's way. Romans 14:21 (NKJV) It is good neither to eat meat nor drink wine nor do anything by which your brother stumbles or is offended or is made weak. Creates victims – Mal 2:14 Malachi 2:14 (NKJV) Yet you say, "For what reason?" Because the Lord has been witness Between you and the wife of your youth, With whom you have dealt treacherously; Yet she is your companion And your wife by covenant. A destroyer of lives - family & society Adversely effects every relationship

God’s Law On Marriage Marriage is the joining together by God one man and one woman for life. Divorce is sinful with but one exception Remarriage is adultery with but two exceptions

God’s Law On Marriage Matthew 19:4-6 (NKJV) 4 And He answered and said to them, "Have you not read that He who made them at the beginning 'made them male and female,' 5 and said, 'For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh'? 6 So then, they are no longer two but one flesh. Therefore what God has joined together, let not man separate."

God’s Law On Marriage Matthew 19:8-9 (NKJV) 8 He said to them, "Moses, because of the hardness of your hearts, permitted you to divorce your wives, but from the beginning it was not so. 9 And I say to you, whoever divorces his wife, except for sexual immorality, and marries another, commits adultery; and whoever marries her who is divorced commits adultery."

Those Eligible For Marriage
Divorce and Remarriage Those Eligible For Marriage One who has never been married (1 Cor. 7:8-9, ) One whose first mate has died (Rom. 7:2-3; 1 Cor. 7:8-9, 39) One who has put away his mate for fornication (Mt. 19:9) One who reconciles with a lawful mate (1 Cor. 7:10-11) One who has never been married (1 Cor. 7:8-9, 27-28) 1 Cor. 7:8-9 (NKJV) But I say to the unmarried and to the widows: It is good for them if they remain even as I am; [9] but if they cannot exercise self-control, let them marry. For it is better to marry than to burn with passion. 1 Cor. 7:27-28 (NKJV) Are you bound to a wife? Do not seek to be loosed. Are you loosed from a wife? Do not seek a wife. [28] But even if you do marry, you have not sinned; and if a virgin marries, she has not sinned. Nevertheless such will have trouble in the flesh, but I would spare you. One whose first mate has died (Rom. 7:2-3; 1 Cor. 7:8-9, 39) Romans 7:2-3 (NKJV) For the woman who has a husband is bound by the law to her husband as long as he lives. But if the husband dies, she is released from the law of her husband. [3] So then if, while her husband lives, she marries another man, she will be called an adulteress; but if her husband dies, she is free from that law, so that she is no adulteress, though she has married another man. 1 Cor. 7:39 (NKJV) A wife is bound by law as long as her husband lives; but if her husband dies, she is at liberty to be married to whom she wishes, only in the Lord. One who has put away his mate for fornication (Mt. 19:9) Matthew 19:9 (NKJV) And I say to you, whoever divorces his wife, except for sexual immorality, and marries another, commits adultery; and whoever marries her who is divorced commits adultery." One who reconciles with a lawful mate (1 Cor. 7:10-11) 1 Cor. 7:10-11 (NKJV) Now to the married I command, yet not I but the Lord: A wife is not to depart from her husband. [11] But even if she does depart, let her remain unmarried or be reconciled to her husband. And a husband is not to divorce his wife.

Sin Is Committed If: One divorces his/her spouse for some reason other than adultery. One divorces his/her spouse for some reason other than adultery and marries another. A person marries another who is divorced and adultery by their mate was not the cause. The put away guilty mate remarries. One who has never been married (1 Cor. 7:8-9, 27-28) 1 Cor. 7:8-9 (NKJV) But I say to the unmarried and to the widows: It is good for them if they remain even as I am; [9] but if they cannot exercise self-control, let them marry. For it is better to marry than to burn with passion. 1 Cor. 7:27-28 (NKJV) Are you bound to a wife? Do not seek to be loosed. Are you loosed from a wife? Do not seek a wife. [28] But even if you do marry, you have not sinned; and if a virgin marries, she has not sinned. Nevertheless such will have trouble in the flesh, but I would spare you. One whose first mate has died (Rom. 7:2-3; 1 Cor. 7:8-9, 39) Romans 7:2-3 (NKJV) For the woman who has a husband is bound by the law to her husband as long as he lives. But if the husband dies, she is released from the law of her husband. [3] So then if, while her husband lives, she marries another man, she will be called an adulteress; but if her husband dies, she is free from that law, so that she is no adulteress, though she has married another man. 1 Cor. 7:39 (NKJV) A wife is bound by law as long as her husband lives; but if her husband dies, she is at liberty to be married to whom she wishes, only in the Lord. One who has put away his mate for fornication (Mt. 19:9) Matthew 19:9 (NKJV) And I say to you, whoever divorces his wife, except for sexual immorality, and marries another, commits adultery; and whoever marries her who is divorced commits adultery." One who reconciles with a lawful mate (1 Cor. 7:10-11) 1 Cor. 7:10-11 (NKJV) Now to the married I command, yet not I but the Lord: A wife is not to depart from her husband. [11] But even if she does depart, let her remain unmarried or be reconciled to her husband. And a husband is not to divorce his wife.

Repentance Is Required For Guilty
Divorce and Remarriage Repentance Is Required For Guilty If contemplating divorce for ANY reason other than fornication – reconsider in light of God’s word. If unlawfully divorced – reconcile if possible. If in a sinful relationship – cease your involvement. Ezra 10:10-12

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