1. Chapter 7 Tips for Success 9-10 Writing Companion © Perfection Learning ® Reproduction permitted for classroom use only. 1 Lesson 1 Ten Tips for Quick Revision (p. 98) ❒ 1. Reread your main idea carefully. It should be stated precisely and clearly. ❒ 2. Compare your introduction and your conclusion. They should both address the main idea. ❒ 3. Be sure your body paragraphs have enough details such as relevant evidence, well-chosen facts, precise words, and sensory language. ❒ 4. Check for appropriate and varied transitions between paragraphs and between sentences.

2. Chapter 7 Tips for Success 9-10 Writing Companion © Perfection Learning ® Reproduction permitted for classroom use only. 2 Lesson 1 Ten Tips for Quick Revision (p. 98) ❒ 5. Read your essay silently, but slowly, word-by-word, as if you were giving a speech. Revise any awkward words or phrases. ❒ 6. Look for words you might have omitted or written twice. ❒ 7. Check the style and tone of the essay. Usually, you should use a formal style and objective tone. ❒ 8. Check that each pronoun refers clearly to a noun and is used correctly.

3. Chapter 7 Tips for Success 9-10 Writing Companion © Perfection Learning ® Reproduction permitted for classroom use only. 3 Lesson 1 Ten Tips for Quick Revision (p. 98) ❒ 9. Insert commas where they are necessary. Delete commas where they are not. ❒ 10. Correct any misspelled words. If you are writing your essay on a computer, some of these may be highlighted by the word processing program.

4. Chapter 7 Tips for Success 9-10 Writing Companion © Perfection Learning ® Reproduction permitted for classroom use only. 4 Lesson 1A Applying the Tips (p. 99) On the following screens is an essay written in response to the prompt, “Do the benefits of zoos outweigh the drawbacks?” Write changes in the margin next to each underlined word or phrase. At the end of the change, write the number of the tip that addresses this type of mistake.

5. Chapter 7 Tips for Success 9-10 Writing Companion © Perfection Learning ® Reproduction permitted for classroom use only. 5 Lesson 1A Applying the Tips (p. 99) Do you want to help save the Eastern Elk, one of the big animals found by the European settlers in North America? You are too late. According the Fish and Wildlife Service, this animal went extinct by the end of the nineteenth century. However, it is not too late for other animals. I like zoos. Change big to most impressive. (Tip 7) Change You are too late to If so, your concern has come too late. (Tip 10)

6. Chapter 7 Tips for Success 9-10 Writing Companion © Perfection Learning ® Reproduction permitted for classroom use only. 6 Lesson 1A Applying the Tips (p. 99) Do you want to help save the Eastern Elk, one of the big animals found by the European settlers in North America? You are too late. According the Fish and Wildlife Service, this animal went extinct by the end of the nineteenth century. However, it is not too late for other animals. I like zoos. Change According the to According to the (Tip 6) I like zoos. to Supporting zoos can help preserve endangered species. (Tip 1)

7. Chapter 7 Tips for Success 9-10 Writing Companion © Perfection Learning ® Reproduction permitted for classroom use only. 7 Lesson 1A Applying the Tips (p. 99) One benefit of zoos is that they provide home for species, that are becoming rare. According to an article in Scientific American, “dozens of zoos across North America” work together to save endangered species, and they have have “helped bring black-footed ferrets, California condors, red wolves, and several other endangered species back from the brink of extinction.” Change species to species (Tip 9) Change have have to have (Tip 6)

8. Chapter 7 Tips for Success 9-10 Writing Companion © Perfection Learning ® Reproduction permitted for classroom use only. 8 Lesson 1A Applying the Tips (p. 99) In addition to providing shelter for endangered species, zoos can educate poeple about why we should protect animals. Research funded by the National Science Foundation found that “visitors believe they experience a stronger connection to nature as a result of their visit” to a zoo or an aquarium. My brother worked at a zoo, and he really liked it. Change poeple to people (Tip 10) Delete My brother worked at a zoo, and he really liked it. (Tip 3)

9. Chapter 7 Tips for Success 9-10 Writing Companion © Perfection Learning ® Reproduction permitted for classroom use only. 9 Lesson 1A Applying the Tips (p. 99) Critics say that zoos are terrible places for animals. This is nutty. However, modern zoos can offer large spaces and natural habitats for the animals in them. Nevertheless, living in the wild can be really terrible. Getting eaten by another animal is a horrible death. Delete This is nutty. (Tip 7) Change Nevertheless to In addition (Tip 4)

10. Chapter 7 Tips for Success 9-10 Writing Companion © Perfection Learning ® Reproduction permitted for classroom use only. 10 Lesson 1A Applying the Tips (p. 99) Zoos, by saving species and to make educated the people, can help protect animals for the future Making zoos good places for animals might cost a little more money, but animals are worth it. For all its benefits, zoos deserve our support. Change to make educated the to educating (Tip 5) its to their (Tip 8)