1. Leaders in the Making Teamwork – Lesson 4 Selfless

2. The great leader is not the one in the spotlight; he is the one leading the applause. Commitment to Excellence Consider this...

3. Review Define and describe character. List and describe the attributes of the intentional person. Things you do for other people are usually among the best things you do. To Your Success

4. What does the selfless person look like? 1.The selfless person is generous. They practice the reality of “it is better to give than to receive.” They give from the heart, not to gain recognition. 2.They don’t try to manipulate others “to their side” of an issue. The selfless person is transparent and sincere. 3.They are others-centered. Selfless people consider the needs of others or the team before their own. 4.Selfless people are loyal. They are committed to those on the team.

5. What does it look like? There are times in life when you have to step up and do something hard, or in my case, admit to a mistake. It all started with my best friend, Michelle. There was a new movie coming out called, A Walk to Remember. We agreed to wait and see it together. It was one of those things that girls do when they are best friends. Well, the next day, another friend of mine, Megan, called and yes, you got it, asked if I wanted to go to a movie. She wanted to see the new movie that was out called, A Walk to Remember. I said, “Sure, let me ask my dad.” This little voice inside me whispered, “What about Michelle? You promised to see the movie with her?” I told that little ‘voice’ that Michelle wouldn’t care.

6. Continued... I went to see the movie with Megan. We had a good time and I thought the movie was pretty good. We both cried. The next day in school Michelle came up to me and asked if I could go see the movie, A Walk to Remember tonight. I replied that I just saw it yesterday with Megan. Michelle, not saying a word, just walked away. I didn’t know what to say, so I just hung my head and said nothing. The next day at school we had our field day. The event was a sack race. Neither Michelle nor I had a partner. Our teacher noticed it right off. She wondered why the two of us were not working together. I quickly told her the story. She suggested that I apologize to Michelle. I felt my guts lurch. I inhaled, gathered my courage and headed over to talk to Michelle.

7. The rest of the story... I jumped right in with my apology. I didn’t know if she’d forgive me, yell at me, laugh at me, or even still be mad at me. She looked me in the eye and simply said, “That’s okay.” I felt rotten; I almost wished she would have yelled at me or something. She was glad I was able to see the movie. She hadn’t gone and blabbed to the whole school how rotten I had been, and she still wanted to be my friend. We ran the sack race together. I can’t say that we won, actually we came in second to last place. But I sure learned a lesson. Promises are important things to keep and loyal friends are really your best friends. LaShay Chmielewski

8. What do you think? 1.How did Michelle exhibit the character traits of the selfless person? 2.How did LaShay (the author) exhibit selfish character traits? 3.What could LaShay have done differently? 4.If you could rewrite this story, how would it end?

9. Practice it... Briefing: This activity works well in the gym (if it’s available). You will need the volleyball net and a ball. An alternative would be to use a balloon and play with a make-believe net in your classroom. Divide the class into teams. Either divide into two teams and everyone rotates into the game, or divide into four teams and two teams observe for fifteen minutes while the other two teams play for fifteen minutes. This activity is called Tri-Ball. In this activity you play volleyball just like a regular volleyball game using the regular rules for serving, boundaries and scoring points. However, whenever a team hits the ball THREE times on its side before sending it over the net, they score one extra point. This means that you don’t have to be serving the ball to score points.

10. What do you think? 1.What happened on your team? 2.Did having the ability to score points for more than just serving (three hits = one point) change your focus for the game? 3.Were you more concerned about winning or getting three hits? 4.Did your team earn points for three hits? What did it take for you to be able to do this? 5.Would you say that changing your focus changed your attitude? How? 6.How would changing your focus in the classroom or at home help you be more selfless? 7.What will it take for you to think selflessly? How could you begin to practice selflessness?

11. Review The selfless person is one who: is generous with their time, talents and things; is loyal; is others-centered; doesn’t try to manipulate people for their own personal gain.

12. Date your journal entry. Describe yourself in relationship to being selfish or being selfless. Sometimes it is easy to be selfless, like sharing M & M’s when you have a three pound bag or letting someone cut in front of you to give a speech in speech class. At other times it is very difficult to be selfless, like letting someone have the biggest piece of cake, or taking the last shot in a basketball game. How are you when it comes to being selfish vs. being selfless? When is it easy for you to be selfless? When is it hard for you to be selfless? Journal # 5

13. It isn’t difficult to make a buck, but it’s tough to make a difference. Tom Brokaw Selfless people make a difference.